---
title: 'Everything Wrong With Michael In 20 Minutes Or Less'
source: 'https://youtube.com/watch?v=TqV58MZN7GI'
video_id: 'TqV58MZN7GI'
date: 2026-06-30
duration_sec: 1241
---

# Everything Wrong With Michael In 20 Minutes Or Less

> Source: [Everything Wrong With Michael In 20 Minutes Or Less](https://youtube.com/watch?v=TqV58MZN7GI)

## Summary

This video is a Cinemasins-style critique of the Michael Jackson biopic 'Michael', pointing out numerous historical inaccuracies, storytelling clichés, and missed opportunities. The narrator systematically lists flaws from the film's portrayal of Jackson family dynamics to its treatment of Michael's creative evolution, all while maintaining a sarcastic tone.

### Key Points

- **Faulty introduction of characters** [01:39] — The movie introduces actor Gary before Michael, which is a confusing narrative choice.
- **Joseph Jackson's complex truth** [02:27] — Joseph Jackson's statement about race and poverty makes him a more complicated antagonist than the movie allows, but the film never develops him beyond a stock abusive father.
- **Identity assembly over human development** [03:43] — The movie shows how Michael Jackson assembled his performer identity but leaves him underdeveloped as a human being.
- **Anachronistic song placement** [04:23] — The film uses 'Never Can Say Goodbye' before 1969, even though the song was released in 1971.
- **Inaccurate discovery story** [04:48] — The Jackson 5 were actually discovered by a Canadian soul band, not Suzanne de Passe as depicted.
- **Unexplained age lie** [06:22] — Michael is shown lying about his age (saying 8 instead of 10) but the movie never explains why this mattered.
- **Bubbles timeline error** [11:01] — Michael adopted Bubbles around 1983, not 1980 as the movie suggests.
- **Billie Jean vs Thriller timeline** [16:53] — The movie implies Michael performed Billie Jean at the Motown Special after filming Thriller, but the video filming started in September 1983, months after the May 1983 special.
- **Overreliance on musical montages** [19:45] — The film is 75% musical montages and performances, with so little story it feels like home videos rather than an intricate narrative.

## Transcript

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Want to be starting something? plays
over a full minute of logos, proving
this movie does not, in fact, want to be
starting something. Bad start, Michael.
BAD START.
Michael Jackson demonstrates the
emotional state of every Cinema Sins
writer assigned to a biopic. Also,
Comcast
chant credits, in case you confused it
with Gary Cise. Also, movie introduces
Gary before Michael. How's the beeping,
Michael? How's the beeping, Michael?
Michael. Michael.
>> Mike, get back in line. Movie King
Richards itself so hard from the get-go,
I felt like I was getting slapped in the
face by Will Smith in front of a live
audience. Thank goodness that's not
something Will Smith would do to anyone
in real life. This makeup occupies the
fascinating middle ground between Joseph
Domingo and Coleman Jackson. This
Volkswagen product placement is
directing interested customers to the
year 1966.
>> Mikey, why are you playing with your
food?
>> Movie has time to prove that those give
it to Mikey, he'll eat anything
commercials were always [ __ ]
>> Come on. You know he never eats.
>> Shut up, Latoya.
>> Poor Latoya. I can't imagine what it
must have been like to be the only girl
in the Jackson family because Joseph and
Catherine Jackson only had the one
daughter. No need to fact check.
>> Look, I made a face.
>> Just count Mr. Bill.
>> Let me tell you something.
>> Cuz it's the fastest who gets paid and
it's the fastest who gets laid.
>> Yeah. Some poor black kids from Gary,
Indiana. Ain't nothing going to be added
to you.
>> Joseph Jackson is saying an
uncomfortable truth here. The problem is
that acknowledging structural realities
of race and poverty makes him a
considerably more complicated antagonist
than your typical stock abusive father.
And the movie never fully develops him
into a person whose worst behaviors were
built around some very real
observations.
>> No more Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, Marlin,
>> or Janet, Randy, or Reby either,
apparently. Throwing coins at performers
on stage.
>> Set up your instruments. Come on.
>> They have school in the morning. What do
you mean?
>> The movie spends a lot of time showing
the Jacksons practicing and almost no
time showing what they were practicing.
