A Deadly Beating! | The Investigator

[00:02] Right now, I'm going to play a really fun game with you, but unfortunately, when you find out the result, you'll regret playing with me. Raise your hand like I'm raising it now, and lower one finger if what I'm about to say now, and lower one finger if what I'm about to say happened to you. Lower one finger if you were hit a lot when

[00:14] disrespect, problems, or insults. Lower one finger if your parents fight a lot and you've done that to me before, so I'll hit my son while I'm upset with myself, crying and feeling guilty while I'm hurting him. Lower one finger understands you. The first time I hit was when my father, may God have mercy on him, disciplined me by hitting me for smoking cigarettes.

[00:31] Lower one finger if you get nervous when you hear a family member's voice upset, but that doesn't mean parents don't have some issues and complexes inside.

[00:45] They've drawn a line in their heads for you; they want you to follow a certain path. Lower two fingers Or more, and I regret to inform you that you have gone through one of the most difficult experiences you have ever faced in your life, and the effects of this experience are still present in you to this day, namely

[01:01] present in you to this day, namely friends. Welcome to my humble room and to a new episode of the humble room and to a new episode of the Investigator program on January 10, 2025. A group of

[01:13] Egyptian police officers are sitting in the... well, while they are sitting, the phone rings, so one of the officers gets up to answer it and finds out that a murder has occurred in a place called Matareya. If you don't know where Matareya is, it is an area located within Cairo in Egypt. Anyway, the

[01:26] officers rush to the location of the report to see what happened there and what caused the report. As soon as they arrive, they find one of the most heinous crimes they will ever see. What happened was that a girl who lived in Matareya, 18

[01:39] years old, and her father were talking to each other. So, as you say, while they were talking, a disagreement arose between them. One word here, another there, and the father became angry with the girl and started hitting her. He kept hitting his daughter hysterically with his hands, feet,

[01:54] and stick, to the point that the girl fainted from the amount of beating. He hit her brutally. So, in order to wake his daughter up from the state of unconsciousness she was in, what do you think the father did? Her father brought her water with sugar to revive her from her unconscious state. He would heat a knife over a fire until it was

[02:09] extremely hot and then stab her with it in sensitive parts of her body. She would only regain consciousness from the intense pain. The problem is that this man continued doing this to his daughter without mercy. He did this to her for about five continuous hours, beating her

[02:24] very violently. If she fainted, he would immediately stab her with the knife. He continued for five hours without stopping until his daughter died. This crime has been classified as one of the most heinous cases of domestic violence in Egypt in recent years. But you

[02:38] know, what drove me crazy was why someone could do this to their own daughter. I realized that to understand why this man did this to his daughter, I first needed to understand what domestic violence is and whether it means being beaten by your father, mother, or someone else. Your husband, if you're a married woman, or are there

[02:52] other types we don't know about? That's why today we went out to ask people what domestic violence means. Domestic violence, for example, is when your family treats you badly, like being angry or something like that. Any kind of violence can happen within the family, like a father hitting his children, or a mother hitting her children very violently.

[03:08] Parents in general instill negative ideas in their children, or there might be physical abuse, insults, or things like that. their children, or there might be physical abuse, insults, or things like that. hitting them in a bad way, which can lead to the child developing psychological issues. Do

[03:23] you know what domestic violence is? Have you studied this in school before? What is n't know. That's why we came today to ask Dr. Ibrahim Khattab, because if you want to ask about something, ask those who know. How are you, Doctor? How are things? How's everything?

[03:37] something, ask those who know. How are you, Doctor? How are things? How's everything? audience. My name is Ibrahim Ibrahim Khattab. I'm a psychologist and behavioral therapist working in the field of training. Thank God, I have over 15 years of experience in training

[03:51] What is domestic violence? The idea behind domestic violence is that pressure is exerted on the child by the father and mother. This pressure or harm has many forms, but before we discuss that, it's important to note that

[04:05] before we discuss that, it's important to note that domestic violence is often linked to sound concepts and ideas held by the father and mother. Their intentions are positive; they want to help you, they want you to be good, they want you to become a want to help you, they want you to be good, they want you to become a man. These are their perspectives, and

[04:18] their intentions are very positive. The behavior itself is impactful. Domestic violence, simply put, is a type of abuse and harm that you can experience from any member of your family, whether it's your father, mother, or husband if you are a married woman. It doesn't necessarily have to be close relatives; it

