After This Video, Your Shyness with Any Girl Will Disappear

[00:02] interact with a girl, whether at school, university, or work, and you felt extremely nervous and shy, to the point where you felt like a fool, stuttering and completely lacking in confidence, then I want you to give me exactly 10

[00:16] minutes of your time. I'm going to tell you honestly whether your nervousness with the girl is normal or a flaw. And if it is a flaw, will you stay like this your whole life, unable to interact with any girl, constantly scared and nervous, your face turning all sorts of colors? Honestly, I won't lie to you, yes,

[00:32] you could stay like this your whole life unless you do the few things you're about to hear in this video. Then you'll transform from someone who can't string two words together into someone everyone wishes they could talk like. But the important question [music] is, haven't you asked yourself Before,

[00:46] why don't you know how to deal with the opposite sex? and our people with truth, for You are the best of judges. This particular episode will be controversial

[00:58] because today I'm going to talk about a topic that many people take in a bad or completely wrong way when they talk about it, or people are just afraid to talk about it altogether. But we're going to talk about it together today for the purpose of raising awareness and learning how to deal with situations like

[01:12] this. So that you understand what I'm saying and don't feel like I'm speaking in riddles, today we're going to talk about how to deal with the opposite sex: how to talk, when to talk, what to say if you do talk, and what boundaries you should set between you and the opposite sex if you're a boy dealing with a

[01:26] girl or if you're a girl dealing with a boy. Because I know that one of the most difficult things for boys, especially during adolescence, which is before university. Or, at the beginning of university, he might not know how to interact with the opposite sex, how to interact with a girl. You feel like

[01:38] everything is incredibly difficult, but at the same time, you see people who handle it with ease. For example, a friend of yours, and it's very simple for them. But when you're put in that situation, your face turns all sorts of colors, you get nervous and very shy, and you don't

[01:51] know how to stand up straight. Your tongue falters, and the words feel heavy on your tongue. You might even start talking, but because of all the interaction, you forget what you were going to say, or you don't even know what to say, even though the situation is perfectly normal. You're talking about something perfectly

[02:03] normal. So, if these things happen to you when you interact with any girl, do you have a flaw that you need to fix? And how is it that other people, whether they're your friends or easily while you find it so difficult?

[02:15] You absolutely need to know all of this right now, and not only that, but by the end of this episode, this fear will have completely disappeared from your heart. When you talk to anyone of the opposite sex, you'll be at the peak of your self-confidence. By the way, this is n't just for guys. But before we start anything, this is a

[02:29] warning: if you think this episode is going to tell you how to date or get to know a girl in an illicit way, then you're watching the wrong video. This episode's purpose is to teach you when and how to deal with the opposite sex and what boundaries should exist between you. But if you're expecting

[02:43] anything contrary to what God has forbidden, I don't think this episode will be very helpful for you. Now, a few days ago, I remembered one of the worst situations I've ever been in. And even though it's been 10 years, I swear to God, every time I remember it, my brain goes

[02:55] blank. And by the way, this situation is the reason I did This episode. Anyway, so as not to make it too long, let me quickly tell you what happened to me . In 2015, in the middle of winter, around this time, If anyone here is good at math, they will know exactly how old I

[03:08] was at that time. Anyway, one day, which I consider one of the worst days of my life, my math teacher at the time, while I was sitting in class, came closer to me and told me to stand up. I didn't understand why I should stand up, so I thought, "Why?" Then he started

[03:20] yelling loudly, "Stand up, I said!" and yelling really loudly. I was terrified. What was going on? What was the problem? Because of how loud he was, the whole group around me was scared, not just me. Anyway, he kept telling me to go outside. I said, " Talk to me, sir! What happened? I

[03:33] want to understand!" But he kept yelling really loudly, "I said go outside!" So I wouldn't go outside until I understood what was going on. What had I done? Then, guys, he grabbed my arm and dragged me outside. Oh my God! How terrifying! Then he told me, "Okay, open

