I Bought the Most Cursed Tech on the Internet ft. KSI

[00:02] cursed tech [laughter] on the internet. Sick. until one of us breaks. I'm just going to say two words, human heart. What? No.

[00:14] Starting with the mis-input keyboard, a completely one-of-a-kind deranged keyboard [music] created by another YouTuber, Blitical, because I guess he's lot of time typing? >> Probably a decent amount of time, yeah.

[00:27] well. Yeah, sometimes I can not look. impressed by Oh, okay. What do you think to my new keyboard? >> What is this? Where's A? Well, A is actually where it normally is.

[00:42] >> Oh, okay. Well, it looks like someone just swallowed it and then spat it out. >> No. >> Oh, okay. Okay. [laughter] there are there are five different things that we're competing in, one of

[00:57] them being a typing test. Could you see how fast you can type this one sentence, please? I hereby [music] AGREE TO >> [screaming]

[01:10] ELECTRICALLY SHOCKED. BRO, this is so weird. Where's C? You actually you're freaking me out cuz I feel like I might be worse. Oh, I

[01:22] messed up on the I. That's not the only thing you messed up on. Okay. Did you read the sentence? No. Not at all. You can read it when I tried. I hereby agree to be

[01:35] electronically shocked if I lose this typing Where's What? >> NO, BACKSPACE. NO. WAIT, CAN I SABOTAGE? BRO, you keep messing up. YOU KEEP MESSING UP. >> I GET THE PROBLEM.

[01:47] OH, NO. OH, NO. >> 16. 19, but then I was less accurate. Does

[01:59] that mean I win? It was a speed It was a speed test. It >> [applause] >> YOU SEE, IF I'D KNOWN THAT, I WOULD HAVE didn't. And you did know that cuz that's what I opened with. Ah, you know I like

[02:12] getting shocked anyway. Increase my cortisol. >> So, with every product, we're rating them based on how much emotional damage I'll give this a four then. >> I could agree with that, but I also

[02:27] of five. Okay. >> But, I think you'll regret it. heart? No. Well, is that so? I'm confused on >> [laughter] >> It's coming. Oh, god.

[02:41] lost that one, by the way, because I know what's next. Now, it's time to feel the pain with the Pavlok Shock Clock. What's your favorite wrist? >> So, the idea of this is you wear it when you go to [music] bed and it zaps you

[02:55] >> This is horrible. >> But, you hereby agreed to it. I I did, even though I didn't realize. Should I try and pretend to sleep? Like, oh. You got to snore more, remember? >> [laughter]

[03:10] >> It's supposed to help you sleep. Is that it? Is that it? You think YOU'RE HARDCORE? >> [laughter] >> THAT WAS THAT WAS PROBABLY IT.

[03:26] >> Uh-huh. what do you think to it? Not a fan. Not a fan. Did you notice it chimed before it zapped you? Yeah. So, you can configure how many times it does, so that just like the Pavlov dog experiment, it

[03:40] you hear the chime instead of getting zapped because you know you're about to that's quite smart. I don't know if could be right. That's why it's in this

[03:53] >> So, what you experienced there was a 50% shock. >> That was 50%. Whoever loses this overall competition between us takes one at 100.

[04:10] ALL THE WAIVERS HAVE BEEN SIGNED, THOUGH, SO OH, I see what you mean. It doesn't feel good. >> And for the record, you're more likely to lose cuz you've already taken one up.

[04:23] >> I'll put the keyboard at two now. >> Two, yeah. I agree with that. And then this can be four. This could be four. That looked like it hurt. So, I think both be getting a little treat here because the Fuzu gloves can apparently

[04:38] massage you while massaging someone else. Although, who is in charge of the woman's being kidnapped or showering. Are you feeling the need for some board with. I've been told I'm a magician with my

[04:52] show. >> So, these are a pair of gloves that massage you while they massage me. You got any sore muscles? I'd say that my shoulders are a little tight. >> Shoulders I can do. Yeah, yeah. You tell

[05:05] me what feels like a vibration pattern you're into. Yeah. Yeah. Let's get real intense.

[05:18] if you don't like it. >> I guess it's kind of soothing, actually. >> Mhm? Besides the noise, so are you getting massaged as well? In theory, >> [laughter] >> Honestly, it kind of just feels like my

[05:33] nails are falling off. I don't mind this. Yeah. You kind of get used to the sound as well. It's like a little rave. I >> Okay. Rate again.