[04:32] could be an uncle, cousin, or sibling. The point is that, unfortunately, it can be someone within your own family. So, what are the types of domestic violence? Is there only one type, or are there several? Of course, there are several types. For example, tell me what

[04:45] types of abuse you know. First of all, of course, they might constantly discourage him, not take him seriously, for example. There might be harshness in their speech, they might not give him any appreciation, and so on. And then there's psychological abuse, for example, something that

[05:00] affects the child's overall psyche, or the issue of hitting in general, or things like that. exactly? Look, what I see is, generally speaking, someone might be harsh with their children, for example, hitting them,

[05:15] something like in those movies. Yes, but it can cause someone to have trauma. After that, when you know about these things, do you see different types of domestic abuse, or is it? like, for example, a bad approach,

[05:27] crushing ambitions, everything. For example, they might find fault with you, like, what's your flaw? They always see you as a failure or not successful. They want to draw a line for you. Their brains types of domestic violence besides physical violence or hitting?

[05:41] Look at the worst, or the most common type, as you said, which is physical abuse, hitting. Parents aren't usually very aware of it, or we need to be aware of it. The impact of verbal abuse is sometimes greater or more severe than physical abuse. For example, saying things like, "You're a

[05:57] failure, you're stupid," is verbal abuse. The idea behind it is that the mother says, "Get up and study, you failure," to motivate him. Yes, to motivate and provoke him to get up and study, as if that's part of the motivation.

[06:12] expect. Because, as a friend, many people hear the word "violence" and associate it with hitting or physical abuse. But in reality, yes, hitting and physical abuse are types of domestic violence, but not all of it. Domestic violence has many forms. But

[06:26] if We'll categorize them into two categories: physical violence and psychological violence. Which is more dangerous? Both are equally dangerous, and they're often interconnected. For example, the danger to human life, as it can lead to death, is physical violence. Its

[06:41] basic concept is that someone physically assaults you, like the story of the girl from Matareya I just told. The problem with physical violence is that it's always accompanied by psychological violence. As they say, you're hit and shaken, or you're subjected to psychological abuse. That's why I believe

[06:55] physical violence is more dangerous because it's a mix of physical and psychological violence. In reality, I'm not downplaying it at all, because it does n't rely on someone physically hitting you to abuse you. It relies on breaking the other person with your words and actions without touching them, like insulting them, threatening them, and making

[07:10] them feel worthless and useless. The hardest thing for a person is to feel worthless. It has no value or benefit, so why is he even alive? Psychological violence isn't necessarily words; it can be actions like punitive silence, ignoring him, not caring about him. All friends are truly

[07:25] very painful, especially if it comes from the closest person to you, your parents. Imagine that the people closest to you are treating you like this. You know, when I looked at statistics on domestic violence think the rate of domestic violence in the world is

[07:40] n't want to give you an exact percentage, but we can talk about it a bit too much. No, millions, of course. And some things happen outside of Egypt, thank God we don't have them here. There's child slavery in Africa and things in I don't know where in Asia. There are

[07:54] things, things that are much, much more than what we have here. Do you whole world, practically the whole world, is subjected to it. The whole world,

[08:06] based on statistics released by UNICEF in 2024. These statistics were about domestic violence against children worldwide. UNICEF stated that every four minutes, a child dies due to domestic violence

[08:19] inflicted by their parents. Of these, 30,000 are adolescents. Every year, two out of every three children are subjected to regular physical violence from their parents for any perceived wrongdoing. More than two- thirds of them also experience psychological abuse in addition to physical violence. Just

[08:33] imagine these numbers – they are terrifying. All of this is happening to children at the hands of their parents, which fueled my curiosity and made me want to know why parents would do this to their own children, who are the closest people to them. One important point to this to their own children, who are the closest people to them. One important point to

[08:49] direct. It's not always the parents who commit it. They torture or beat them, or they abuse them psychologically, which is why we call it domestic violence. Also, be aware that it can be indirect. For example, if the father and mother are always fighting, and the father might be abusive and hit the mother, and the

[09:03] child witnesses this and lives in this turbulent environment, even if no one intervenes, this is a type of domestic violence against the child. Why would a father or mother do this to their children? Why would you even think that a father or mother would do this to their children? They might think this is the

