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Who Are You? I Didn't Invite You. Go to Hell! - No I'm Not a Human

0h 14m video Published Oct 17, 2025 Transcribed Jul 22, 2026 S Severina Soda
Intermediate 5 min read For: Fans of surreal, dark comedy and post-apocalyptic fiction.
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AI Summary

The video is a surreal, darkly comedic narrative set in a post-apocalyptic world where strange events occur, including anomalies with the sun and 'guests' emerging from the ground. The protagonist interacts with bizarre characters, deals with a zombie-like infestation, and embarks on a journey to the 'land of mushrooms' to stop a growing mycelium of malice.

[00:03]
Strange Events Begin

The protagonist is confronted by a neighbor who reports strange happenings with the sun and people crawling out of the ground, referred to as 'guests'.

[01:25]
Zombie Guests and Privileges

The neighbor mentions that the 'guests' (zombies) have privileges and dislike being called zombies. They are treated reverently.

[03:13]
News Report on Guests

A news report confirms contact with 'guests' and advises people to remain calm and stay indoors during the day.

[05:26]
Child's Disturbing Story

A child recounts how his mother killed his father after a strange encounter, indicating the guests' influence.

[09:35]
Death and Burial Rituals

A character mentions that death is frequent in the house and a burial ritual is needed. The protagonist accidentally kills a neighbor's daughter.

[11:01]
Mushroom Festival and Mycelium

The protagonist learns about a 'mushroom festival' and a mycelium that has become corrupted by malice, requiring a journey to the 'land of mushrooms'.

[12:09]
Journey to the Land of Mushrooms

The protagonist and a companion rush to the land of mushrooms to stop the mycelium before a giant mushroom covers the earth.

[13:30]
Too Late and Aftermath

They arrive too late; the mushroom has grown. The protagonist finds a child dead and reflects on the chaos.

The video presents a chaotic, absurdist narrative blending horror and dark humor, culminating in a failed mission to save the world from a malevolent fungal entity.

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"Title is a quote from the video, but it doesn't fully represent the surreal mushroom apocalypse plot."

Study Flashcards (5)

What are the 'guests' called by the characters?

easy Click to reveal answer

Zombies, but they dislike being called that.

01:25

What advice does the news give about the guests?

easy Click to reveal answer

Remain calm and do not leave home during the day.

03:13

What does the child say happened to his father?

medium Click to reveal answer

His mother killed his father after a strange encounter.

05:26

What is the 'mushroom festival'?

hard Click to reveal answer

A phenomenon where a mycelium grows due to accumulated malice, threatening to cover the earth.

11:01

What is the goal of the journey to the land of mushrooms?

medium Click to reveal answer

To stop the mycelium before a giant mushroom covers the earth.

12:09

💡 Key Takeaways

💡

Zombie Privileges

Reveals the absurd social dynamics of the post-apocalyptic world.

01:25
📊

Mycelium Corruption

Explains the central conflict: malice corrupts the mycelium, causing giant mushrooms.

11:01
🔧

Urgent Journey

Sets up the climax and the race against time.

12:09

✂️ Creator Tools: Viral Hooks

AI-generated clip ideas for Shorts based on the transcript

Neighbor's Zombie Encounter

45s

Starts with a tense, mysterious confrontation about zombies and the sun, immediately hooking viewers with horror and suspense.

▶ Play Clip

Zombie Etiquette Rant

50s

The character's sarcastic rant about zombie privileges and being 'canceled' is both absurd and relatable, perfect for comedic engagement.

▶ Play Clip

Game Night with Zombies

50s

A sudden shift to a board game with a zombie adds unexpected humor and creativity, surprising viewers and keeping them watching.

▶ Play Clip

Mushroom Festival Apocalypse

60s

The bizarre lore about mushrooms and malice creating a world-ending threat is highly original and educational, sparking curiosity and shares.