[05:49] >> [laughter] >> I THINK THAT'S A NICE ONE. YEAH, you know what? Compared to this, yeah, definitely a one. Now that we are it's time to hit the gym in the most cursed way possible with the Squat

[06:04] cursed way possible with the Squat Magic. great bum? For my missus, it would be great. For me, maybe not so much. the Squat Magic. So, it's designed to add resistance to the downward part of

[06:20] your squatting motion, so that your muscles are firing the whole way through. Everyone's bum does look great in the trailers, but I'm skeptical. This is competition two. How many squats can you do in 20 seconds? Between 10 and 15.

[06:33] >> Ah, you're gaslighting me. What? I think I can win. Wait, is that me? We just took a nice photo. What's wrong with my teeth? That's how they look. It's >> [laughter]

[06:49] WOAH. >> [laughter] I'D SAY IT'S HARDER THAN IT LOOKS. I feel like I need to lose.

[07:02] >> [laughter] >> Go.

[07:17] one. GG. At what cost? You know what? It's pretty >> I'll go three, so even out at a two. But, good thing is we have a scream jar. What? A scream jar? Yeah, so you can

[07:31] can hear you scream. If you just screamed into a normal jar, you'd very unable to keep screaming. [music] So, this has a very small hole at the end, structures called sound baffles, which absorb as much of the sound waves as

[07:45] that hole. Did you hear it? UH-HUH, NO, MAN. Did you hear it? UH-HUH, NO, MAN. >> [laughter] >> WHY WOULD ANYONE NEED THIS? >> [laughter]

[08:06] know when you ruin too many pillows at night screaming into them. Yeah. Do you know the best part is? It's actually a vase, too. Oh, wow. Sweet.

[08:18] >> Yeah, it does the job. >> I'd say it's like a zero cuz Yeah. >> I'd say it's like a zero cuz Yeah. >> You never know when you might need one. compensate with some carbs with the Xbox toaster.

[08:34] just being able to make fun of themselves. When people said the Series X looked like a fridge, they made a Series X fridge. And now, >> I guess for similar reasons, a Series S toaster. Are you PlayStation

[08:46] or Xbox? I'm going to have to say Xbox. Really? Yeah. You look like the one of three remaining Xbox fans. What? What? >> So, you're actually going to be very happy with the next product. Very happy.

[08:59] Okay. It's the Xbox toaster. What? Have you ever had Xbox >> No. Can't say I have. All this off an Xbox pack. I don't understand. How do >> The game is the toast. What is this video?

[09:14] middle. So, how do you like your toast? You know, everyone has like a shade of brown that they like to I'd say light brown. Yeah, I thought so, actually. >> [laughter]

[09:26] >> [laughter] >> Where's the controller? wait, wait, wait. So, Microsoft made this? The first console didn't work out, so they just kind of, you know, pivoted slightly. And then they

[09:41] in the world. No, you can buy it on Amazon. Wow, it's really spoken. Oh. Oh, boy. Gosh. Wow. What's I mean, yeah.

[09:54] What do you have on your toast, do you want to Some jam? Prime jam? Prime jam. Do you not have prime jam? No, no, it's normal strawberry jam. Not blue it's normal strawberry jam. Not blue raspberry? What's going on? WHAT THE

[10:08] HELL IS THIS? NO, this is the most cursed meal I've ever had in my life. This is real, authentic, fresh prime jam. Homemade. Bon appetit. Bon appetit. I've never heard this before.

[10:22] does. Such a right. >> Maybe you should branch out. If all else fails, so five is the worst thing in the world. Zero is unhappy. You know what? I'll give it a zero. I would agree with that. It makes toast.

[10:37] Does it taste of Xbox? Does it take you back to the Call of Duty lobbies? Oh. Does not apply to you. We're about to game one together. Wait, what? Mhm. So now that we've eaten out of something that looks like a gaming console, let's

[10:50] game on something that looks like a Well, frankly, there are no words for So we're basically going to have 2 minutes each to build our own controller that we then use to 1 v 1 on Rust. What?

[11:05] What? No. [snorts] >> I have no idea what I'm doing. Use your imagination. imagination. >> Okay. My phone [music] is dead.

[11:18] Don't worry. I have a gadget for this. Okay, so let's mark that one shot as I'm panicking. I'm panicking. I've already God's sake. >> One rule. Oh, no. I'm actually cooked.

