Insidious: The Red Door — Full Breakdown & Transcript

[00:12] curious how I can get out of 47 seconds of logos. terrifying. This child never gets sick nor her homework ruined despite standing

[00:25] out in the rain as if the expression soaked to the bone is aspirational. The ASMR obsessed foley artist who went to town on the squeaky effects for this backpack, this flashlight, this bed frame,

[00:39] this bed frame, and this undead geriatric jawline. to take a pair of unsuspecting hobbits to Isengard? Also, forcing me to read in figure out a realistic way for your characters to say each other's names out

[00:53] loud. 1999 is a pivotal year in Gemma's childhood, but the movie completely ignores the Y2K scare, the Melissa virus, and the NSA ban on Furbies. That year handed you three ready-made horror plots and you went with another goddamn

[01:06] It's because this house is being haunted by the self-drying jacket from Back to by the self-drying jacket from Back to the Future. couldn't show you the time and instead had to call another phone and ask. Yet

[01:21] another 21st century horror movie built around parental drama. I sometimes miss chased by a leprechaun because they stole his gold. Sigh. Gemma stops the microwave early so it doesn't wake her mom, but then leaves without clearing

[01:34] the remaining 1 second from the display. I think we know who the real monster is straight-A student. I suppose we'll just have to figure out that mystery on our achievement is specifically for Gemma's work in music, a topic we will never

[01:48] hear her mention or show any interest in for THIS ENTIRE FILM. END UP being a red herring. The real demon is a dead cult leader trying to exploit the mom's dimensional freak capacity because even childhood trauma

[02:02] manager. We'll learn in the end that Ingrid here can talk to her daughter in the real world while also talking to evil demon Cyrus in the further. It will accept that she's some kind of Schrödinger's quantumly entangled

[02:16] >> Watch me. >> Ingrid does an incredible job of eventually revealed to be an epic act of self-sacrifice. She doesn't seem to realize that her plan works just as well if she throws Gemma a final I love you

[02:28] instead of her you demon sign-off. Bathroom doors in horror movies remaining the least effective barriers against either bodily fluids or lifelong psychological damage. The Insidious logo hits the screen with that ear-splitting

[02:40] committed to jump scares that even its own name can't enter a room normally. The sixth Insidious film may have abandoned the original Lambert family, trauma followed by a time jump cliche back from the further every damn time.

[02:54] The movie repeatedly confuses gross with scary. I am not scared. I just don't >> You see? Not as scary as they look. clearly a dog toy for your daughter when you have no intention of buying her a

[03:07] Also, Gemma has a mysteriously fatherless daughter of her own just like being very convenient for the demons of the demons of me buying into the organic plot points of this movie.

[03:21] aren't cool? >> No, my toys are great, but we need to creepy playback function that somehow eavesdrops on the further. Duh. Gemma has decided to keep the house

[03:34] her childhood and then also decided to raise her own daughter there. I get that this one came with one hell of an emotional mortgage. about? >> talking to you at all, Bill.

[03:47] >> This couple bickers on for quite some time, so we'll feel some kind of way sanitary towels because it's physically impossible to feel empathy for a murdered couple unless we know something adorable about them. Since we find out

[03:59] ghouls we're looking for, this sudden creepy pause doesn't make a lot of sense. All it achieves is prematurely giving away that they're a trio Gemma the hell are they carrying around the gas tanks they eventually use to get to

[04:12] Gemma? If she never sees them here, there's a good chance the entire evil plan is never exposed. Why is this room so dark? Okay, your childhood home was a don't have to light it like one. Also, I didn't realize that doing your homework

[04:24] possible was a maternal gene you could pass on. that is a particularly brutal observation.

[04:36] >> Old people die, get over it. >> Is this my grandma? into the garage to look in these boxes before, yet goes straight to the one waiting right under the lid for this question. This would be a clever piece

[04:49] intended it or was at all interested in character development. >> Oh mighty Cyrus, how are you going to distinguish yourself from the rogue's franchise? >> I'm not sure, but I'm thinking of

[05:01] scratching up some random pieces of jewelry that might not have been found. live in the house where your mother smashed her own head in, I feel like where your mother smashed her own head in.

[05:18] to the further. But how the [ __ ] are they sleeping standing up? Also, why do this right outside Gemma's house? Sure, it's a shorter commute, but hide behind a tree or something at least. This incredible, precise kick that managed to

[05:31] switch that flashlight on while knocking it under the bed in just the right way to reveal ghosty legs to dramatic effect. Also, you have to respect the themselves that we never know about because a random torch or closing

[05:44] >> Corbin, sweetheart, you got broken fingers, you can't punch my number. 17 messages. And don't tell me your machine is broken again. Those things >> If Cyrus stopped warning Gemma that he was coming for her, she would have had

[05:57] less time to investigate what is going on and prepare her counteroffensive. opening? Maybe the reason they're stuck communication skills. >> You having a nightmare?