Did Joseph Jackson have an actual
teaching philosophy or was his entire
curriculum just again?
>> You tired and you think you did good. Is
that right, Michael? Seriously, the
heavy makeup and prosthetics can be so
distracting at times. I think I'm about
to hear Eddie Murphy's impersonation of
a Queen's Barber whenever he opens his
mouth.
>> You and you. Who's next?
>> Gone. Big nose.
>> The biopic equivalent of planting a tree
whose fruit is future plastic surgery.
>> Captain Hook met his fate in the jaws of
his old enemy.
>> Actually, in just about every version of
Peter Pan, Captain Hook survives this.
So, also, the other Jackson kids are
sleeping surprisingly well with Michael
inventing the audio book and all.
Michael appears to have confused
emotional processing with evidence for
the audience creation. Living room
rehearsal. Joseph asking Michael to keep
his eyes on him. More living room
rehearsal. Excitement. Movia has given
this Volkswagen bus more screen time
than several family members. Reading.
The audience knows Michael will
eventually star in The Whiz, so the
movie plants the Wizard of Oz in his
childhood as a retroactive destiny
marker. The movie spends a lot of time
showing us how Michael Jackson assembled
his identity as a performer. Every
influence becomes a future dance move,
vocal choice, or stage persona. By the
end of the film, Michael Jackson feels
meticulously constructed as an
entertainer and strangely underdeveloped
as a human being. Joseph's narrative
function as an abuser continues
replacing his character with a living,
breathing trauma explanation. Laughing
together as a family gets reduced to a
montage footnote while every trauma
receives a full congressional hearing.
Also, generic shot of a family laughing
around the dinner table during a montage
is generic and montagey.
>> We are laughing.
>> Am I removing a sin for never can say
goodbye? Yes. Am I adding a sin because
we aren't even into 1969 yet and they
didn't release this song until 1971?
Also, yes. Mot
laughing at a noun.
>> I'll be in touch, Mr. Jackson.
>> Suzanne says she'll be in touch, but
gives Joseph a card with her number on
it and doesn't get his number. Is she
going to call her own number? Also, the
movie wants us to believe that Suzanne
Deac discovered the Jackson 5 and
brought them to Mottown Records, but in
reality, a Canadian soul band helped
them get a recorded audition at Mottown
that convinced Barry Gordy to sign them.
So, the sin as always is Canada. Also,
also the Jackson 5's brief and exciting
search for industry connections has been
completed at the speed required by the
runtime. Nice year.
>> We'll start with Michael.
>> This subtle foreshadowing of Michael as
the alpha and the omega of pop music.
Heaven Loren Tate and Neil Long both in
the same movie, but not giving them one
scene together and the proper reunion
that all of us Love Jones fans have been
jonesing for.
>> Michael, um, this is Clen Fandango. Can
you hear me?
>> Say Joseph, don't you worry about
keeping the boys on schedule. We got
this over here. Joseph Jackson's
displacement becomes one of the movies's
biggest recurring tracks. The deeper
cuts appear to have been left off the
album, but also scene sets up all this
tension between Joseph and Barry Gordy
that is never brought up again. Gordy is
only in a couple more scenes after this
bit and they're basically drivebys.
Pointless tension is pointless.
>> I've been doing this a long time. Never
heard a voice quite like yours.
>> The Supremes, the four tops, Marvin Gay,
the Temptations, Glattus Knight, and
Stevie Wonder have all entered the chat.
>> What's EQ?
>> Equalization.
>> And Antoine Fukqua directed The
Equalizer, which can't possibly be
unrelated. movie treats this hug like a
major transfer of emotional power. Yet,
there are no signs that either Joseph or
Barry experienced the quickening.
>> Hey, Michael, you can ask me anything
anytime you want.
>> And by most accounts, Barry Gordy was an
influential figure in Michael's life.
But judging by Loren Tate's screen time,
Michael never asked him another question
that the movie thought was relevant.
>> In this business, you can make up just
about anything.
>> Bold statement coming from a movie based
on a true story, humanity briefly
considered making televisions almost
round.
