[00:00] This time for the month of July 2026 to see all the best stuff Hopefully, there has been some great submissions this month
[00:13] [Matt screams] A man has been charged with impersonating an FIB [FBI] agent after allegedly shooting himself and claiming he was injured in the line of duty
[00:31] [ULP] Detain this man! I mean, it was at least successful for Steve [Dave] Steve, put your gun down
[00:46] Do not try this at home, or really anything you see in GTA V This is a 100% true I've seen this guy all over TikTok
[01:00] and all I remember are GTA 5 NPC quotes You f*cker! No, I don't miss your 10-inch d*ck
[01:14] 'Cause you sold my dog for crack! Davidmaddoxreal There aren't cougars in missions
[01:27] Last heist, and this is what I pull off
[01:40] It's garbage, is what it is You see, it's not actually a mission You are wrong, Chicken Burger Enthusiast
[01:54] Nothing I say here will be seen or remembered We got him! typing this exact same thing all the time
[02:06] [Speaks gibberish] the person who does my subtitles Excalibur is savaging me
[02:21] which is perhaps even worse [Reading comment] Lowkey learned English with the old speedrun livestreams
[02:33] Upvote this to scare Matto If you missed the video, Fun fact, one of you guys contacted Commonwealth Bank
[02:49] 'cause you were moving to Australia and you were gonna use them as your bank you said 'cause I made my video What utter lies!
[03:02] I showed off in rambles that there coincidentally where it's just nonstop people complaining And how sh*t it's gotten and how terrible its service is
[03:16] They are terrible Starting slow Me looking like Butcher from The Boys
[03:29] Me when I was in New York When I was in Melbourne to put on Instagram
[03:45] My avatar that Rue made for me 10 years ago Think I was setting up my Valve index? Okay, same one as before
[04:01] I like this one I actually posted some of them to my other social media But thank you, Professional
[04:13] Matto in the new heist Is my forehead elongated there? That is definitely not how big my forehead is, okay?
[04:28] [Reading comment] This might get into the July Reddit Recap, He did go through the comments in the last Reddit Recap, Guess I better do some funny reply to this,
[04:42] I guess I have really pretty balls This is like the oldest meme ever My balls after shaving
[04:55] Elite ball knowledge No one has this many balls! Everything About The Kortz Center Heist DLC
[05:10] For those who didn't watch the video, there was actual anal This is why you need to watch every video that I release [Matt laughs]
[05:25] This is just nothing But it's somehow so funny DarkVIperAU My many adventures around the world
[05:41] [Matt laughs] and they just went “oh, there’s Peli in the corner” Post so good even Matt started dancing?
[05:58] How is this a video? DarkViperAU holding a black Viper next to a black Dodge Viper This does actually look like the Banshee GTS in GTA online
[06:10] Could you not have like removed my gut there? Praying he fixes his skill issues by November
[06:22] Watching Matt blame controllers for why he sucks at gaming GTA 6 on launch with the controller Every fail is going to be the controller's fault
[06:35] I’ve never failed on keyboard and mouse before [Reading comment] The Saints Row video was genuinely a pain to watch I've b*tched and whinged so much
[06:50] Or, "That's pretty funny" Other people are like, "How dare you slander the good name of my controller?" Fan meets DarkViperAUs
[07:03] [Matt laughs] What I love about this image, is, they're all different faces of me
[07:16] and then one fan in the middle Except for this one, which is just me f*cked up Wait there’s no...
[07:31] This arrow is nothing! Watching a two-hour movie Watching a seven-hour DarkViperAU speedrun
[07:45] My first PB in seven years, I lost my marbles like Like, there were some crash outs That was a mega crash out
[07:58] you didn't get it recommended because it was age-gated They no joke age-gated for a stupid reason And it's still age-gated!
[08:12] [Reading YouTube’s response] Hi Matt, thank you for reaching out about the demonetization I've reached out to our Trust and Safety Policy Ops team They'll get back to me within a few business days with an update
[08:25] I appreciate your patience Thanks for doing that It's just unfortunate that I w-
[08:39] -that this was my first speedrun improvement in seven years and I spent literally months working to make this run
[08:54] I would love to know, most importantly, despite my doing exactly what was asked
[09:09] Mistakes happen with age-gating I even explained that to my viewers
[09:24] The rejection of the appeal after blurring the screen Okay! No!
[09:40] Honestly, right now, the most painful thing for me about this heist It gives so little money
[09:53] Like, I thought it was bad doing the original heists And I wasn't even doing the setups and that took so long how long is it gonna take me?