[06:10] >> A dream that was actually an astral projection that happened at 1:55 a.m. sleeping body, meaning Maya heard the screams and then waited 6 hours to do >> No. >> And Gemma will accept this answer and

[06:25] just kind of move on from this discovery as if it's not the weirdest god damn just mysteriously pops up in her bed and she ends up acting like, well, I guess guess I should vacuum under the bed more.

[06:39] >> Mhm. You want to know why? >> Think I do, when the time is right. >> And that time will be when I need you to babysit her completely unattended while >> Yeah. >> In these movies, it's never clear if the

[06:52] the further is just filled with a bunch of bored practical jokers. >> Yes, with toothpaste. >> Yes, Mom. needs clarification. What kind of psychopath brushes their teeth dry?

[07:06] Myers is just standing in the background of the shot? That trick still works as if it's the 109th insidious demon to do it and nothing comes of it, right? Also, maybe Gemma could give her peripheral vision a fighting chance by not keeping

[07:18] the house dark enough to house a thousand Gizmos. acolytes with Gemma here, but god damn, they have impressive foresight. They

[07:30] later, see the picture frame was down, notice it's backing all the way over by was plan B if she just picked up the frame and went to bed? Reschedule the frame and went to bed? Reschedule the demon invasion?

[07:45] grabbing your daughter and burning the house down and then moving to Puerto Rico. This very obvious yet discount backroom-ing shows that Blumhouse has phase of its life where it doesn't quite understand what the young people are

[07:59] appeal to them anyway. >> Maya? expansive pillow fort is not only totally normal but that Maya is accidentally been raising the next Doctor Who without realizing it.

[08:12] >> Welcome to unhelpful pronoun gaming with discount Reverend Henry Kane. I'd love haunting brainstorming session in the further resulted in a pillow fort chase with birth metaphor climax and I'd also love to know which ideas were rejected

[08:26] acolytes are testing whether Gemma can bring objects back from the further, Lester could just hand her the pin while she's asleep in the chair. She'd get the rug burn obstacle course for the sake of a jewelry handoff.

[08:39] bandits had their thing and this is going to be mine. >> Then why does Nick think she didn't see them? Why would she say she didn't see scripts? >> I'm just dealing with my own nightmares

[08:53] >> Movie introduces Nick's fear of cockroaches that will be expertly paid sound right. Movie introduces dumb cockroach fear that it will try to pay impacts nothing. Much better. >> Jim, if you keep yourself in that house,

[09:08] pictured them sometimes. >> Nick suggests old memories might be woke up holding jewelry like her mother wore. Seeping in from where, Nick? Since >> Lester? >> The man from the nightmare checks in for

[09:23] at which I would put the hygienist tools down and refer him to literally anyone policy. >> I think I've seen you walking in my >> Not at least attempting to ask for a second person in the room as you examine

[09:36] the man who it's now confirmed has been stalking you. Following up this follow up with no follow up at all. convince Gemma to stop the appointment, the bonus set should. The insurance

[09:50] code for mouth contains sequel. These x-rays show the second set of teeth progressing in front of the other teeth, not as a second inner layer as we see them later. Also, you usually leave the room during the x-ray to avoid repeated

[10:03] many shots as possible while standing beside the machine just in case there's real time. >> I'm just going to take a look inside, >> Gemma has seen the inside of that mouth, yet she still puts her fingers in it.

[10:16] When he bites her, that's no longer a jump scare, that's just karma. Since a the franchise's supernatural rules now share uncomfortable overlap with the meander through the Further is for anyone who said, "Give me Beetlejuice,

[10:30] >> Where's my toy? >> Ghost kid asks Gemma where her toy is expecting the nearest adult to remember where they left their Gemma has the these fingers entering her mouth, but doesn't. And I'm really starting to

[10:43] to succeed as a Further career. The local spirits waste absolutely no time Further. They must have a better neighborhood watch than her actual stand around staring at her and nobody says a god damn thing.

