Putting Delusion to the Test

[00:01] year than I ever have in my life. And throughout many of the matches, I thought to myself, "Wow, these goalkeepers are trash. I could have saved that." Which I recognize how uh irrational that

[00:17] is, especially considering I've never played goalkeeper or anything. Even when I did actively play soccer for years, it was not in goal. But I couldn't help but have that little devil on my shoulder whispering those sweet nothings in my

[00:31] ear about how I could have been the hero there. So I told my friends in confidence this that I felt I could have saved a lot of these shots. And I was very upfront about never being able to save any PKs. I know for a fact that was

[00:45] just not in the cards for me, especially given my apprehension to injuries. Like all times, which is why I move around like a geriatric old man. So I knew diving was already going to be hard. But I still felt I could save a lot of

[00:59] what I saw there. They wanted to put it to the test. So we got together with a professional and went to the rowdies facility here so I could learn and see facility here so I could learn and see how I'd do in net. Spoiler alert,

[01:13] as I anticipated, diving was was very hard for me. Basically non-existent. I could only do like falling over like during the drills. And it's not just me. Diving in net is [ __ ] terrifying. So,

[01:28] on the other channel, Matt, Aaron, and Chase also went in net, and not a single one of them dove either, by the way. Like, it's it's a very hard thing to do. of the entire group, statistically speaking. Also, even as a professional

[01:44] goalie, penalty kicks are just [ __ ] brutal to try and save. Like even against amateurs like us, I haven't kicked a soccer ball since middle school, maybe early high school. And even I was able to squeak in a couple

[01:57] stinkers on Jeff in that with PKs. >> You taught me everything you knew. Time >> You taught me everything you knew. Time to use it against you. >> The hands hurt a little. >> Oh, yeah.

[02:11] >> Oh, yeah. >> I can see the steam coming off of them. Oh. >> So, I think penalty kicks are just a [ __ ] coin flip. You got to guess correctly. And if you don't, even diving

[02:23] makes it hard cuz it's not like I was sending like a [ __ ] 200 mph meteor towards the net. It's just that that shit's brutal. And I knew that going into it. Like I said, I didn't think I'd be able to stop any penalty kicks, but I

[02:35] was convinced I could at least stop quite a bit of action uh from from making it to the back of the net. Anyway, let me show you how the goalie I learned a lot. >> Hey, hey, superstar athlete Charles

[02:49] here. Um, I was watching the World Cup and every time a goal went in, I thought to myself, I could have stopped that. It is I I recognized very unlikely, but I

[03:02] was very convinced numerous times that had I been in goal, I would have been able to make the triumphant save. I used to play soccer back in middle school. misdeeds out there. >> Now, while it is true I played in middle

[03:15] school, I was on the cover of soccer magazines in elementary school. That's when I was really in my prime soccer form. That was that was me at my highest >> Yeah, I was a a highly soughtafter soccer prospect. They're calling me

[03:31] >> How to >> How to handle crosses on page 34. I wrote the book. There's legends told the story of the the 5'6 Florida man Phenom feeling extremely confident and I'm

[03:46] yourself. played nine years in major league soccer. Uh made three MLS Cups, won a here in 2012, played two years with the Rowdies and I'm in the USFL.

[04:00] who really had an issue with that take and brought out the professionals. >> The exact sentence was, "I really just easy." >> Those I did use that nomenclature. I

[04:17] know easy maybe treated as a slur in in some context. >> I told you he'd pull punches. >> But but I'll say this, confidence is way. Confidence is key. The rest of it's a little bit harder than being

[04:29] >> Perfect. >> How how short was shorter guy do you? >> Uh about 510. >> Okay. That's close. >> Yeah. And then and then how about that 4 foot 10 goalkeeper? Everyone knows that

[04:43] the crossar. >> Well, the goal is 8 by 24, right? So >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> But you know, there's little things like we'll just get you dialed in and then you know it'll be easy.

[04:57] feel like I take up a good amount of space already in there. >> That's true. That's true. I haven't seen >> Okay, now you look like a soccer player with your hair pulled back.