[03:45] I was still young, in first grade. In my class, I was afraid she'd start crying. If I wanted to know why I was being hit, what did I do? Open your hands together. "But sir, explain to me, what did I do?" He insisted I open my hands together so he could hit me first. Anyway, I opened my hands, and he put his hand

[03:59] on my shoulder and looked at the whole group and said, " This guy will be an example to anyone who thinks of doing what he did yesterday." Your mind was racing at that moment, so I asked him, " I'll never forget how many times I was hit. I got 20 lashes on my hands. Of course, I didn't

[04:14] cry. I was young and didn't understand why I was being hit at all. Then the teacher put his hand on another shoulder and looked at the whole group and said, " This guy was rude to your classmate yesterday. He said something incredibly rude to her." Of course, the first thing you'll do when you hear those words is...

[04:27] In your mind, I've done something terrible, and in reality, I did, but I wasn't aware of it, and I never imagined the consequences would be this bad. To put it simply, a week before that fateful day, I also had a math class, but I had a situation that day,

[04:41] so I couldn't go. I called the I said, "Thank God, I'm fine. But, teacher, I won't be able to come to the next class because something came up, and I have to travel." He said, "Okay, no problem, but the most important thing is to make a copy of the papers for the class

[04:56] you won't be attending because the next class has an exam for your whole group, and you'll be taking it with them. So, yes, I'll allow you to be absent, but you'll still take the exam with them." I said, "Okay, who will have the papers?" He said, "The papers will be with a girl named..." Of course, we'll highlight this name in

[05:09] the editing, but it's a girl whose name starts with the letter T. I told him, "Okay, great. I have a social studies class in a few days, and she'll be there, so I'll tell her I need to take the paper to photocopy it." He said, "Okay." So, a few days later, I went to the social studies class I told you

[05:21] about. The girl was there, and the math teacher had already told her that Shehab would be coming to take the paper to photocopy it. Everything was going perfectly up to this point—a very ordinary story. The strange part of the story is what you'll hear now. As Shehab at that time, I didn't know how to

[05:34] interact with any girl at all. I was incredibly shy, to the point that I couldn't even ask for something very simple. I'd get flustered and nervous, and I'd go into a terrifying state of anxiety. So, while I was talking to the teacher on the phone, I told him, "Teacher, please let her know I'll be in the

[05:47] Because I was too shy to see the girl and say that to her, the teacher told her, and go to the girl after class and ask her for the papers so I could photocopy them. It was a very trivial and simple situation, meaning it didn't require anything, but at that moment, I honestly felt like I was going to apply to the

[06:02] military academy. I was sitting in class, very nervous, wondering what to say to her, how to approach her, and how to get her to know me. how to approach her when I was going to propose! I was just going to get some papers from her to photocopy. Then I asked myself, should I call her in front of everyone, or wait until everyone in the

[06:14] group had left before calling her alone? Of course, I had the option of calling her while the whole group was there, which was obviously impossible. Anyway, the social studies class ended, and I was supposed to call her at that moment, so I just sat there for a while, waiting for the whole group to leave and for the girl

[06:28] papers from her so I could photocopy them. Anyway, the group left, and I didn't know how to approach her. The girl was standing a little way from me, and she noticed me. I was supposed to come over and get the papers from her. She was standing there wondering why I hadn't come.