>> Michael, how old are you? presenting
child superstardom as a fascinating fact
rather than a potentially alarming
situation. In this press conference,
Michael has asked how old he is. And
even though he's 10, he says eight, like
Barry Gordy instructed him to. So this
movie has now spent two goddamn scenes
on this kid lying about his age by two
whole [ __ ] years. And yet it gives us
zero explanation as to why that's
important and it never comes up again.
Musical biopic has a random insert of
the Billboard chart showing the song's
climb to the top cliche. This Peacock
reminding me I need to cancel Peacock
before I get build again. There is more
Disney masturbation going on in this
movie than in most movies that are
actually produced by Walt Disney.
>> And make sure you put your rat in the
cage this time.
>> Movie accidentally credits Marlon
Jackson on melancholy and the infinite
sadness.
>> Meet Bill Bray. He's your new head of
security.
>> Skipping the casual chain of why
security and jumping straight to the
narrative importance of this guy. Also,
Bill Bray spends the rest of the movie
appearing to be both head of security
and all of security.
>> Guard him with your life.
>> I don't know why this line is trying to
make me think Bill eventually took a
bullet for Michael instead of living to
be 80 years old. Michael, you're missing
the best part.
>> Pretending there's even a good part in
Singing in the Rain. Also, Michael
watches Singing in the Rain and the
movie immediately starts refining it
into the fuel for some future
performance, ignoring the possibility
that he simply enjoyed a film wanton.
>> And llamas have three stomachs so they
can digest their food because all they
eat is vegetables.
>> Support for my argument that I'm
anatomically obligated to eat
cheeseburgers somehow makes it into the
script.
>> So, you want me to bring some spitting,
agitated animal into my house? Catherine
acts like she didn't raise nine
children.
>> And you don't need another pet.
>> They're not my pets. They're my friends.
>> As generic and tiresome as much of this
movie can be, one striking thing is the
performances. And while Jafar Jackson is
rightly credited for bringing the pop
singer to life as an adult, we shouldn't
discount Juliano Valdi's performance as
a young Michael. He makes acting seem
like it's ABC. Easy as one, two, three.
Sorry, I'll leave now.
>> But don't you want to meet real friends?
Like kids your own age?
>> I'm not like the other kids. They don't
treat me like a real person. All they
want to do is stare at and take pictures
of me.
>> The psychology of growing up famous
enough that your peers stop treating you
like a person may have deserved more
than one conversation in a movie
covering the entirety of his youth.
>> Then you know what Jehovah says.
>> Scene that mentions Jehovah does not
also contain a Last Crusade.
>> May you let your light shine.
>> Understanding skip. Michael delivers an
emotionally convincing performance of
I'll be there in a movie mostly
uninterested in the question of where a
child acquired that emotional
vocabulary. serenating an audience
member without their explicit consent. I
know it's the 70s and I have heard the
Steve Harvey bit, but god damn, as
popular as the Jackson 5 were at this
point, they couldn't afford to have more
than one mic on stage.
>> Pure escapism, Quincy.
>> Damn, Jafar Jackson nails the voice
without making it weird. Well, any
weirder than Michael Jackson's voice
already wants?
>> How are you going to tell your father
about a solo album?
>> Just the tip of the iceberg on what
we'll hear about Joseph's feelings on
Michael's solo career. While the movie
remains considerably less curious about
his brother's opinions on the matter. I
need you to tell my father that the solo
album is your idea.
>> I hope you enjoy that. Michael decides
something he wants to do but is scared
to tell his dad so he'll have someone
else do it until finally he kind of does
it himself in the end stick because it
will happen around 87 more times.
>> I need the freedom to write the music
and lyrics that pop into my head.
>> The movie treats this like a major
creative breakthrough without ever fully
explaining what was stopping Michael
from writing songs in the first place.
It's not like we all arrived at the
theater with a working knowledge of
1970s Mottown songwriting policies. I
own his ass from 9 to5.
>> Painting the life of a rock star as a
Monday through Friday 9 to5 situation
might be the most unbelievable part of
this movie.
>> We get some sleep, Lily.
>> The movie keeps presenting potentially
deeper character revealing behaviors and
then filing them away under Michael was
quirky. Also, kissing a llama without
his explicit consent.
>> You ready, Joker?
>> Honestly, one of the better portrayals
of the character that DC has put out in
recent years. I'd
>> rather let Louie drive.