[05:10] >> Yeah, Joseph gave me the Holland. >> You look like kept saying. He was like, "I don't get it. Erling Holland has so many goals. I'd stop all of them." >> I just kept saying, "This guy's so

[05:23] that." >> If I know one thing about Charlie, >> Yeah. If I know one thing about Charlie, it's that when he sees a massive human front of him, he's going to go up and stop that.

[05:36] >> I thought this was a joke or something, but you made me like peeweed shining guards. >> Wait, no, that's not your cup. >> Nice, dude. >> Yeah.

[05:49] difference for you. >> Yeah, cuz now you actually think I can >> Yeah, I do. I'm like, okay, you could actually solve. You're making me believe. >> Well, that's I mean, this is going to

[06:01] >> Well, that's I mean, this is going to catch on soon by the next World Cup. it look cool? >> I know. I think yours looks cool. Yeah. >> I'll let you It's a classic look.

[06:15] >> Retro. I'm too used to hockey. You tuck the jersey. Everybody just makes fun of >> Mostly Danny. >> It's only because your pants are really big, so it looks like we're in a diaper. >> Yeah, true. Like not just mine,

[06:27] >> With the gear on, we were all ready to go. I had my elbow pads, my knee pads. [ __ ] up with dynamite. I was so protected. Now, unfortunately, they didn't get the pyrochnics in our walkout music. So, we did this in pure silence.

[06:41] But in front of 50,000 roaring, screaming fans, we were here ready to put on quite the show and really put my delusion to the test. Overall, I was feeling extremely confident going into net. Show me big dog in the net. There

[06:56] net. Show me big dog in the net. There we go. There we go. the whole thing? >> I think so. It's not far away. That's >> No. Jeeoff, do you have something like on a PK like a routine where you jump up

[07:09] and hit the crossbar or anything? >> A little bit of this. Make yourself look >> He looks big. He looks big. >> Stay on the line before they kick it >> So your feet have to go on the line. But a little bit, you know, a little

[07:21] towards you. Yep. >> Hands behind it. You always want to try >> That's like the key. W catch right there. Got it. >> Uh, let's do a throw first. >> Throw first. All right.

[07:34] >> So, I get your weight off your heels. >> There you go. Yeah. You want to be a little bit more mobile. There you go. All right. A little side to side. what I'm saying. >> Easy game. Easy game. Oh, yeah. All

[07:48] >> There you go. >> One of those guys. probably come out of the goal. Yeah. Because that those were all goals. Yeah. >> he you fooled me. >> But that's a but that's a minor detail.

[08:02] In front of the line is usually ideal. >> Y

[08:18] >> And a boy. Here we go. >> A boy. >> Sounds good. >> All right. If you're going to dive, you

[08:31] >> That's like 101. Cuz if you dive backwards, it's in the goal. And if you >> Like being a goalie is all about angles. So, it's all about like trying to cut down the angles because you're trying to limit how much the goal is behind you.

[08:44] about how to dive or do you just kind of like throw yourself at it? Like, is there a safe way to do it? safeish. So, you want to land like if you're going to >> And here like you always want to land on your side. So, you don't want to do like

[08:57] >> And then if you're landing on your back, that means you're diving backwards. So, >> So, the idea is limiting limiting the pain that you experience. So, great. right, like if you're going to dive into this ball, you're here and it's step

[09:13] >> and forward. So, like you see how like here, here, and here. Like that's the >> Okay? Even just going like this is somehow scary to me. That's crazy. >> Ready? >> Yes. Hold on. Hold on. Hold. We'll do it

[09:27] >> Okay. >> There you go. >> I don't like >> Here. Let's You want to ease into it? bottom. >> Okay.

[09:39] >> Nine-year-olds can't do this, can they? >> Yep. Get up to your They do. Okay. All >> Okay. >> Same thing. Just dive the ball. stomach. Yep. >> The stomach. That hurts.

[09:51] >> Pain management. There you go. Use the ground. Use the ground as like the third on top. >> Okay. >> That was good. >> All right. Now, I'm getting confident.