[06:41] So, I gathered all my strength and decided to take the papers from her. It was really simple, you know? As I walked towards her, my heart was pounding, I was nervous, and my whole body was sweating. You know how it is, even though it was really simple. The closer I got, the more nervous I became. Finally, I reached her, and

[06:58] come all the way here and give you the papers?" I asked her if I could photocopy the papers, and she handed me about 20 sheets. The 20 sheets were supposed to have a specific order, but the problem was they weren't numbered. So, just wait and see what happened next. I need a pen to number

[07:11] these papers. I was so nervous I didn't even think about going back to my bag to get it because I'd left it far away. After numbering the papers, I decided to ask this girl for a pen. Out of shyness, my voice was very low, so I shyly asked her, "Can I have your pen?" Then, guys, the girl's

[07:24] face changed completely. She looked at me, scowled, and said, "What? What did you say?" I didn't understand what she was saying. Then, guys, she snatched the papers from my hand and walked away. Of course, because I was naive, I thought the girl was upset that I'd asked for a pen. But

[07:37] the surprise is what you're about to hear. What I found out later is that instead of asking for my pen because my voice was so nervous and shy, and very low, she heard me say, "Can I have your number?" So, of course, the girl... because someone who says something like that... This guy is so rude!

[07:50] And of course, the first thing I did when I got home was call the teacher. She told me, and then the scenario I'll never forget the details of it because it's probably the most embarrassing thing I've ever experienced in my life. At that moment, I was so upset with myself, not so much about the 20 lashes I got, but about why

[08:04] I was so embarrassed and shy and nervous, even though it was a normal situation. I realized then that I don't know how to interact with any girl, and that made me ask myself, am I the only one who doesn't know how to interact with girls or the opposite sex, or are all boys like me? There are

[08:17] people my age and younger who know how to interact and talk, and I'm the one who does n't know how to do any of that at all. Is what I'm experiencing normal, or are these people normal and I'm the one who's not? Is it normal that every time I have a situation that makes me feel awkward interacting with a

[08:30] girl, whether at school or work, or when something is necessary? If I'm dealing with it normally, I get very nervous, to the point that, for example, if I'm going to say something simple, I keep going over the situation in my mind as if I'm going to an exam. I get very nervous and my heart keeps beating so fast that it feels like it's going to

[08:43] burst out of my chest. My face gets dry and turns red, and as soon as I go to speak and ask for what I want, I find myself stammering and stuttering. I look stupid and unable to say what I want like normal people do. Of course, when the situation is over, I look

[08:56] very bad in front of myself, and the girl will definitely say after I leave, "What was that nonsense? He does n't know how to talk." So what is the solution for this excessive or exaggerated shyness? Of course, I've told your life story now, right? First of all, if you are going through or suffering from this issue, I

[09:09] completely understand your feelings. I am the one who can best understand you on this point and know that it bothers you because I feeling that you look stupid or that you don't have confidence in yourself or that you don't know how to talk. But in order to assess the issue correctly, we first need to know if this issue is normal or

[09:23] not. If the issue has reached an extreme level for you, meaning you don't know how to deal at all with any girl, especially when circumstances make you grow up in this way, and of course the interaction should be within the limits of religion and morals, then the issue here has a normal part and a problem part. The natural part is that you feel embarrassed.

[09:38] Look, everyone, there is no one in the world who, when dealing with the opposite sex, is not embarrassed. This is not normal. Whether it's from a boy to a girl or from a girl to a boy. Except of course for your mother, your sister, and your future wife. Even with other countries, if you focus on the relationship between you and those who are closest to you,

[09:51] you will find that there are also areas of shyness between you and them. Imagine that these are the people closest to you. So what about the stranger? It is natural that the more a person is a stranger to us, especially if they are of the opposite sex, the greater the area of ​​eclipse becomes. This is normal because we have already prohibited mixing of the sexes except in

[10:04] situations where it is absolutely necessary, where there is no other solution or escape. So, the shyness part is perfectly normal, but you should be able to manage it. However, when you find yourself feeling like you're going into battle when interacting with the opposite sex, when you're

[10:19] extremely nervous and feel overwhelmed, to the point of panic attacks, when you preparing for an exam—that's what's not normal. The reason for this excessive tension, anxiety, and fear often stems from childhood, specifically from childhood beliefs and upbringing.

[10:35] For example, let's put it simply: one of the biggest causes of this problem, subconsciously ingrained in our minds, is the idea that you're never enough. As a child, you were constantly compared to your cousin.