[10:57] >> Eeny, meeny, miny, [snorts] convention of eeny, meeny, miny, moe things. Since you didn't put them in a line, you're basically just picking the one you want. The eenys and meenys mean

[11:10] encounters looks like a dentist, and the next one is wearing a dental mouth prop. whatever their visitor deals with at work? If a retail worker wanders in, do >> You have to go. >> Movie takes 39 minutes and 42 seconds to

[11:25] remember that Elise Rainier is the star of this series. Also, if this lantern is why is it barely seen, used, or even mentioned for the rest of the movie? telling her boss, or at least reporting the assault by a patient, which by the

[11:38] for your cop boyfriend to lock him up. Burying the address at the back of the Pinterest-on-paper mood board from hell was an unnecessarily dramatic move to Also, at least probably should have gone with a smaller object like a posted

[11:51] note. Gemma is so inexperienced that she only brought back half the book, so it >> Mom, there's police outside. >> Gemma was rightfully reluctant to boyfriend, but now that the inattentive mom gene has been activated, she's ready

[12:04] without warning as their very first meeting, despite having already established that Liz with the cute dog is her usual babysitter. >> Going to find someone I met in a dream. >> If your goal was to come across as

[12:17] leaving the person in care of your child with no leads or closure if something Gemma. You nailed it in one sentence. >> I'm looking for someone. I think he wanted me to come here. >> People used to practice on pig skin, but

[12:32] >> Clare knew Gemma was coming, but instead of putting her at ease, she does the far more natural thing and delivers the creepiest unsolicited tattoo suggestion >> Grapefruit skin's just like ours. >> It's a weird flex, but sure.

[12:48] audience critique of the grapefruit plot detail in the movie itself. >> She died in 2011. >> Time for Gemma's orientation on who Elise is and what the further is. Gemma needs this information, sure, but this

[13:02] is our sixth goddamn induction. This meeting could have been an email to >> She lives in the further now. >> I'd be tempted to remove a scene if the movie gave me any indication that it understood the irony of that sentence.

[13:14] what's Elise doing between movies? Does she have any hobbies? Does she bake? I in the further. >> As soon as this rings, I want you to take off the headphones. Too long in there and other spirits can start

[13:27] >> There will be at least another minute or two of prep time including putting on an starting the timer now was a little premature. Possession presents as cliche. >> Those are not dreams, Gemma.

[13:42] >> I find that answer vague and unconvincing. >> You have the ability to travel into a place called the further. movies, feel free to tune out for the next 50 seconds. You will not be

[13:55] learning anything new. >> Gemma, you're seeing the dead. crunch here with her further journey, I feel like Elise should skip the dramatic to Gemma. >> A couple of weeks ago, they finally

[14:09] closed the door on their demons for good. But, when one door closes in the further, another one opens. >> Insidious might be the first franchise impossible to finish these movies with any kind of closure. It's just going to

[14:21] be a never-ending game of horror trope spooky door whack-a-demon. Also, I'm beginning to suspect that they're making up rules as they go just to justify sequels in some sort of vulgar money clutch dollar grab cash grasp. There

[14:33] should really be a term for this. >> And behind that new door is something >> Redundant revelations. I'm pretty sure the available context clues aren't hiding Mr. Rogers. >> You can bring things from the spirit

[14:46] world into the living world in physical form. Poltergeist, Insidious now felt the need to pull a Nightmare on Elm Street for good measure. Too bad, sucker. Black Phone 2 beat you to that. Insidious out

[14:58] of the further. Keep the [ __ ] up. >> You are what I call a courier. the living world and the further, and Elise gives her a delivery job title. package when it's a [ __ ] demon? >> They use a sedative to force their way

[15:12] >> You have to figure out how to protect yourself from the acolytes. solution to Gemma's problem with the acolytes, she could at least give her of those lamps and them off in the further? Worked on a whole bunch of

[15:26] nasties and Cyrus earlier. >> He's awakening your power. >> How he's able to do that and how Elise knows he's able to do that are clearly Insidious Hand Guide. A guide that is easily accessible by simply turning your

[15:39] >> Once he's back in your world, he'll make you bring others. demons we've already seen in the franchise. Cyrus is nothing if not committed to brand recognition. >> So she told you

[15:53] demons are going to take over the world? >> She didn't just tell me. It was a >> Oh, in that case, I'm all in. Please forgive my clearly outrageous >> Jim, we cannot just cut off some old people's oxygen.

[16:05] Nick is a cop dating a woman who has physical evidence of impossible suspicious neighbors. This is the rare horror plot where call the police still solves nothing. >> It is not the house that is haunted. It

[16:19] >> Aw, remember 15 years ago and that was an exciting twist. >> That's a very strange way of saying holy and yes, I know I'm not supposed to say outside my door. And I know I'm not supposed to say goddamn but holy

[16:35] red? That's kind of boring. Maybe they need to get whoever paints the doors at Monsters Inc. to help out. Give them a little variety. transdimensional murder ghosts is presented and then ignored in favor of

[16:50] locking them back up to wait for a future sequel. Maya learns the acolytes out of her mind so Gemma does the only motherly thing and shuts Maya in a room Maya doesn't freak the out and scream the house down.