[10:04] >> Oh, yeah. >> Still safe. Still safe. All right. So, >> You want to go? >> Give him a taste of what he's in for. strategy >> to get to either side to be Okay. All

[10:17] >> Hand on the ground. >> Yeah. Honestly, three. >> I mean, I was there, too. I just knew.

[10:29] >> From the internet that hitting the crossar is cool if you mean to do it. crossar is cool if you mean to do it. >> Yeah.

[10:46] >> Yep. I called it too a second ago. >> Yeah. >> Oh. All right. I think unfortunately you can't really do the step against Charlie cuz he doesn't go down. Like he's kind of immune to that strategy.

[10:59] >> Not do anything. >> Yeah. it took. >> That was good. I was there, too. I just >> That's the one where you dive. >> Yeah, I needed to dive in the ground.

[11:20] >> I like it though. You're trying some tricky stuff with your eyes. them off a little bit. >> That's good.

[11:34] bested than you guys. >> Yeah. >> We all knew that would happen, though. beat scrubs. >> Do you have a Do you have a strategy

[11:46] >> I'm going to be real. I think with my luck, I'm going to end up just right in luck, I'm going to end up just right in the face unintentionally. >> We got We got some. We got some. >> PKs are significantly easier when they

[12:01] >> PKs are significantly easier when they don't hit the goal. I will say that. >> Oh, what a strike. There it is. >> Flames coming up.

[12:14] >> Flames coming up. Oh, what a shot. >> Oh, yeah. Chelsea needs to shoot. >> You want to come take some?

[12:30] >> That was just soccer. >> Well, I think I'm not I'm not afraid now. I think that's a big thing. I'm getting warmed up.

[12:42] >> Okay. That's why I start talking [ __ ] >> Oh, man. This is easy. Easy game.

[12:54] then left. >> Yeah. And then went right back to doing her top >> like it was a normal day.

[13:06] >> Yep. That one went fast. That one went fast. I did say PKs. I probably can't >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Except for me.

[13:26] >> You're in the Hall of Fame. I can't believe it. >> That's where you take the ball. I guess your hands and just kick it. He does a He thinks PKs are hard. He thinks it's easy when like people are

[13:40] >> Would you legitimately would you say that's easier than stopping a PK? >> PKs are like that's like the hardness thing. >> Cuz that's just 12 yards out oneonone. Whole goal behind you.

[13:53] here and take like actual shots, we can do that, too. talking about right there. That's the kind of [ __ ] I save all day. all day. kind of [ __ ] I save all day. all day. Good

[14:10] >> I know. I could have had that. >> Okay, I've got a new strategy. >> Okay, I've got a new strategy. >> Yep.

[14:22] >> What's the new strategy? >> I was trying to get there with my foot. >> I was trying to get there with my foot. >> Oh my god. Are you guys getting excited for you to try it?

[14:42] >> Oh, you were there for that one. >> I was there, too. >> There you go. >> Oh, that's a save. >> I am right there. If only there was a way to extend your reach just like a

[14:57] little bit further >> without hurting myself. I agree. >> He might have. He did his >> outside of your body.

[15:09] post? >> Well, it's cheating. >> Just little dive. >> Little dive. >> Nice. Nice. >> I went on my stomach, but we got there.

[15:23] >> Nope. But it feels good to save it. >> Yeah. the ground. >> My mind has one track. It's either am I

[15:35] diving? Yes. Okay. Nothing else matters. >> And I was ready. need to go too far. All right. Just have a ball get in the line. just going to spear that out. That's

[15:50] >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So, you got to tell me which foot you want to shoot with. going to be I might need you to You might be in the danger zone.

[16:02] >> So, all it is just pass me the ball. I'm pass me the ball. You come up. I'm just >> All right. >> Yep. So, play it in. Follow your pass. >> Shot. >> Boom. Easy.

[16:17] >> Boom. Easy. >> Right foot. All right. That was good. >> Left foot. All right.

[16:30] >> Left foot. All right. Never see it coming.