▶ Play Clip

Naked Man Mistaken for Heaven

50s

The absurd twist of confusing a naked intruder with a heavenly vision is shocking and hilarious, perfect for viral surprise reactions.

▶ Play Clip

[00:03] game. Now we're going to play it. Hello, neighbor. Long time no see, how's life. Who came here to chat? Go away. I didn't invite you. Who are you? Go [ __ ] yourself. I'm just an owl. Dedensay. Recluse. Hika. Crow's Bone. My

[00:17] cousin called me. According to their news. They say that something strange is happening to the sun fine. It's night. And about people crawling out of the ground. For some reason they are called Before, you didn't want to leave the house, and now even more so. What? What's wrong with the sun? And

[00:34] it either explodes, or there are flashes on it. Completely different things. We also have something strange in the sun in the marmot in the cold. Autumn has arrived. Come on, let me stay with you for one night just in case. I'll feel calmer this way.

[00:47] Pervert, go away. Don't worry about my wife and daughter. A good friend just came to visit me this afternoon. Why does your friend look after your wife and you look after me? I don't believe you. Strange guy. Go away. Even if you

[01:00] weren't weird, leave anyway. Go away, I don't like you. You leave my channel. Go away. Go away. You are disgusting, you stink. Go away, degrade somewhere else and decay. Not at my place, please, not

[01:12] near my entrance. Go away. Go to your home. How did you even open the door? I'm calling the police. Let's get out of here. That's it, this is not my home anymore. I'm packing my things and leaving here. Damn, I'll have to talk to my neighbor. Beer Day.

[01:25] Okay, since you have a gift. Today we need to celebrate in this way at the hotels. Why do they treat him so reverently , as if these zombie guests have some kind of privileges? They're like, "We don't want to be called

[01:38] zombies. It's an insult. It insults me. I'll cancel you, [ __ ], for calling me a zombie. I'm not a zombie. They zombies. And don't worry about talking , they won't waste any energy.

[01:52] So talk as much as you want. I don't want to talk. Okay, that's all I've got for now. Oh, right, I almost forgot. Get a beer and get out of here. I'm going back home tonight. Write down my number so you can call. And you're not leaving. We just got a

[02:05] line installed. 760 750. We'll keep in touch. I don't want to remember. I forgot everything right away. Well, that's it . Have a beer and go to bed. Oh, it's Woke up, watched TV, had a beer and went to bed. You see

[02:20] ballerinas dancing elegantly, crossing the stage with strong yet graceful strides. Cool. Here Something's missing. Wait. Damn, so it fits here. Okay. Damn, everything fits here, but it's perfect, not exactly. I blocked the breakdown.

[02:46] Telegram isn't working, is it my fault or something? Take my wooden hands, kiss them, Take my wooden hands, kiss them, [ __ ].

[02:58] I think I checked him. No, whatever. Let's hand him over to her. We'll play a game. He made me something. There you have to roll dice and then move on objects. And now we have to build a road. Yeah, I'm not interested. Let's go. God forbid they

[03:13] eat him so he doesn't come back. Good afternoon. The news is on air. The active sun is not decreasing, and the crime rate has dropped significantly. Our studio just received an urgent message. I've turned into Mizulina again. An

[03:28] urgent message has been received about contact with guests. Eyewitnesses describe the external appearance of a person's behavior as existing. That's all. Remain calm, do not leave at home during the day. People

[03:42] come to my house and are like, "Can I stay the night?" And I have a stupid thing lying right by the entrance "Oh, sorry about the date." Damn, you can use this life hack in real life too . Cool. Did you see what's going on? And I

[03:55] have a thread. It can easily make money. I don't even have to worry about the sun at this cafe. You can make money. You need to figure it out. Figure it out with a scheme, you know? While it's possible to sit Move. Move, you know? Well, let's go? Come on in. You have it right here. Hello

[04:12] . Let me in, or what? Knock on your head . Dude, dude, excuse me, I'm banging on the door here, if only you saw what I saw. What interesting thing did you see? Oh, I saw. What interesting thing did you see? Oh, my God, they asked me to bathe me a

[04:27] my God, they asked me to bathe me a hole, well, for a funeral. There he stands, there he stands, waiting for me to finish. So I dig and dig, and he stands there. That's it, he stands there. I don't know, I just really saw something piping in him and I really wanted to

[04:42] say it out loud. Okay, come in, because he's piping. That's the only reason we're letting him in. A yellow. You know how when you dig too deep, sometimes you find more than just too deep, sometimes you find more than just bones.

