Drunkest Judge Ever

[00:00] Have you ever been so inebriated that you tinkle your britches? Hmm, interesting. Have you ever been so drunk that not only do you wee-wee your trousers, but you also happen to be a federal judge who is operating a motor vehicle at the time of the urination

[00:15] after crashing through multiple signs without even realizing that that's happened, and then avoid jail time as well? I don't think so. I feel like that might be exclusive to Thomas Ludington here, whose body cam dropped a couple months ago,

[00:28] was showing just how super drunk, which is an actual term, by the way, he was while operating this vehicle that could have led to not only the death of himself, but the death of innocent people. Again, he hit signs, but those could have just as easily been people.

[00:41] But we have to remember, this is a geriatric fossil who happens to be a federal judge, so obviously he's not going to get any real punishment. So he got the lightest slap on the tuchus with some probation.

[00:53] And wouldn't you believe it, sports fans, Thomas Luddington couldn't even do that right. He's already, in less than three weeks since this ruling, failed to submit for his alcohol and drug tests.

[01:05] And I still don't believe he's even going to get any consequences for that. They're teasing the idea that maybe he spends a brief stay in the slammer, but I honestly don't even think that'll happen.

[01:17] It's just so fucking ridiculous. Anyway, let's take a peek at Thomas Ludington's Turbo Drunk Driving Body Cam. The term that they use is super drunk, by the way.

[01:29] Central, Central, Central, 41. I don't know. Take a look at this side.

[01:44] Sir, can you get out of the vehicle or is your door stuck? Nope. I can get out. Dude's driving around like bubble boy here. Every single airbag that's ever existed has all just blown up all at once in this guy's vehicle,

[01:57] and he's still driving that bitch around, having no idea that anything's even awry. He is so drunk, this guy probably thinks he's in a space shuttle right now. I'm not exactly sure why.

[02:13] We support it. You're not sure why? No. Okay. Well, the side of your car would indicate you struck something. Thanks, later. Okay.

[02:25] Let me do a favor and walk around the back of your car, okay? What seems to be the problem, officer? Oh, the airbag deployment. Yeah, I'm as confused on that as you guys are. We're all thinking the same thing, right?

[02:38] How could these airbags deploy when there's clearly no damage to my vehicle? A curious case. Quite the conundrum, isn't it? As you can see, the vehicle is fucking chewed up and spit out. and tons of damage from hitting the signs that he blasted through.

[02:53] But he's like, oh, yeah, I don't know what's going on here. It's so odd. Must be some kind of manufacturing error. I don't know why he's deployed. Okay. Just do me a favor. Turn to stop, stop, stop, stop.

[03:05] Turn around. Right here. Back to your car. Yep. Back to your car. Step over to the back of your car. Yep. Okay. Put your butt against the back of your car. I'm over there. Put your butt right here. Okay.

[03:17] Okay. Perfect. Hey, what's your name? My name is Tom. Tom, how much did you have to drink today? Uh, nothing's right. Nothing. No. Okay, did you take anything? Did you take any medications?

[03:32] No. Tom hit the sauce really hard. So, spoiler alert, he is hammered. This dude is plastered so much so that he peed himself. So that's where you're going to see his lower body is censored.

[03:45] He's not hanging dong there. he's not, you know, fucking in his birthday suit downstairs or anything. It's because he peed himself, so I guess they had to blur that. And I'll go ahead and give you the big reveal on his BAC.

[03:58] It was a .27. And you can see he is not handling that well. His body's at war with that alcohol in there. It feels like it on the verge of shutting down the way he cannot like listen to any of what the officers are saying nor can he actually move his body overly effectively So like as they were telling him to get against the car it wasn registering with him

[04:21] He's fucking lagging. So they basically had to, like, move him there themselves manually because he couldn't do it all natural anymore. So they had, throughout this whole interaction, he literally cannot process anything of what they're saying,

[04:36] nor can he, like, actually pilot his own body throughout the talking because he is so drunk. Okay. Well, you're in an accident here. Destruction signs. Your vehicle was called in.

[04:49] You have full airbag deployment, so it tells me you suck something, right? Yep. I'm actually a federal judge. Okay. It's always incredible to me how every single person in a position of power when they get pulled over by the police on at least most of the body cams I've seen

[05:03] instantly try and use that to, like, weasel their way out of it. So this guy is slyly mentioning, actually, I'm a federal judge because he's under the impression that this might just get him off of this instantly.

[05:16] But it didn't, not immediately. That had to come later when the corruption really got to take place. Take one step away from your vehicle for me. Away from your vehicle for me.

[05:29] Step toward me in one step. Toward me in one step. Okay, very good. All right, so you're going to put your feet together for me. Yep. Put your hands by your side. Okay. Do you see my finger? Look at my finger, okay?