[16:42] >> All right. I'm going to put them in a little closer. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A little closer. >> Wait, you just took it from right there. >> So, with goalie, the closer that they get, you got to close down the angle a

[16:54] >> So, it's almost like counterintuitive, right? Get closer to where the ball's >> Yeah. Yeah. >> All right. Good. Right foot. >> All right. Good. Right foot. >> All right. Here we go.

[17:09] >> Bring the shot down. A little closer to the goal, too. >> No, no need. >> Let's go. Right. >> Can you slide? Can you do a slide? >> No.

[17:21] >> Thought about it though. >> Thought about it for a brief second. you. >> That's what I'm talking about.

[17:37] on defense since you're tall. >> Yeah. >> So, you can be the one. Come in like Yeah. Like kind of crowd the box. Make Yeah. Like kind of crowd the box. Make him make him fight you for it.

[17:55] don't use your hands. That's it. >> My instinct there was like, "Oh, I can >> It went off my finger and I was like, "Oh, that play's dead."

[18:09] >> Oh, that's too high. Oh, >> Yeah. No, he's placed those really well, actually.

[18:22] >> Only way. The redacted line is Jeff Messi. >> It's easy. >> Matt, you're making me look bad.

[18:40] >> All right, let's uh let's get let's let Matt try to score. >> You want to try and score now? >> Yeah, I'll move. tall enough. You got to you got to get over him.

[18:53] >> right? You actually want to try to hit Charlie with your head like while you're Charlie with your head like while you're going at him. >> Oh, >> get out on him.

[19:10] >> I decided to try to bring my foot to my head height. I don't know why. Chase. >> Oh, low one. Low one. Oh, nice. >> Good play, Charles. Good play. >> Yeah. See, I'm never off guard. I stay

[19:23] online. >> I tried to hype myself up.

[19:40] >> I can't get that. >> Oh, that's you, baby. >> What were you thinking? >> You know, he's not wrong. He's doing a lot better.

[19:52] lot better. >> Oh, that's too deep for me. >> It's so much fun to do that. >> Does it not hurt? I mean, a little bit, >> Seems like that's a common theme in soccer.

[20:06] soccer. >> Yep. Wasn't even trying to catch it. to jump. >> You got to come out there on me. >> You got to come out there on me. >> He's getting up there.

[20:24] >> Is that what that is? >> Yeah. >> Yes. How you feeling? >> A little tired, but I'm having too much fun to stop. >> Don't say that. You're spoiling the

[20:36] surprise. >> No, you're spoiling the surprise. >> That was good. Have that. >> Oh, I think we're too afraid to hit each

[20:51] >> which I think is fair. >> Yeah, we got to just fight. Chase coming out was like, "Nope, >> no holds bar." All right, here we go. >> Street rules. That's a

[21:04] kicked in. >> You know why I had it? >> I know. I know. >> Yeah. >> And you were saying you've only played

[21:16] >> Yeah. >> It is scary though when I'm sure it is more for you when you're going in for like a header and they're coming out. smash into each other." That's why like like honestly that's why I never want to

[21:28] >> Like everyone's always like being a goalie is crazy. And I'm like I watch 80 80 ft in the air and it's coming down like a bullet and they're just like crazy. >> I'd rather have I'd rather have the

[21:41] or my head. >> Not like this. >> was saying I was like I was like soccer. I had asthma >> I should have been. >> Did you grow out of asthma? I just grew

[21:54] >> Dude, it's just like defeated as >> Start breathing asthma. I had no >> You're like a >> I'm starting to think it wasn't asthma. It was just over. >> No, that's Dude, you did it. You found

[22:07] the key. All right. So, I think Do you guys know the old school MLS shootout? >> I know it's like 6 to8 seconds. >> Yeah. So, yeah, that's just cuz you heard me talking. All right. So, the MLS, they used to never end in ties.

[22:19] called like they would do a shootout, but it was kind of similar to hockey. circle and then you had 8 seconds to score and it was just 1 v one. coming in, goalie's coming out, you have 8 seconds to score. I think they did

[22:32] the game. >> Who's going first? Aaron. >> Yep. >> All right, here we go. >> All right, here we go. >> One, two, three, four, five, six.