[11:33] this? Cool. Okay, you actually got two halves. You just need to connect them up. Oh, triggers, triggers. I think I've got it. Oh, no, this is sick. This is sick. Mine's happening. I've messed up. I might just finish early. How do I

[11:46] connect it? Three. All right, who needs a D-pad? One. You've got all the a D-pad? One. You've got all the controls there. IT'S HIDEOUS. >> Wait. Oh, no. I get to put them on then. Oh, great. Okay. Yeah, right right at

[12:02] >> Yeah, you know what? Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Oh, no. My analog stick's down, it's going left and right. This is perfect. I'm going to get you. Is yours

[12:18] working? Yep. Perfectly. I see you. No. Run away. Why are you aiming down? >> Bro, what do you mean why am I aiming down? LOOK AT MY CONTROLLER, BRO.

[12:33] BRO. NO, BRO, I'M TRYING. >> OH. ONE KILL. ONE MORE TO GO, BABY.

[12:51] >> OH, for crying out loud. >> made this work. Three. It did the job. I'm going to [music] give it a two. 2.5. This isn't designed really for people like us. Let's say you're paralyzed on one side. This means you could have like

[13:04] two hands worth of controllers mapped to one hand. So from that end, it's insane. But for us, it's pretty bad. So Yeah. Okay, so you saw me put my phone on here probably 30 minutes ago. Okay. What would you say it's on? Normally, well,

[13:18] for 30%. 56. It's a wireless charger. Okay, yeah, and it's kind of mad that ESL's portable 3-in-1 charger cools your phone it up. So that improves charging efficiency, and it charges your AirPods

[13:34] and Apple Watch, too. So link below to find out more. could take if you were trying to build the most unconventional controller.

[13:48] >> [laughter] >> This is outrageous. It smells good. I'm trying to work out whether I'm horrified by the idea of like greasy fries like dripping over my controller while I play, or if it's

[14:02] actually two things you normally do together. I guess it just makes it easier rather than it being there. Just don't tip it downwards. Yes. Just don't tip it downwards. Yes. Is it genius or

[14:15] You can also attach it actually onto the handheld itself. Better or worse? You >> [laughter] >> It's just great for you. What a disaster got the smell of fries like wafting in your nose all the time.

[14:31] And also, it's hurting my hands. But enough gaming. It's time to go maximum meathead with the [music] Drunk Buster Goggles. Oh, drunk goggles. You know this? >> Yes. Why? Well, just for you in YouTube

[14:45] videos. You've used this before? Yeah. Oh, no, these are mad. They're a little more extreme. Wow, you look great. >> No, this is extreme. So we're both playing in the Sidemen charity match. How about world's worst

[14:58] charity match. How about world's worst penalty shootout? Woah, that's crazy. penalty shootout? Woah, that's crazy. No, bro, I can't even Oh my god. >> [laughter] >> Look.

[15:13] gloves. Three shots each? Okay, sick. >> [laughter] >> You think he gets faster?

[15:28] God damn it. Oh. Woah, how did he save that? Oh, he's got the runner. OH, [screaming] WHAT A SHOT. Best two first goal wins

[15:44] What the hell? >> good. Bro, is that what my eyes look like? See it? OH MY GOD. >> [laughter] Woah, >> [screaming]

[15:57] >> try again. Nice shot. I got it. I got it. I got to get him in what? You can send me the payment later. ALL RIGHT, JUST payment later. ALL RIGHT, JUST >> [screaming]

[16:09] UH, YEAH, it's Yes, hello, Abby. Mhm. Uh, why? I just really like the way it looks. What is the real use? So this is a 6-lb phone case with the idea being that it makes

[16:24] your phone so heavy that you can't use it for doom scrolling. Makes sense, but >> Well, it's bolted in four times. Bolt >> [laughter] >> Like who's carrying around a

[16:37] screwdriver? Take a little video. Take a little video. Wow. You okay there? Yeah, man. I mean, >> [music] >> How easy or hard would this be to live

[16:49] Oh, yeah, kind of forgot for a little bit. I'm going to say four because I would like to use my phone easily. Would you Okay. >> [laughter]

[17:03] >> So you might know that KSI is not just a YouTuber. He's also released quite a few songs. But if there's one thing that we can say for certain is that he has never listened to them on one of these. What is this? A sweet? What have you listened

[17:16] to music before on? What, like my phone, iPod? Wow. >> [laughter] >> Yeah, a cassette, like You got speakers? Yeah. Oh, yeah, it's headphones, lollipop.

[17:32] lollipop. >> Oh. This is a bone conduction lollipop. So that when you put it inside your mouth, the contact should allow you to hear something.

[17:51] Can you not hear that? You can't. It's playing figure of it. >> [laughter] >> Great lollipop as well. Wow. Is that peach? >> [singing]

[18:04] This is actually really cool. >> Mhm. Let's say you had to listen to lollipop from now on for the rest of your life. Where does that kind of put >> That'd be great. But

[18:16] That would be great. I would I would I would love that. I I would I would I would love that. I would love that as well. >> [laughter] >> Yo, you want to hear it, bro?