[10:08] It's like 400k per heist, 35 minutes per speedrun It will take me 73 hours of speedrunning the heist Understand, that's perfectly optimally
[10:29] Which doesn't happen That's insane dude Yikes
[10:42] but at least I did all the other heists before this happened to do the awards and career progress now, effectively impossible
[10:55] Matto playing GTA Online for five minutes [Matt laughs] For the first time in a long time, I feel like...
[11:13] Wait, is that two different voices? For the first time in a long time, I feel like... He's wearing a black tank top too, that's funny!
[11:29] I have been enjoying the speedruns of I got other things I need to do The series has returned!
[11:45] You're as beautiful as the day I lost you Zoom into his eyes for a subtle detail It's the thumbnail in his eyes? Oh, that makes sense
[12:01] I was sick when I filmed this Oh my God! This is a terrible angle Holy sh*t
[12:17] Two, why did you record it? I bring back series and even months later, I still
[12:29] YouTube just doesn't recommend it to everyone There's like 20 something episodes! ...try to hopefully work to be back to current day
[12:44] I'm pulling more people onto the project, to hopefully get out more episodes but I've started the way that I've started now Power of a Haircut 2
[13:11] Nah, I'm lying to you I was wearing pants The first one got, like, no views?
[13:23] This is not my real beard! Oh, it's the thing!
[13:38] There's a game where you're a little dude He’s right there And...
[13:57] This is basically "Where's Waldo?" for current generation You could say this fish was millions to one The fish I wanted
[14:12] So you can swim in ice and you don't, like, die And I just grab a piece of ice and...
[14:25] Disingenuous and dense as seen through the reflections of my remote What?
[14:40] [Reading comment] As Nolan intended [Matt laughs ] Yes, the GTAmen clip
[14:54] It was a mistake that cost me an entire run [Midnight Swim playing in background]
[15:11] [Midnight Swim playing in background] [Matt] I saw that corpse I was like... I died to this stupid f*cking song as well!
[15:27] This corpse here, it gets caught on this corpse I feel his pain, I hate them Facts and features you probably [don’t] know #1
[15:41] If it has been, I'll never forgive you [Voiceover] It feels sort of strange to say it out loud, but over the last 5000 years I have spent over four hours speedrunning GTA 5
[15:54] Smoking dope and jerking off while he plays that f*cking game Here is Franklin's garage
[16:10] I originally intended for this video to be longer, but if it does well, I hope you're all doing we- Did he show where the other garages are?
[16:23] This guy's probably got a bright future ahead of him in telling people stuff A garage, yellow car
[16:40] [Speaking gibberish] I can't understand you Stop calling me!
[16:54] Brush plays AU Noire Why?
[17:08] I believe in the video I kept mistaking hand mirrors for brushes and so he replaced the brush with my face for some reason Awful
[17:21] Australia! Gambling in a casino? When you really think about it, missions are a form of gambling too /s
[17:34] If you want to know my full thoughts on Australia being the 56th country has been banned in, I made a full video on it It's either because there's gambling legislation
[17:49] that is coming in the future in Australia to very mildly reduce But that wouldn't target he online casinos But it's also possible that the legislation revolving around
[18:04] could have also inspired this, but who knows if that's true This took eight hours and is made of a total of 53 clips
[18:16] We’ve been doing well, making money Now I found a friendly ship captain We just need to pay passage and give him money for land
[18:32] We will disappear Be reborn An untouched paradise
[18:48] Absolute cinema AI to replicate a person's voice, to get them to say whatever you want If you guys want to make something like this in the future, use Filmot
[19:04] Tahiti Guy who runs the site does good stuff Good thing you told us the source of this image
[19:18] In an alternate timeline I know that, but I can't do it any other way, as I don't have any other tools than what I did it in
[19:33] Aww Matto is such a cutie Heart emoji Heart emoji Heart emoji
[19:47] [Matt laughs] My second question, is also why? This is also my favorite thing
[20:03] Lamar with sexyback spell applied But If I did, I want him to be just like you
[20:16] [Simeon] Hello Lamar! in Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged like 15 years ago Like, every time this guy appears on screen, this plays
[20:32] History is just a circle, it all comes back around Cheap parlor tricks are extremely erotic Almost as old as that song Sexy Back came out in 2006
[20:50] If my math is correct, that's like, a long time ago Eepy Matto Okay, did not see that coming
[21:04] I shouldn't allowed access to the internet Awful! Simply awful! But this car, I can do the exact same thing
[21:18] WHAT? THERE AREN’T COUGARS IN ROCKET LEAGUE! No clue!
[21:32] I have played Rocket League before, when it first came out in 2015, over ten years ago Matto, you are not going to say anything about this?