[17:03] >> Good thing you're a police officer with access to a morgue and plenty of backup. Right, Nick? Right, Nick? Also, why is it that my freezer is at 103% capacity at any given time and yet movie

[17:15] they need it. >> I can think I was wrong to call this a closer to Bad Dreams, which was basically a Nightmare on Elm Street

[17:28] Jones. Clearly, this further needs some more original writers. You want me? >> It's unclear whether Cyrus Newgem was coming and instructed his acolytes to leave his propaganda videos running or

[17:41] while watching the Death Cult's Greatest Hits just for fun. >> CAN YOU DIG IT? CAN YOU DIG IT? >> CAN YOU dig it?

[17:54] pile of diapers should have been obvious the second she entered the house. Also, instead of the clearly working bathroom in the Sullivan's house? Was Cyrus's bathrooms? When the portrait is all red, does that mean Gemma's HP is down to

[18:09] belong here. >> If Cyrus can communicate with Gemma this acolytes for? All they do is bring unwanted attention to the situation, but in a house after killing the current residents AND ALL.

[18:23] >> THEY'RE FOLLOWING ME! >> ANGER AMPLIFIES A SUPERPOWER CLICHE. the human courier is A NECESSITY. >> GET AWAY FROM ME!

[18:35] >> I believe the line is stay away from me, you [ __ ] It's film class, right? get by, and yet Claire here is doing so well she can buy up an endless supply of grapefruits and waste precious tattoo ink when sketches would suffice. Also,

[18:50] unnecessarily obnoxiously elaborate and sticky. This movie has already been way >> So, this guy was killing people to prove to their loved ones he could talk to >> I will be infinitely more impressed if you talk to one of my loved ones who has

[19:03] already died than if you have to resort to creating new dead loved ones for me. >> They're going to go through with their plan tonight. because demons have apparently decided to respect the traditional third act

[19:16] he came from, and you're going to be the bait. plan, which we'll spend most of the remaining movie watching them carry out. presentation followed by a live demonstration.

[19:29] >> The acolytes have been in the further guarding that red door 24/7. >> Also, why would Cyrus pick these three [ __ ] to be the guards? Why not pick any number of demons who can't be pulled off their post by Nick the cop and a

[19:41] pair of craft scissors? Also, also, why wouldn't Cyrus just guard the door anything better to do right now? Where even is he? WASHING HIS TIGHTS. >> WHICH means that Gemma and Elise can get

[19:55] into the red door. >> Movie fails to identify the space behind further further to avoid confusion. Movie seems to have no interest in avoiding confusion. Also, since we've established there are now multiple red

[20:07] doors in the further, it's really just a red door, not the red door. And honestly, Insidious A Red Door followed up by Insidious Another Red Door is a hilariously missed opportunity. >> Syrus is going to follow you right in.

[20:19] trapped behind that door, why would he ever follow Gemma in? Why not just wait, a different night? It's like they think Cyrus will fall for all this out of sheer respect for the effort. >> What's inside? Elise says that every

[20:32] >> Sounds like Elise hasn't got a Scooby-Doo what's inside. >> But you have something Cyrus doesn't. >> Syrus literally has one of these. It's

[20:44] >> You know how sometimes you get a toothache? >> Is it like watching this movie? >> Listen to me. I am doing everything that scared of me again, okay? >> Not at this moment, you're not. Gemma

[20:59] house, which is sensible, but then she places her with a neighbor on the same block as the cult's lookout house, which is the supernatural equivalent of moving one cabin over on the Titanic. >> I love you, my

[21:14] that was a really insensitive moment for their neighbor to shut the door. Nick wears his cop uniform to perform a B&E without a warrant. Also, why would the they've been found out? Sure, they need somewhere to sleep, but move one house

[21:26] end up hiding in the floorboards, meaning they knew they were at risk in >> Are you ready? >> What happens if she says no? Does Cyrus review Claire's papaya point presentation one more time? The acolytes

[21:41] and the used diapers in the living room because living in filth is one of the >> Hey. >> They killed the Sullivans. me or anyone else who has ever seen a horror movie or really any movie.

[21:54] >> We have to go now. >> Okay, but why? Why is now more now-y than any other now up until now? >> I know this place. entire movie has been said so far. The source of this sense of wonder in your

[22:07] >> My? >> Your mom's. we've seen so far happened while Gemma's mom was unconscious and not mom-ing. >> First time we saw this scene, Gemma comes to the kitchen after her mom

[22:21] considering we now know Ingrid was calling her toward the slender goth. >> He came after her first. >> But this demon was only able to escape after Elise helped the Lamberts close their door, which was only 2 weeks ago.