[09:16] right way, that they are protecting their children, teaching them new things, or teaching them what is right. But this is certainly not a good way. For example, why would a father or mother hit their children or expose them to violence? I want to understand this point. It

[09:30] really comes down to the father's or mother's upbringing. It does n't necessarily mean the child is bad; it could be due to the you mean that someone might be different. Opinions about child-rearing, for example, that the mother is good and raises her child well, while the father is not. I mean,

[09:45] most people were surprised that a father and mother would do that to the most important person in their lives, their child. That's a good question, and we answered part of it at the beginning. Violence, whether verbal or physical, often stems from how they were raised

[09:59] Okay, I mean, I want to motivate you, not hurt you. That's understand. So, Mom does this not to harm you, that's Mom does this with the intention of helping you,

[10:12] But that doesn't mean parents don't have some issues or complexes inside them. That's for sure. But what I mean is, I wouldn't intentionally sit with you and hurt But what I mean is, I wouldn't intentionally sit with you and hurt or break you. Let's say that in 98%

[10:27] of families, the main, primary, and only purpose isn't to hurt you, it's to motivate you, but in the wrong way. All the research studies that have been done... On this topic, you're saying that there isn't a single reason we can definitively say is the cause of domestic violence perpetrated by parents against their children. In short, the issue is

[10:43] related to more than one reason. For example, the most common reason a father might hit his son or treat him badly could be that the father or mother were often raised in the same way, within a history of domestic violence in the family. The father or mother might have been

[10:56] beaten or punished as children, so they might feel it's right to raise their children the same way because they were likely raised that way. And keep in mind, this is just one reason, not the only one. It could also be stress or psychological problems in the parents. For example, they might always be

[11:09] stressed or irritable, unable to stand to hear a word from anyone, and always seem depressed. All of this can manifest as fights between them or as physical or psychological violence against their children as a way to release these pent-up feelings. Now,

[11:24] n't forgotten it. Maybe it was because of the certificate; the result wasn't the best, and so on. So, for him, he was like, "He was my uncle because my father is deceased." So, for get this result." You understand what I mean? So, the matter was conveyed through physical punishment. So,

[11:40] matter was conveyed through physical punishment. So, beating from a woman? You know, you were very young, so you don't remember anything specific. Well, was it because you did something wrong? At a young age, for example, seven or

[11:53] eight years old? Or, after that, you grew up, and your family started talking to you, and so on. You understand? There's no one who hasn't been beaten. So, what's the most severe beating you've ever received that you haven't forgotten? Maybe the first time you were beaten was when you smoked cigarettes from... My father, may God have mercy on him, was a bad person, of course,

[12:08] course, we were young. So, the hitting, I mean, it reached a certain level, no, but it wasn't like that, it was light things, also for the sake of teaching us, but the wrong thing is no, of course not. Have you ever hit before?

[12:22] got a beating. Tell me, what's the worst beating you remember? I don't remember, or I had Okay, then tell me, what's the worst situation you remember? Don't look at it, it won't do you any harm. Tell me, what's the worst hit my brother, and be aware that it can also be societal pressure on

[12:38] fathers, like poverty or unemployment, because if there is material poverty, or for example, if the father doesn't work, any house will always be like that, you'll always find that house is not right, because poverty and unemployment make everyone's mental state bad. Even if a young man just graduated and then didn't work, his mental state will be bad. Imagine a father or

[12:51] mother with responsibilities and children; all these factors increase tension within the family, which then translates children or indirectly. I'm not saying these reasons justify it, but we're seeing where the problem starts. Ultimately, it could unfortunately stem from a type of

[13:06] flawed parenting the father or mother experienced. They might have been raised believing that hitting will make their child respectful—a distorted concept. The father or mother has a distorted idea of ​​parenting, thinking, "This is how I was raised," meaning they were beaten and it worked for them, so they believe

[13:20] child will make them turn out well. The mother and father might even go to a teacher and ask him to break something, believing that hitting will teach the child. Or they might believe that if they treat their daughter badly or don't nurture her, she won't rebel, while the

[13:34] opposite is true if they spoil and nurture her. The idea that a girl will be spoiled is a belief deeply ingrained in the minds of many parents because, unfortunately, they were raised incorrectly. Consequently, they have no one but their own family to project these beliefs onto. But how can a child be affected by something like domestic violence, whether