>> To be fair, llamas are statistically
better drivers than 98% of humans.
>> Keep these feet still. The fact that
this movie thinks Michael not being able
to keep his feet still in a recording
studio is an interesting enough subject
that it had to be broached twice.
>> You're confident, you're strong, you're
beautiful.
>> Using a discount Steuart Smallley guide
to hyping yourself up in the recording
studio.
>> I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And
dog gone it, people like me.
>> The song he is singing, Don't Stop Till
You Get Enough, becomes a musical
metaphor for consuming enough great
Michael Jackson songs that you stop
noticing how little new information
you're learning about Michael Jackson. I
hope Michael will ask the air for
consent for gyrating that forcefully,
but I doubt he did. The days when Tower
Records still existed in the US. Godamn
you, Spotify. Fan mail will consume a
surprising square footage of this house
and this movie's runtime. Michael's
charitable work isn't really up for
debate here. The movie's tendency to
deploy it as supporting evidence
absolutely is. Scarface money counting
meme energy. Oh man, they drag poor
Robbie Williams into this mess.
>> I want you to be my new friend. Bubbles
>> scene does not contain the relief on
Joseph and Catherine's face when the
bubbles Michael is referring to ends up
being a chimpanzeee and not a random
stripper he brought home. Also, we are
currently in the year of our lord 1980.
And while the exact year that Michael
adopted bubbles has never been agreed
upon publicly, it was definitely closer
to 1983 than 1980. Movie doesn't adopt
bubbles correctly.
>> I rescued him from this awful place, you
know, where they do testing on animals.
>> But I left all the other animals there
because [ __ ] them. Am I right?
>> Chimps are sensitive though, you know,
discern sounds and and people. Movie
thinks it has time for a quick lesson on
the safety measures to take around
chimpanzees and it does not.
>> This is Neverland.
>> Movie repeatedly points us toward it
connection to Peter Pan as though the
reference itself constitutes an
explanation.
>> The Lost Boys
>> scene mentioning the Lost Boys does not
contain a Kefir William Frederick
Dempsey George Rufus Sutherland.
>> Just Ben cream from a veneiligo.
>> Somehow certain topics became mandatory
stops on the Michael Jackson storytime
express.
>> You see my face isn't symmetrical.
>> It is.
>> You're the boss. Bruce Springsteen has
entered the chat trying to touch the
whole world without enthusiastic
consent.
>> Maybe I should get a nose job.
>> Sister
>> muscle says everybody does.
>> Taking your plastic surgery advice from
a python. As reported in many medical
journals, pythons give terrible medical
advice. Also using everybody does it as
your reason for doing said thing
everybody is doing.
>> The Jackson family is the brand. That's
our Coca-Cola.
>> The Rock and Roller Cola Wars are never
credited on this film.
>> Folks going to go out there and stop
buying some Pepsi.
>> They will not. Let's go. Michael storms
out of the family meeting to find Billy
ready and waiting by his car. This may
have really happened this way, but it's
still hella convenient that he wasn't
taking a poop. Wait, did Billy read the
script? One minute of mopey motor
moving.
>> And no matter what you do, he's only
ever going to see it as a family
success.
>> Viscount Den Visel encourages you to
move against the family. Oh no. Movie
really spells this one out for us and
underlines it multiple times. The fact
that skinny ties were ever in fashion.
>> I mean, the whole point's going solo,
right? Alex Hnold. Every time he walks
past something that doesn't need to be
climbed, somehow makes it into the
script.
>> You want to be the biggest star in the
world.
>> Can you help make that happen?
>> They could have just smashed cut to
Michael standing on the torch of the
Statue of Liberty and gotten me out of
here in under an hour.
>> How?
>> Because I believe there's no one like
you.
>> John Brana was just asked how he could
make Michael the biggest star in the
world. And instead of answering
specifically how he would do it, he just
blew more smoke up Michael's ass. And so
this works. Joseph did not get fired by
Fax Machine in real life. And I don't
mind the movie attempting to make this a
more dramatic kind of thing than what
was probably a boring meaning in real
life. But fired by facts isn't exactly
lighting the place on fire either. This
joker's got terrible marksmanship.
>> How do I sign this?