[05:41] You're looking at me. I need you to look at my finger. Yeah. Okay? Yep. All right. I want you to follow my finger with your eyes, without moving your head. Okay? You understand that? Yep. Okay. I need you to look at my finger. Yeah. All right?

[05:53] And follow my finger. I understand. Okay. All right. I need you to follow with my finger. Yep. Okay? Yep. Alright, you're not tracking my finger.

[06:08] That's why you're looking at me. Well, you're looking at my finger for me, alright? Yeah. Look at that. Can you see the finger? Okay. Track my finger with your eyes without moving your head. Yes, sir.

[06:22] Alright, you're moving your head. I need to move the track. Alright, not doing that at all. Smash that one. He aced it. that was expertly done.

[06:35] Holy Toledo. This guy hits the Kovacs aim lab, I'll tell you what. So Tom over here really putting on a strong showing for being sober. I'll drop this. I don't even know why I'm bothering to be sarcastic here.

[06:48] It's just actually just despicable. So Tom is so fucking drunk, he couldn't even figure out how to step forward towards the officer until like the 10th time he asked him to do so. And he still didn't even understand what like the tracking the finger meant. He instead just kept locking eyes romantically with the officer,

[07:03] and every time the officer tried to move his finger, he just stayed looking straight through the officer's soul. And then only once did he notice the finger and then follow it. And the officer recognized this was going nowhere. It was like trying to teach a dog to do a backflip.

[07:17] This just wasn't landing, so he just says, look, you're not doing this at all. So instead they move on to a different field sobriety test because this one was a bit of a dud. All right, I can't walk. No, no, sir. I want you to follow my instructions. I'll tell you when to begin. Right?

[07:34] Once you imagine that straight line right there, okay? Once you place your left foot on that line, once you place your right foot in front of your left foot, we can deal with that from your toe. Can you do that for me? I think so. No, sir. I want you to watch my... Okay.

[07:48] All right, sir. I want you to just wait right here. I want you to step up back up against your car. I want you to lean against your car for me. Another one of the books, Thomas. One of the best walkers on the planet. You see the way he does that with just authority. He invented walking.

[08:01] Holy Toledo. Thomas, I've never seen someone sober or drunk walk so effectively, so confidently. See the way he held his chin high like that? Bam.

[08:13] You're looking at a savant. So the officer's trying to explain to him like the next one's going to be walking a straight line. But Thomas is like, all right, now walk. And he like giving commands to his body to follow like voice commands in SoCom like the old SOCOM game on the PlayStation 2 So he starts walking up and he like wait just no wait we haven even started yet

[08:34] And he's like, all right, you're right, you're right. And now I walk. And he does it again and starts his waddle. So then the officer, he just, he calls that one pretty quickly. He recognizes that was going nowhere.

[08:46] A really interesting speed run strategy here, though, from Thomas, that's a gold split. But he actually sequence broke this. I haven't seen that before. He may have just changed the meta for speed running field sobriety tests, I got to tell you.

[08:59] No, I can't understand what's happening here. Well, I'll show you real quick. There you go, this Scooby-Doo and the crew out there, Thomas. You're right. We're all confused on how those airbags deployed.

[09:11] It's just not adding up. It's not making any sense. Yeah. You see the damage to the side of your vehicle? Yeah. Okay, was this here when you started to drive up? No. It was not. No. Okay. And we had a report that your vehicle struck some signs on the road about a mile back that way.

[09:27] Okay? Which would explain your airbag deployment. You're in Emmett? Yeah, on this road, about a mile back that way. I can't explain it.

[09:39] You have no memory hitting the sign? No. Well, in that case, Thomas, there's only one realistic explanation here. a burglar must have broken into Thomas' car, kidnapping him,

[09:51] dosing him with amnesia juice or forgetful liquid, and then took it on a joyride, blasting signs, causing the damage, panicking, freaking out, leaving, and then staging Thomas in the driver's seat

[10:03] all without his knowledge. It's an elaborate frame job. So, the question then remains, who's the real perpetrator? We got a maniac on the loose, and we got to catch them, Thomas. You gotta think, think, really dig deep.

[10:16] Who did this? Which one of the scoundrels out there broke into your car and busted through a bunch of signs and then framed you for it? Can you pick a number between 19 and 21 for me?

[10:32] Can you pick a number between 19 and 21? Yeah, this is hard. I mean, why? What would be the question I'm trying to assess? I thought he was 15. Okay.

[10:44] I think I actually busted out laughing when he said that. I've never seen this in a field sobriety test before. Pick a number between 19 and 21. And I thought that he was just, like, fooling around and just having fun now at this point

[10:58] because it's so clear that this guy is hammered. But it's even further evidence to just how drunk this guy is because they haven't been able to do the breathalyzer because he was chewing gum, which I guess is, like, an issue when doing the breathalyzer,

[11:10] so instead they've had to wait, which is why they showed him the damage on the car to, you know, poke him around about, like, well, how did this happen? And in the meantime, while doing that and still waiting for the breathalyzer, he asked this question, and the guy's like, whoa, it's kind of hard.