[04:55] Kore will come. will come. Okay, live, creature.

[05:11] myself. I'm the most important member. I don't understand. Are these perfect white or not? Come Eyes. Eyes are normal. Eyes are just eyes. Not red. So there's nothing to pick on. Everything is calm.

[05:26] Hello. Let me in. He's not hysterical, he's having a stroke. And He's not hysterical, he's having a stroke. And my dad's mom and dad

[05:38] my dad's mom and dad killed dad. That they were sitting calmly with dad in the kitchen, and then she did something

[05:50] sitting calmly with dad in the kitchen, and then she did something to go through. I want to go to mommy. Tell me what happened. I don't know Oh, wait, I don't

[06:02] happened. I don't know Oh, wait, I don't know. They came in and started talking. Dad said you can't do that. They said what they said. Show me your eyes. Can you look inside your

[06:15] eyes? You'll see everything I think there. Then I'll think carefully. Don't The eyes are clear. You're pissing me off. I'm dying. Daddy,

[06:29] you're pissing me off. Is it dirty or not ? It seems dirty. They're because he's digging. Well, my ass got really itchy. I scratched it. And I look, there's [ __ ] under my fingernail.

[06:42] [ __ ] under my fingernail. Where the hell do you find such small stuff? Oh, finally. Well, I just killed the girl . I need a check. Okay, I won't kill you.

[06:59] guest phenomenon could be of an infectious nature or something else. biological threat. What do you want? You probably should have just taken the cat probably should have just taken the cat and bent her over. What is it? Yeah

[07:12] . Yeah. Wow, do you want to read? Well, I'm here with my fan. Well, baby, I can't pet you. I'm working now, you understand? Sorry. Dog petting break. Be patient. I'll pet the dog. She can't stand it.

[07:26] Oy, stinky. Oy, stinky. What a stinky dog ​​my dog ​​is. What a sweet stinky one. Okay, that's it, I'm fed up with you. I kicked the guests out. I said I didn't have a gun. Damn,

[07:42] what drastic measures. I can't throw the guy out of the house, kick him out. But I can only shoot him. Sorry, I did n't mean it. No, I can just leave. No, you can't. How several teenagers are spending time outside the window by the field

[07:56] . And we saw the picture after. And that girl I killed, that's the neighbor's daughter.

[08:13] n't remember. Sosyo, don't tell me. I shot her because she was screaming loudly. I didn't like her. Damn, what's wrong with your face? Your mouth is like her. Damn, what's wrong with your face? Your mouth is upside down. There's karma 69. There they are, like

[08:26] fish following each other. There were prison guards in your family and reincarnations . Give this space. You're just repeating the experience of past reincarnations. You need to forgive and accept this now. You're carrying a cult, damn it.

[08:39] Gypsies, go away. That means you're not interested in working on yourself, in becoming the best version of yourself. Younger, more beautiful, more perfect. The

[08:51] luckiest version of yourself. I'll start giving you affirmations for diarrhea.

[09:21] [laughter] If he's a zombie, he's a very strange one.

[09:35] Someone of mine was killed. It smells like death. Someone is going to be killed now. So, in short, who are the corpses? You, then, were those. Today is the day of what? Children's Day. And why the hell give me your teeth? Well, they are white.

[09:53] La. Okay, let him live for now. Yeah, your house Okay, let him live for now. Yeah, your house suits me. I can really feel it. Death Death really likes your house. I don't know how often someone has died in your house.