>> Signing something that the person is now
forced to purchase in order to keep the
autograph. Also, autographing items in a
store before the customers have bought
said items.
>> Guys, look. I got Twister.
>> I can't figure out if it's weirder that
Michael thinks his grown brothers would
want to play Twister or that if he was
that into board games, he didn't already
own Twister. Or maybe I'm just weird.
Let's just send all three. Who has time
for this? His dad is right there when he
turns around because being caught off
guard remains one of the cheapest ways
to manufacture tension. Also, Michael
seems surprisingly unprepared for the
possibility of encountering the angry
man he just fired in the house they both
live in.
>> Firing your own father.
>> Thinking that's worse than exploiting
your own son for your own financial
gain. And maybe that's the point. But
god damn it, I still hate fathers like
Joseph. So, I'm going to send the out of
him.
>> You got a lot to learn about family.
>> Joe will continue trying to get this
movie to cross over into the Fast
franchise.
>> He's an actor. He's a movie director and
he writes songs.
>> I have a dog.
>> Kids,
>> it's a dog send. He's getting fat.
>> Body shaming your pets. What an [ __ ]
>> If Haley's comic came every year, just
year after year, would you look at it?
>> Yes. Humans line up for Manhattan every
year. Michael, we are not complicated.
>> If I'm not here to receive these ideas,
God might give him the prince.
>> But also, that's Princess. I can't
imagine a world where taking your llama
for a walk makes you the weird one.
This finger snapping song forming
sequence just beats it for all the
sometime. As someone who believed before
the movie that the man had thoughts and
took notes, I find that not much is
being revealed here.
>> I think music and dance is what we all
have in common.
>> Michael gives a stump speech about why
gang violence is bad. And the movie
seems prepared to declare mission cure
the world of gang violence accomplished.
We're still beating it, y'all. The
movie's idea of people working on this
together is less meaningful rhetorical
exchange and more watching Michael and
professional dancers rehearse
choreography. Considering Michael's
infamous sponsorship of Pepsi Coke's
product placement in this movie might be
the biggest [ __ ] you and I don't hate
it. I'm going to send it, but I don't
hate it.
>> CBS wants you to call the album Michael
Jackson
>> two week century.
>> But this is not his first album. He
would call the first album Michael or
Michael Jackson, not a later album. So
the sin is always his record executives
and Michael Jackson since in 2010 he
would release an album called Michael
like an [ __ ] If a horror movie is
being shown on television within a
movie, nine times out of 10 it's Night
of the Living Dead because it's in the
public domain cliche.
>> That's rock and roll. That's some Van
Halen.
>> I mean, maybe some Van Halen 3 [ __ ] but
otherwise, it most definitely is not. I
get you can't do a Michael Jackson movie
covering the 80s without showing some of
the thriller video, but it's still
cliched as hell and not as thrilling as
the movie would lead you to believe, and
definitely getting sick. Also, it's a
great music video. I've seen it a
thousand times. However, watching it
again somehow still doesn't tell me much
about the man making it.
>> If this kid did a duet with Reaper, we'd
own the goddamn country charts.
>> You're okay, Shrek.
>> We need to get his videos on MTV. MTV
tries as hard as it can to not play
music cliche.
>> Believe me, John, I have tried.
>> With love, Walter, please try harder.
>> And this record executive's heart grew
three sizes that day. He was having a
coronary, but once word spread of
Michael's powerful and vengeful magic, a
fear for their lives compelled MTV to
embrace black artists while somehow
continuing to grow more racist with each
successive season of The Real World.
>> Better still, second row. You don't want
to be in the front row for them. Those
French artists, they're not so big on
showering.
>> That's frenchest. Also, how would being
only one row back help you get away from
the stench?
>> You can put them all in a plastic bag,
cover the plastic bag in Crisco, and
then shove them up your ass. Yeah, your
butthole.
>> Krisco later issued guidance that this
was outside the intended use and put you
at higher risk for cholesterol-related
heart disease, but stopped short of
actively discouraging it. Also, the idea
that the head of MTV would have to have
the meaning of ass explained to him.
movie makes it seem like Michael
performed Billy Gene at the Mottown
Special after he filmed the Thriller
video. But the Mottown special was
filmed in March of 1983 and aired in May
of 1983. The Thriller Video didn't even
start filming until September of 1983.