[10:48] You're compared to your brother, and the result of this comparison is always that you're not good enough. Look how smart your brother is and gets higher grades. You're not as intelligent as your cousin. You're more reserved and less pleasant to deal with than your other cousin. So, as a result of all the situations you keep going through, the

[11:01] idea that you're not good enough is planted in your mind, both outwardly, in your appearance, and worse, in your personality. Of course, from a young age, our parents teach us the boundaries of interaction with girls or the opposite sex, and that's not

[11:16] wrong at all. The problem lies in the way this information is conveyed to us from a young age. Religion tells us to interact in a way that's 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and these are the limits of interaction so that there's no temptation between boys and girls. Some parents turn these boundaries into prohibitions. In short, if

[11:30] you're a boy and you interact with... So, basically, you're morally corrupt. You shouldn't even be speaking to any girl, because if you do, you'll be considered rude. Consequently, most parents turn the rules about mixing genders into prohibitions, meaning you can't

[11:43] interact with them at all. So, in addition to the idea that you're not good enough, which was already planted in your subconscious, a new element has been added: intimidation. If you talk to any girl in general, in any context or on any topic, you'll be considered rude.

[11:58] All of this gets stored in your mind. And if you have some childhood traumas, things that happened that diminished your self-confidence, whether externally in your appearance or internally in your personality, then with time and age, when the idea of ​​being in a situation with a girl and interacting with

[12:13] her comes to mind, it's impossible. Your brain doesn't interpret it as a girl; it interprets it as a trial. It's all about her, and she'll judge everything about you. Your brain's mechanism actually activates error mode, even though you're entering a normal situation. But what's been implanted in your conscious mind is what makes you see the

[12:26] situation as wrong. So you find all the symptoms of anxiety appearing because you're entering a trial. You start thinking, "How will I speak? What will I say? How will I look? Oh no, I'm afraid I'll stutter while speaking! Oh no, the girl might make fun of me because of my appearance, because I'm short or

[12:39] overweight, or because of the way I speak and communicate with her in this situation!" So your brain keeps communicate with her in this situation!" So your brain keeps exaggerating the situation, and it really is that big of a deal. So you feel what you're feeling. Listen, Shehab, what you

[12:51] said exactly happens to me. You described me perfectly. Is there a solution to this problem? Of course, there is! What I'm about to say is for both boys and girls, so pay close attention. The first question is... We ask ourselves, when should I, as a boy, interact with a girl, and vice versa? The answer is

[13:04] simply when the situation requires interaction and we have no other option. For example, let's say you work somewhere and you need someone to help you with a specific point at work. If the employees working with you include a boy and a girl, if you are a boy, ask the boy, and if you are a girl,

[13:18] ask the girl. This is so that we don't put embarrassment on either side. At the same time, this is what God has commanded us to do in order to protect us as much as possible. Therefore, He has set limits for us in mixing. So, in a situation like this, as long as there is a boy, you ask the boy. So, when should you interact with the girl? If you really

[13:30] need something urgent and there's absolutely no option to talk to a boy—meaning there aren't any boys around, and you have no other choice—then naturally you'll interact, but within limits. This is the point we'll discuss. But before we get into the boundaries, you might already

[13:43] be nervous, as we mentioned, not knowing how to interact or speak, even though the girl is supposed to help you with what you're doing. The first thing you need to understand is that you're not going to be judged based on your looks, personality, clothes, or anything like that. Of course,

[13:56] these things are very important in communication skills, but if you're only focused on these things when you're interacting or talking to a girl, it's perfectly normal for your anxiety and hesitation to increase because of the point we discussed. So, what should you do? Focus on the situation,

[14:09] focus on the conversation that will take place between you and her, and focus on the fact that I... I'm going to ask for something and I want the answer, that's all. So, shift your focus away from the situation, your personality, your way of speaking, and your manner to the situation itself. This does n't mean you should neglect these things, but I'm telling you this so you don't get nervous or scared.