[10:05] Someone dies here every day, very badly. And very quickly, unexpectedly. We need to perform the burial ritual. What's going on with you anyway? In any case, please let my people in and protect them. I'm burning with

[10:18] the desire to take care of someone. Then it might happen that you'll finally catch fire. Diplomacy Day. I'm screwed. Why did you have to kill them? No, damn, there was a guy in a wheelchair. He clearly would

[10:32] n't have been able to run far. The easiest target. How are my people? How are my people? Oh, fine. Well, they're alive. Wait a minute, they're gone. You took We have an opportunity. Goodbye. That's it, they'll set me on fire. I'm full of strength.

[10:48] I'm full of energy. I don't want to sleep. I'm ready for accomplishments. I'm ready for anything. Today is such a wonderful day. I'm ready for anything. I can do it, I can move mountains. Oh, that's it, time to sleep. That's it, I'm really [ __ ] up today. [ __ ]. It's

[11:01] been a tough day, for sure. Looks like the mushroom festival is coming after all. There's such a mess inside the mycelium that the ritual had no effect. I ate mushrooms for nothing . Why didn't the ritual help? No purpose. It seems like it's completely out of order. When

[11:15] stones and malice form in its connections, they interfere with metabolism. Mushrooms, like the human liver, remove this muck so that the mycelium can thrive. It seems there's been so much malice lately that the size of the mushroom exceeds all

[11:29] my imagination. I didn't want this, but it looks like you and I will have to go to the land of mushrooms. Let's go from here. Don't let the simple name cloud your mind, my dear friend. In human language it may

[11:41] sound like something cheerful, but in mushroom language it's a very inhospitable place. You can't imagine where this cultist would come to kill me now . Come on. I'm ready to leave here. Yes, we won't find the festival there, but the mycelium will

[11:56] perish without us if we don't intervene. A person should never set foot there. But we have to, to stop the mushroom festival. Are you ready to go to the land of mushrooms? Yes. Let's go. Well done, good young man. Pack your things and wait a second.

[12:09] Can you show me the essence? Midnight. Holy [ __ ] , we're late, let's run faster , we're late, let's run faster while the gates to the land of mushrooms are open.

[12:21] grow very quickly if things are bad, literally by the hour. It's scary to imagine what will happen to them after midnight. And the bigger the mushrooms, the

[12:33] after midnight. And the bigger the mushrooms, the more lumps of malice in the mycelium. So many have accumulated that the mushroom cap will cover the entire surface of the earth and nothing will be left now. The goal is to put this malice somewhere

[12:48] now. The goal is to put this malice somewhere . apple seeds were supposed to remind it of the kinship between people and mushrooms. But it seems

[13:02] the mycelium has gone mad from the malice that has accumulated within it. The land of mushrooms is somewhere out there. We need to stop the mycelium before the mushroom grows completely.

[13:15] grows completely. Run after me straight underground. [music] I'm a mushroom. I'm a mushroom. I'm a mushroom. I'm the flu. I'm the flu. I'm the flu. I'm the flu. I'm a mushroom I'm a mushroom. I'm a mushroom. I'm a mushroom. I'm the flu. I'm the flu. I'm the flu. I'm the flu. I'm a mushroom . I'm a mushroom. I'm a mushroom.

[13:30] . I'm a mushroom. I'm a mushroom. Oh, we're too late, my friend. Okay then. What can we do? We lost. So you have some kombucha left?

[13:44] crying too. Everything is fine at home. Happyhouse is looking for the children. go? This A child. There he is. How did he die? I don't

[13:59] give a damn, really. So, a shot rang out in the milky fog. So, that's about a child, anyway. That's about heaven. That's about mushrooms. Oh, wait, no. That's a naked man who snuck into

[14:12] my house. That's not heaven. That's a naked man who snuck into my house. How naked man who snuck into my house. How could I have gotten it wrong?

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