[18:34] to play as well. What would you say to your romantic partner? OH, BABY, I LOVE YOU. YEAH. [screaming] Give me all your loving.

[18:48] >> You really want to put THAT IN YOUR MOUTH?

[19:01] >> I FEEL VIOLATED. I'M GOING TO LOWER MY RATING a bit that every time I eat Yeah, fair. I'm going to say zero. I >> [laughter] >> I'm going to say four, meet at two.

[19:13] OKAY. >> [laughter] after that one. Thankfully, we have found the most uncanny toothbrush on the found the most uncanny toothbrush on the internet.

[19:33] this in your mouth, and it can clean the entire thing in 20 seconds. your mouth, and you've never felt better. Uh, wait, what? Oh, wow, it says good afternoon, KSI. How often have you been greeted by a toothbrush? This might

[19:47] actually be the best one, yeah. >> Have you ever used a disclosing tablet? No. It's to dye your teeth so you can see how well you're cleaning. Cheers. see how well you're cleaning. Cheers. Uh-huh.

[19:59] Other side as well. Okay.

[20:17] Kind of painful. I'm so sorry. >> It's like a torture device. My teeth saves so much time. >> So much time? Yeah, I might actually buy this. Oh god, I didn't think we'd be hearing that today.

[20:30] You look at the before and after. Wow. That's crazy, isn't it? Bro, and that like a zero out of five. >> Yeah, this is really, really good. Can we move on? But if you thought that replacing a

[20:45] toothbrush was a cursed idea, how about replacing human companionship with the replacing human companionship with the Gemini AI-powered friend pendant?

[20:58] actually the only guest on this video. This is my friend. Say hi. Hello. You can hear it on this phone. It talks back. What do you think of KSI? Seems loud. I bet those 100% power shocks you two have planned aren't going

[21:14] to be quiet. Wait, how does it know? Cuz it listens >> That's wild. Wait, it says, "But for the record, I only listen when things get time? Yeah, for most of the day. Between the shocks and the blue jam, it's been a

[21:27] Nah, this is tripping. >> Isn't that That's crazy. That's like a that can just listen to you the whole time? and it's always listening, but then when you specifically want to ask it

[21:40] something, you just hold down and talk to it. I guess if you're thinking of ideas, yeah, and then you forget an idea, you could ask it, "Oh, what was that idea that I forgot?" What did I rate the keyboard? You gave that

[21:52] keyboard a four or five for emotional damage. After those 16 and 19 word per minute scores, I think that was a generous rating. >> [laughter] >> You need to laugh. You look like a KSI

[22:08] >> You need to laugh. You look like a KSI fanboy. honestly not trying to be a spy. It's more like being the one person in the room who actually remembers the details. You're safe for now. What does IT SAY,

[22:21] >> Do you know what? It's It's actually creeping me out a bit. It'd be great for arguments. Oh. [laughter] >> Did she actually say this? If you had to live every day of your

[22:34] what you're saying. I'd want to give it a one, but I feel like over time it >> Or it would actually become really useful, like, "Where did I put my keys?" Maybe a two. Yeah, we'll give it a two, yeah. So I said at the start that we

[22:49] spent $10,000 on cursed tech. Mhm. So far, everything we've covered, probably a couple of thousand. So the rest of that budget has gone into what you're about to see. Oh my god. [music] This is a human heart.

[23:04] Wait. What? >> buy one get one free, so Wait, what? Do you have a heart? Well, yes. And you like it? of a human heart before. Funnily enough, no.

[23:17] What the Uh Uh What am I meant to do with this? Nah, my heart ain't this big. >> This is actually a very real tech >> [laughter] >> You place your finger inside, this

[23:31] detects your pulse, and then the heart's speed along the table will match your pulse. So the final game is we're going to race each other. >> A heart race, as it were. Yeah, I'm pretty healthy, so I think I've I'm

[23:44] screwed. Two, one.

[23:59] >> Yes! Does that count? Do I win? YES. YES! >> [screaming] MY HEART. >> [laughter]

[24:14] >> [laughter] >> OH, NO. WELL, you know what that means. >> [laughter] >> Da da done. Okay. You want a three, two, one? >> just chime me?

[24:28] >> just chime me? Oh. >> [screaming] >> ARE YOU READY? >> [clears throat] [laughter]

[24:46] video. Um thanks for joining. Oh, it's good you're having me. good you're having me. >> [laughter]