[22:33] he'd been locked away for a long, long time. So how was he able to come after Gemma's mom in 19 goddamn 1999? Are we time traveling now? Because that's the only thing that makes sense. And guess what? It makes it make even less sense.

[22:46] >> If you won't bring me back, I'll make her do it. sacrifice to protect her daughter. That is a meaningful revelation, but I'm still sending her mic drop. The twist explains the plot, not the parenting.

[22:58] >> Wherever you go, I go. >> Cyrus, Insidious 6's new demon flavor, death, which changes nothing. Mainly their phone once during this runtime didn't predict that.

[23:11] >> Fine, I'll go along with what the film is setting up. The further further has been trapped is actually Ingrid's ghost memory. But that still offers no explanation for why this Ingrid memory space would pop open when the unrelated

[23:25] red door containing a completely unrelated demon. her. [laughter] >> Kids, if she had this gift and you have >> Third act twist is obvious to everyone other than the people it should be most

[23:39] >> Will you get her out of here? >> The answer is a vague head wobble before changing the subject, which is weird cuz if Cyrus can use Gemma to enter the real her mom back? Look, if there are drawbacks to doing this with non-evil

[23:52] characters, now would be the time TO TELL US. >> HOW ARE THE ACOLYTES SITTING UP AWAKE IN THE REAL world getting a live further? >> Nick, we're out of time. Where is the

[24:05] last place they think anyone would look? >> My guess would be Knob Lick, Kentucky, but this film doesn't have the balls for that to be the answer. place Nick thinks of. >> Follow my voice.

[24:19] >> There is no time for a gentle journey, Claire. Just taser Gemma awake like they've been doing with the acolytes. >> My radiant child, let me breathe the air again. >> Cyrus had two adult couriers and a

[24:32] 20-year head start, but his winning strategy is ultimately to ask a child. eventually discovers the kid has the admin password. Scene does not contain a flashback compilation confirming that this was actually all Maya's evil plot

[24:45] dog. >> [panting] the closet tactic. There's no way a demon from another dimension could break what you get for letting kids watch Halloween too young.

[25:00] >> WITNESSING THE EVENTS OF THIS FILM so far and then expecting this to do anything but get you killed. Also, Nick survives this. >> Exhausted sigh. >> Wait, you're not coming?

[25:13] >> Again, no idea why Gemma's superpower of resurrection isn't being used on Elise deal for the meaning of life and death as we know it. she's going at the end of all this. >> I feel like Gemma should be more

[25:25] saying she's going to heaven ambiguity of this answer. >> Go where? Did you not hear the part about them being everywhere? We made it, What should we do with our new freedom? Same we did before, I guess. Just around

[25:40] else. A plethora of demons will all get in each other's way and play with their food just long enough for Cyrus to step in and spoil their fun for good. You Gemma an internal memo instead of leaving it to their stupidity.

[25:53] >> Bring her to me. >> Premature shotgun [ __ ] abrasion. >> I'm helping her. >> Why wasn't this plan A? I don't remember seeing this anywhere on the mango plan. The demons have been pulling rats out of

[26:05] the walls to eat, but the dog somehow survives. The hubris of thinking that movie well enough to applaud this callback that's not even delivered in >> He's okay. It is I come. >> Setting us up for an emotional sacrifice

[26:18] free card built in. Gemma pulls an end of Oak Street and manages to go from entire house in the course of just one movie. Also, I feel like these further superpowers are giving a lot of good grace to Gemma's intent. If I was in

[26:32] moved the entire house, but left the demons behind. As it is, the magic seems load-bearing quality that can't be separated from the house. >> Oops. Looks like you broke your promise. >> Getting snooty with the demon cult

[26:45] you. Also, he did not break his promise. He delivered on the promise and then all nothing stopping them from trying this again unless they decide to dogpile on >> [screaming] >> Hold the [ __ ] on. What in the name of

[27:01] Knob Lick, Kentucky is he doing here? That's the Lambert's demon. He's meant whole point of the last movie. A point reinforced by Elise in this movie. And if he escaped in the post-credit scene, what's with all the one red door at a

[27:14] time [ __ ] Is Elise just making this [ __ ] up as she goes or are the writers Oh. Since the mailbox flag has been up the whole movie, I'm now more curious mailman, which is about as damning a review as I can imagine.

[27:36] >> THAT'S YOUR HOME. ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME? ANSWER ME.