[21:50] makes the most sense to be hung up in some sort of art exhibition value $107,500
[22:06] [Reading chat] Do we not have a sitting emote? It's actually one of my favorite emotes and I think we should add it
[22:19] Let's do this! There's snow way his delusional ahh thinks he's funny That roast was certainly ice cold
[22:33] Snow way he actually pulled the house down Wait, that doesn't work Umm... Snowleto Bay
[22:46] This is snow time for jokes I must beat my children Michael changed his name to De Santa because it sounds like Santa
[23:00] And that's like snow thing We're stealing ice Get it?
[23:15] You remember in that movie when he was like “ice to meet you” They produce all this white stuff
[23:29] That's pretty n-ice You missed a snow-lot
[23:43] I'm sick of snowy-shores Well, I'll kill them another time [Lester] -Cut of the jewel store take to your account
[23:56] You mean the ice store take How do you get the snail on GTA PlayStation?
[24:08] It's in the Constitution But thank you My snow puns are...
[24:24] [Reading comment] He isn't funny which is funny They’re just jokes! Mikey, how you doing?
[24:50] [Amanda] Michael calm down Before I scroll down, I thought to myself, what if I did a thing [Reading comment] New challenge idea
[25:04] No! Palou leading from McLaughlin 14!
[25:16] I think a lot of people have no idea where it's from, whenever it comes up During the Reddit Recap
[25:32] There's no way they're going to make the heist grind to 50 mil If you're gonna f*ck my wife, you better do it for free And $50 million
[25:49] Why? Rockstar? Why? but they made it so the heist pays out nothing!
[26:01] it may as well be 100 million Based off normal amount that heists give
[26:14] Bro: Why am I not getting matches on dating apps Who wouldn't love this? Bro is still handsome just for a different era
[26:27] [Matt laughs] What the f*ck is this? This is E This is sideways this is an E, this is not W
[26:41] Why does he sleep like this on stream? He is happy now
[26:53] Terrible camera angle Matto has infinite meme potential
[27:05] Random a*se kid who's staring at me A remix I made, full song You disingenuous dense motherf*cker
[27:19] tie your sho- You disingenuous dense motherf*cker Obviously you have to know something about something or you couldn't, Disingenuous!
[27:34] You disingenuous dense motherf*cker! ...motherf*cker Dense!
[27:47] THERE AREN’T COUGARS IN MISSIONS! THIS IS MILLIONS TO ONE!
[28:02] You disingenuous, dense motherf*cker You disingenuous, dense motherf*cker Dense motherf*cker!
[28:18] Good as this is, been like five years with those memes man Intie, you got some talent there DarkViperAU grinding heists, contact missions and more
[28:35] completing them for career progress every day for six months to get them done They called me a madman and they did! Matto being mean to a poor kid
[28:50] [Chat TTS] Matto my grandmother unfortunately passed away two months ago I've taken up hitting my hookah to cope with the pain when I was helping my little sister with her homework
[29:04] Car blow Kaboom That sounds tragic [Matt laughs]
[29:17] I mean, it could happen Those bazooka attacks are all too common nowadays How did he not see it? Rolling eyes emoji
[29:30] Oh wait wait wait I did a full circle? I didn't see it? [Chat TTS] I got divorced the other day by my sister [Matt laughs]
[29:49] Huh? There aren't boars in cutscenes!
[30:06] Aitana would be disappointed Okay, so Venezuela is... Venezuela has to be somewhere in this region
[30:22] I don't know NO! STOP!
[30:37] I'll do Play Geography again I will, I will ace it because people shouldn't watch that Is Paris in Italy?
[30:51] Michael De Santa as part of his witness protections cheme NO- He did go into witness protection
[31:06] Witness protection is a very rigid system He isn't and wasn't He even says it himself when talking to Lester on Casing The Jewel Store
[31:19] he’s law enforcement wouldn't want anyone but him and then going into witness protection it doesn't make sense
[31:31] Well, it was unofficial witness protection I mean, he's not wrong, but like, Michael's just lying
[31:46] It's like being an unofficial lawyer where you don't have You're not a lawyer
[31:58] You're either officially a lawyer or you're not a lawyer 100% of all DarkViperAU fans have an IQ higher than 250
[32:12] IQ tests are built using a bell curve where 100 is the set middle point DarkViperAU scores above 250 I don't think that's even possible
[32:25] That's like so many standard deviations away Dviperpew Very cute
[32:39] Twins at the carousel meme Matt's version Y'all f*ck with this trend, right? It was everywhere
[32:52] and I saw Garchomp versus Sylveon one I understand nothing about this, but I appreciate the effort that went into it Thank you everyone who submitted stuff for the subreddit
[33:08] I appreciate all the support you guys give me I will continue to do my best to do meme worthy things Keep in mind, there are over 1100 GIFs now of me
[33:21] that have gotten like half a billion views collectively If you want to communicate to some- someone- They're always the best for it
[33:33] Thank you for watching Boop!