[13:48] direct or indirect? All the scientific research published in the NIH (National Institutes of Health) has found that domestic violence against children always has negative consequences, whether they are exposed to it directly or indirectly. For example, a child

[14:02] who sees their mother being beaten and humiliated by their father all day long, with constant shouting and things being broken, even if no one touches the child, is greatly affected. On a psychological level, the child's development is severely impacted. The child will always feel fear, threat, and depression because the

[14:17] person they love most and consider their source of security is the one who hurts them the most. And that's not all! If a child is exposed to this kind of physical violence, you'll find that the child becomes afraid of making mistakes or failing because they fear their parents won't love them, and might even hit them. It's as if the parents are

[14:31] linking their child's worth to what they do: "If you get this grade or do this thing we want, then we'll love you." But the opposite is true when a child is exposed to domestic violence. The child feels all of this internally, but on an

[14:45] external psychological level, you'll find that the child is also affected. For example, they might become very aggressive towards their peers, or they might become timid and afraid of them. This is due to the child's nature. You might find the child constantly feeling sad and depressed; the smallest thing can make them cry. And keep in mind, all of this is on the

[14:59] psychological level, but domestic violence also affects the child's mental development. You might find that the child isn't doing well academically; their mind can't grasp things they should be learning. Children his age understand it very normally. For example, according to a study conducted on a group of children from

[15:12] Britain whose mothers were subjected to domestic violence by their husbands while pregnant with them, the son was more likely to have a decrease in IQ or intelligence levels by 50%. Can you imagine how far the impact of domestic violence on children has gone? And of course, as a result of all these influences and experiences the

[15:27] child goes through, they develop a kind of block from their parents. They don't accept them, even if they can't articulate it. They see the mom and dad who hit them, or even the dad who hits the mom, as evil, the opposite of all the parents of their friends. So, a psychological barrier forms for the child towards the

[15:42] person who perpetrates domestic violence. But does the impact of the domestic violence the child experienced in childhood stop with them until childhood, or does it continue into adulthood? Does this issue persist into adulthood? The impact of this issue continues into adulthood, of course, especially if

[15:56] we are in a dysfunctional family. This child grows up to be something we call a "pleasant personality," which most parents unfortunately don't realize. The domestic violence the child experienced in childhood, without understanding anything, whether it was direct or indirect, will continue to affect them psychologically into

[16:09] adulthood. For example, in a study conducted on 457 A young man in his teens who experienced domestic violence as a child. Psychiatrists have noticed that the effects of that violence are still present in him, even though many years have passed.

[16:23] You'll find that most of these young people become depressed easily and experience intense sadness over the smallest things, or even for no reason at all. They constantly feel fear and anxiety, even when there's nothing to frighten them. Furthermore, they develop a kind of rebellion towards others and become very easily angered. Unfortunately, they themselves may

[16:38] become violent over time. When they grow up and have children, they too will involuntarily expose their children to domestic violence, and the cycle continues like an epidemic, passed down through generations. This is the bitter truth, unfortunately. They, too, when they grew up, exposed their children to domestic violence. That's why you should

[16:53] n't be surprised to find laws criminalizing domestic violence in the internet and among friends. What I want to tell you is... I understand you if you experienced any kind of domestic violence as a child, or unfortunately, if you're still experiencing it. I know it's incredibly difficult, and its

[17:06] psychological effects, even as you grow older, can still be impactful. You're the one with the problem, so you're the one who needs to help yourself, not shift the blame onto others. Because if you do that, you'll help yourself, not shift the blame onto others. Because if you do that, you'll become a complainer, playing the

[17:19] victim in every aspect of your life. If you don't address it, your problem will persist. What I want to tell you is that if, unfortunately, someone in your family is perpetrating domestic violence against you, it might not be intentional. Simply put, the father or mother might have been raised in the

[17:33] wrong way, or they might believe that hitting or psychological abuse is effective. I'm not saying this is an excuse, but you need to understand this. Don't wait for someone else to guide you. Try to get yourself back on your own. I accept that you've been hurt, I respect your feelings, and I understand that you're in pain, but...

[17:49] take a step. No, your life won't stop here. You're wasting your life and missing out on so many good things around you while you're standing here. I have to get up now and see what I'm supposed to do. And don't forget to look at the resources

[18:01] in the description below, and as usual, don't forget to share.