[11:26] I mean, it is a brain buster, a number between 19 and 21. Shit, bro, there's too many options to pick from. Oh, man, is this some kind of magic trick, some kind of weird riddle? And then the guy says 15.

[11:38] so like honestly kind of a galaxy brain little field sobriety test like I never heard that but that goes kind of hard this guy is so

[11:50] fucked up and according to him he's been driving for over three hours do you know how many people's lives were in jeopardy for over three hours with this guy who can't even answer the most basic question

[12:02] imaginable behind the wheel of a vehicle like this he's already hit multiple times but who's to say he didn't also cause other mayhem across his three and a half hour expedition. That is some frightening, scary

[12:14] shit. What I want you to do is I want you to recite your ABCs for me without singing, beginning with C and ending with Q. You can begin when you're ready.

[12:26] A-B-C-C-E-C-E-S-U Alright, here we go. U-A-C-E-S-U-R-O-C-E-S-U Alright sir Every time I watch that one it gets better and better So without thinking recite your ABCs

[12:47] Thomas? You nailed it, brother. Crush that one. Like, I don't think we need any more evidence to confirm how drunk this guy is.

[13:00] He's also said that it's not medications or anything. He doesn't take any medications. there's only one culprit left here and it's ye olde alcohol in his system but these I haven't seen these two field sobriety tests

[13:14] done before and like I said I thought he was just taking the piss at first but it's clear the piss is just in Thomas' pants these are effective FSTs because he is failing the fuck out of them he is flunking hard

[13:26] he can't even do his ABCs and then when he tries to desperately start singing them And all hell breaks loose as well. 411, I was going to say, okay.

[13:38] So, what the hell are you doing? I'm arresting you for jobless operating under the influence. Well, you are very clearly intoxicated. They tried to revisit the breathalyzer, but Thomas tried to get a little tricky on him.

[13:51] So he wasn't exactly following the directions or doing it properly. Eventually, it does end with them arresting him for driving while intoxicated, which I think is pretty clear evidence to support that. and then they did actually get his BAC, which was the 0.27.

[14:06] I have to say that I am disappointed in myself for having in front of you this morning. I apologize to the news, and I also apologize to all the other drivers that I shared with,

[14:19] which will not happen yet. Huntington was arrested in October of last year for drunk driving. According to the prosecutor, at the time of his arrest, Huntington's blood alcohol content level was 0.270, which under Michigan law falls under a super drunk charge.

[14:33] I don't know if it's just me, but it sounded like he was slurring his words during that as well. I feel like he was already fucking drunk by the time he was trying to make that apology to everyone there about like, you know, this is so disappointing. I can't believe that. Oh my goodness.

[14:45] What in tarnation? I don't know what came over me there. Like it sounds like he's still drunk. Like probably since that arrest, he just hasn't had a day of sobriety. But maybe it was just the audio quality. I don't really know. But yeah, under the Michigan laws there,

[15:00] super drunk charges. It was misdemeanor charges and no prison time. Instead, they just wanted to make sure he stopped drinking alcohol. I think that it is more than appropriate for the court

[15:13] to place your observation to make sure that you are continuing to have seen for alcohol. I just don't think that's enough. I don't know why we're taking this so lightly here. He was super drunk driving and in doing so, hit two signs that we know of. It could have been

[15:29] a lot more chaos out there across his journey that we just don't know about, that wasn't reported. This is something that should be taken far more seriously, but instead it's just alright, this was pretty embarrassing,

[15:41] this was no good, so we need to make sure that you abstain from alcohol going for it, okay? And that's the punishment. That doesn't make any fucking sense. It's like, it's because he is a federal judge.

[15:53] I mean, everyone knows exactly why he's getting no punishment. A normal person would get some serious punishment, I imagine. Though sometimes, if the person also has extenuating circumstances, aka money, they can get away

[16:05] with it too sometimes. But, in a lot of cases, a normal person doing the exact same thing this judge did is not going to be getting this kind of sentencing. It's just complete fuckery. This is

[16:17] just so outrageous. He was a danger to himself and everyone on the road, knowingly drunk driving, super drunk driving, excuse me, let me use the proper nomenclature. And he doesn't get any consequences for it at all? Other than, I guess, like, the

[16:32] shame and the embarrassment of how stupid he looks in the body cam? It's just not right. It's so ridiculous. And like I said, he couldn't even follow through with the demands of the probation, which is just submitting for the drug and alcohol test twice weekly. He already

[16:47] failed that. So yeah, I just wanted to yap about this. That's really about it. See ya.