[14:24] Secondly, nobody is really paying attention to you.

[14:39] noticing even 2% of them. Can you imagine? Nobody is focused on anyone else, nobody is even noticing anything. Everyone is focused on their own problems and themselves. And even if someone is paying attention to you, so what? As soon as the situation is over, people forget. So, even if you did something wrong, don't kill yourself over it.

[14:53] someone what they ate four or five days ago, and they won't remember. What will they remember? He's still remembering the mistake course not. What I want to tell you is that if you're dealing with a girl, or vice versa, if you're a girl dealing with a boy, don't be anxious. Just relax. It's possible that the person you're

[15:07] talking to is the one who's anxious. You might be going in anxious, and the person you're going to is even more anxious than you. So you're both anxious about each other, and each of you is increasing your anxiety. All I can say on this point is to stay calm and natural, and focus on the situation. No one is

[15:19] focusing on you. The third thing is to get your mind to understand that if you're going to ask a girl for something, it's exactly the same as asking a boy for something, in terms of the tension, not in terms of the way you treat him. So, whether you're dealing with a boy or a girl, you should go in and ask politely and respectfully, and not want anything

[15:32] other than what you're asking for, and focus on that. Anything else that comes up while you're asking a girl for something... That's up to you here, but if you're asking for something, focus on the situation. Good evening. I just want you to tell me, if it's not too much trouble, how to do something like that, using

[15:45] your normal tone, your natural way of speaking, and your natural reactions. You're talking to a human being, just like everyone else. The fourth thing is, don't give the person—whether you're a boy dealing with a girl, or a girl dealing with a boy older than her, or even if you're a boy dealing

[15:58] with a boy, or a girl dealing with a girl—that doesn't mean we should belittle the person. Always remember that the person in front of you is a human being, just like you. They can't harm or weak, and all humans are equal, no matter who they are. One is a boss, and the other

[16:13] sleeps on the street. Both are human beings, and both are vulnerable. So don't give anyone more importance than they deserve. If you're interviewing someone in HR, someone is bothering you, or someone is being difficult. Don't be afraid of anyone, and don't give anyone more importance than they deserve. The fifth thing is to expose yourself. Expose yourself by talking to many

[16:27] strange people and engaging in conversations with them. Of course, they should be guys like you, not girls. Don't go around doing this and tell yourself you're practicing self-esteem. Why expose yourself in this way? Because repeated exposure will help you, over time, to give it its proper perspective. Expose yourself to anything and everything; it will

[16:39] always reduce fear and anxiety. The more exposure you have with awareness, the less anxiety you'll feel, and the more your self- confidence will increase. Make this a rule in your life: if you're afraid of something, and you know it's not wrong or forbidden, throw yourself into it. You won't kill it, I swear. For example, I'm currently afraid to give a

[16:53] presentation in front of a large group of people, even though I know that doing something like this will benefit me and increase my self-confidence, not harm me. So, what should I do in this situation? I should protect myself with awareness and knowledge, and observe people. Those who give presentations, how do they talk? What

[17:05] mistakes did they make? Sit and watch a lot, read a lot about the topic, and then start exposing yourself to the situation repeatedly. The first time will always be the hardest, but if you do it correctly and you're happy with it, your self-confidence will soar, and your fear and anxiety will gradually decrease

[17:20] until they reach a certain level. This, of course, applies to your way of dealing with and communicating with people—communication skills. your way of dealing with and communicating with people—communication skills. Learn how to develop your communication skills. Learn how to talk to

[17:32] strangers, whether male or female. You'll find that things gradually fall into place for you. But the most important thing is that all of this is within the framework that pleases God, the framework of religion and nothing else. This episode was your guide God, the framework of religion and nothing else. This episode was your guide on how to deal with the opposite sex, and as always,

[17:46] on how to deal with the opposite sex, and as always, don't forget to share.