>> They single-handedly revitalized the
music business.
>> This movie sure is a lot of tell and no
show. Maybe we could have at least seen
a little more of how he revitalized the
music business and less shopping for
toys. This singular dance move blew the
world's collective mind loads. So, it
would be criminal for a Michael Jackson
biopic not to include it. However, this
doesn't mean that the process by which a
human being first conceived of moving
like that must remain classified. Movie
acts like this crowd is any different
than a typical day in New York City.
Random final appearance of Barry Gordy
is random.
>> I love the way you promote your
fighters. You're the king of marketing.
>> Don King was a hell of a marketing
genius, but there were also countless
marketing geniuses that actually worked
in the music business that Joseph would
have been able to contact just as
easily. Just because the Don King
connection really happened doesn't make
it any less weird.
>> I may have something for you,
>> Pepsi.
>> Don King survives this. people who lays
around the house watching television who
don't take off their ties first.
>> Why are you here?
>> Well, he's here because the movie
remains convinced that Joseph Jackson
was the only obstacle in Michael's life
story and will continue to act
accordingly.
>> Can a father visit his son?
>> Equating visiting your son to snooping
around your son's bedroom when they
aren't there.
>> How many need you to do this for me, for
your family?
>> The movie remains frustratingly vague on
whether Joseph needs the victory tour
for his family, his finances, his
legacy, his ego, or some combination
thereof. Yeah, you'll be with all the
money in the world surrounded by people
who say yes to everything.
>> Joe is kind of right here. And the movie
does want you to know that, but it never
really wants you to feel that. Pepsi
almost killed arguably the most popular
person on the planet and didn't have to
shut down. The whole thing is [ __ ] up,
but in a weirdly impressive way. I mean,
2 hours of that legal minefield might
have been a more revealing narrative.
>> You have to stay on the demo for a
while.
>> I don't want to take medication. through
line to the circumstances of his
ultimate death is hinted at here as if
it is out of necessity even though it is
not in service of the story.
>> You see the number of people who have
already gathered outside the hospital.
If that isn't a testament to the star
power of Michael Jackson, I don't know
what is.
>> It's also the testament to how nosy and
unaware of personal boundaries most
people are. But for whatever reason, the
news never reports that aspect. I'm not
trying to downplay the extent to which
prescription meds led to the eventual
death of Michael Jackson, but this
movie's obvious and somewhat tackless
way of pointing us to where it started
is obvious and tackless. This movie
beats us over the head with a Peter Pan
metaphor harder than Peter Pan's
Neverland Nightmare. I didn't actually
see that movie, but just wanted to point
out the absurdity of a slasher film
called Peter Pan's Neverland Nightmare.
>> What about the other boys?
>> And Latoya can just go herself, I guess.
Jafar Jackson's stage performance as
Michael is very effective. I don't have
an interesting way to say everything.
Jeez, the Dodgers. This is our last and
final tour.
>> I get the telling his dad to off part of
all this, but his brothers have done
nothing. And I feel like at the very
least, Michael could have let them in on
this plan, making me kind of dislike the
title character less than 10 minutes
from the ending is a weird shift, but
here we are. Movie ends on 4 minutes and
4 seconds of a bad performance. Also,
this movie is 75% musical montages and
performances. And while considering it's
a movie about arguably the most famous
musical artist ever, it makes sense we'd
hear some songs, but there is so little
story in between that it almost feels
like a selection of home videos versus
an intricately laidout story. And maybe
you'd say, "I just came to hear the
songs." And then I would say, "That's
what Spotify is for, asshole." And then
you would say, "Why so hostile?" And
then I would give my best Julia Styles
impression and say,
>> "I'm not hostile. I'm annoyed."
>> And then you would say, "Oh god, 10
Things I Hate About You is a bigger
insult to Shakespeare than she's the
man." And then I killed you. juxtaposing
the possible death of this woman with
Michael Jackson lighting up the crowd
was a choice.
And that was it. Nothing else ever
happened of any interest in Michael
Jackson's life. That is the end of the
story. Oh, it's not the end of the
story. They've just decided to build two
biopics for twice the price.
Why does it hurt so much?