[22:53] That's a good touch. >> Stop backing up. Stop backing up. >> Now you get to talk [ __ ] >> What was that?

[23:06] >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. That was That was me being afraid. >> Confidence. >> He's big. He's It was scary.

[23:20] >> I think he's supposed to start on the line, but that's a minor detail. line, but that's a minor detail. >> There it is. >> You got his weakness >> on the ground.

[23:36] >> I got to stay big. You're right. >> Go look small. >> Don't laugh. His arms out. >> There you go. A Damn it.

[23:59] >> Not that time. >> Good challenge. >> You got to score. >> How many?

[24:15] >> You're good, >> dude. Go in here. Keeper. >> I thought you were gone. >> Keeper. >> Yeah. All right, Aaron. You got this on. >> All right, Aaron, you get out on him.

[24:27] >> Scare him. >> Spit on him. >> Oh, we got strats. We got strats. >> Don't let him scare you with the on him. >> That a boy.

[24:39] the way. >> Thank you. I feel it. >> Looking good. >> YES. OH, NO. OH MY GOSH. OH, >> He put it behind his back. He went in. >> You really thought in this temple?

[24:55] in. >> That was a great play and a a great >> Bar review. Show me the the line. >> Nope. I got it out in time.

[25:14] offensively. Offensively, it could use a little work, but I like the play that they drew up. Just got to get that finishing touch in, >> Not with me. >> Going straight down the middle. You got

[25:26] >> All the room. >> Ready. That's you, Aaron. >> I faked myself out. >> I faked myself out. >> That was the right idea, though.

[25:41] >> Oh. Oh. Oh. >> Oh, let it go. It's in. >> Totally intentional. >> That sounds good. >> Totally intentional. >> I thought that just missed entirely.

[25:53] >> Yeah, I'm going to do that. >> Run at one of them. You get out on ball. >> Run at one of them. >> It's still alive. >> Oh, header.

[26:10] >> Didn't realize we were playing prison rules. Next time I'm just booting it rules. Next time I'm just booting it away. Get out on him, Chase.

[26:24] Chase, you can't do that. >> Your hand.

[26:36] >> All right, so now that we've learned so much today, final test. Here we go. much today, final test. Here we go. Final test. >> I am big. >> No fear. No fear. You can't see it

[26:51] >> Oh, wow. >> You're all right. >> Okay. All right. >> Oh, wow. Charlie. >> I got wrong footed.

[27:05] >> Die. >> All right. This one for sure. Okay. Here >> All right. This one for sure. Okay. Here we go. that one? >> It wouldn't hurt.

[27:26] >> just my hands. >> Show them. Show them some like something >> Show them. Show them some like something real. I'll freak him out. real. I'll freak him out. >> Oh.

[27:44] >> Oh, wow. >> I was there. Just I missed it. >> Good save. >> You see that?

[27:59] >> How are you feeling about goalending now? Uh, well, when I play against my >> Pros maybe a little higher than I thought. Fundamentals? >> Solid. Everything rocks solid. If we can

[28:13] might be interested in furthering the conversation. >> Yeah, little trial. Yeah, just a little trial. Just a little trial run. Get you >> No, you you're with the rowdies now. Like you work with them, so that is a

[28:25] verbal contract that you get a 10day if you start diving. I don't necessarily good word. >> I like that. And then we put pillows on >> right? Crash pads. I'm diving all day. >> I'm Here's the thing. I'm like, I didn't

[28:39] for US Soccer. So, now that I have you on the radar, players to keep an eye on in the event that something happens. >> Yeah. >> Whoa.

[28:51] I think we're good there. >> You heard it. See, goalie, easy. Took me one day to master it. Thank you so much for that. Of course, good job. That was fun. >> If you want to see Jeff in, watch the

[29:07] >> And then you're going to see how I'm also a top tier striker. Two star striker. He doesn't stand a chance. This guy No chance. Two and a half to three. it. He told me on the cover of that magazine.

[29:22] >> Yeah. Thank you so much, brother. >> All right. How's phone man?