Everything Wrong With Ready or Not 2: Here I Come In 30 Minutes Or Less

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[01:16] I'm suing them for turning in the same homework twice, also thinking this will work as a recap after a seven-year gap between movies. It's tedious for the movie, and goddamn useless for anyone who didn't. Replacing the satisfying

[01:29] rock edge of Stereo Jane's cover of Love Me Tender with the sappier, less Still Love Me, which isn't even thematically relevant. Well, who still love who? Will new husband Alex still love Grace? No, he will not. He's dead.

[01:43] >> Jesus Christ, what happened to you? >> In-laws. >> Undermining the prior film's final line, which already wasn't the mic drop the script seemed to think it was, with this insane wah-wah of a follow-up question.

[01:56] They've hidden a cut melding the old footage with the new in the bounce detected by watching the blood pattern on Grace's face morph. I would be impressed, but it just reminds me that they waited 7 years to make a sequel

[02:09] at all. >> Ready? 1 2 3 medical professional, but the dragging the patient away before even checking is actually an additional cult member trying to finish the job the previous

[02:22] >> Stay with us. >> is happening here? She is covered in over to see if any of it's hers. It's as if we're missing an entire scene where it cosplay as an ambulance. >> Grace, clear.

[02:35] her. I know that of these EMTs have no clue that a defibrillator should never be used through clothing. Don't you hate it when your cardiac arrest-inspired flashbacks take the form of a traumatic, yet chronological recap of the last 24

[02:48] no way the hospital would have left these contact lenses in. Honestly, I'm night's literal bloodbath of festivities. >> Being surprised that you're in handcuffs after being discovered as the only

[03:00] fire combo meal. >> You're being detained by the Woolbury arson and murder. >> Making an entire ass sequel just to contradict the ending of our Ready or Not since video seems petty at best.

[03:13] that wasn't yours. >> At least some of that blood had to be blood from the gunshot wound and chest stabbing completely missed that lovely Look at you. >> What are you doing here?

[03:26] filmographically impossible to have a sequel without a surprise sibling >> Well, I'm still your emergency contact. >> We'll find out that Faith was 15 when contact since. So, when exactly did she become her emergency contact?

[03:40] >> Nitpickers. >> What happened? >> Well, yeah, if you tell her the [ __ ] truth, but Grace could very easily include all the [ __ ] about of Domas being part of a crazy rich person cult

[03:52] spontaneously pureed bodies. >> But I drove all the way out to Bump, >> Whatever the [ __ ] Connecticut did to be catching strays in this sisterly reunion unspecified. >> Not here for a reunion.

[04:05] >> case, coming to the hospital that you know she's been admitted to was an odd >> I'm a social media coordinator. I live in a kick-ass one-bedroom and I Derek. >> Every Gen Z Pinterest board somehow

[04:17] to get it. >> Honestly, it would have been weirder if she'd had to [ __ ] her sister's husband to secure her hot boyfriend Derek. Also, board games as much as the next guy, but I couldn't tell you a single thing about

[04:30] the heir to the Parker Brothers fortune. Oh, I've just been informed that Parker know that? Exactly. That's how little the general public cares about >> I saw you together once at the Whole Foods on 25th and 7th.

[04:43] >> There is a Whole Foods in that area, but it's technically closer to 24th and 7th than 25th and 7th. Anyway, what really matters is that it isn't the closest Whole Foods to Murray Hill, where Faith claims she lives. Of course, we'll find

[04:55] but dammit, she's also had 7 years to get this lie right. to pull a card. >> Previously on Ready or Not. them to like me because they were going to be my new family.

[05:08] you multiple times that he wanted nothing to do with them. Oh yeah, [ __ ] I did my homework. Well, I rewatched the Cinema Sins video. Like Cronenberg. Holy [ __ ] And the award for the most generic and least informative

[05:21] >> Approve the ceasefire. >> Unless this news channel is also sure how they've managed to run with this headline so quickly. Discount Elijah. Even holier >> The Le Domas's are no more.

[05:34] Lawyer. Considering how rare it is for the hide-and-seek card to be pulled, it out over the seekers. So, shouldn't his reaction be one of shock rather than >> Can you find my children? >> It's 10:00 p.m. Do you know where your

[05:49] >> Twitter text operation. Chen Jiang has a goat-legged satyr wearing a top hat as her phone's lock screen, and Ignatius production company has a goat man as its these people's personality must be

[06:02] >> Yeah, cuz actually my job it's just beach. Knights. In case you confused it with Madrid, Connecticut. In case you South Wales, New Zealand. In case you confused it with London, Colorado.

[06:15] Discount Sarah Michelle Gellar. Holy [ __ ] THE HOLY VAMPIRE slaying holy >> The bride survived. >> Rumor has it that every time a movie mentions the bride, somehow, somewhere Uma Thurman's feet are degloved.

[06:28] Kids, also Ready or Not 2 robs us of the opportunity to see David Cronenberg hide-and-seek, and the universe is worse off for it. Hospitals who remove the but half-assed the hair clean up. >> I can't wait for you to tell me about

[06:42] >> Imagine getting a head start on your other cult members and blowing it by actual target. Also, Grace and Faith sure are lucky that Wilkinson's throwing knives instead of a machine gun, nerve gas, or tactical nuke. Also,

[06:57] here I come. Also, there must be rules about playing their murder game in need to kill every witness in this hospital? As we watch Grace aggressively slam into this door, I have some questions about when exactly we are. It

[07:10] seems that the elder Danforth was updated the morning after the Le Domas told the rest of the family. It's then logical to assume Cocaine Can left New Jersey ASAP for the 3 to 4-hour road trip to Connecticut, meaning we have

[07:23] the day after the initial hide-and-seeking, which brings me back to Grace slamming into this door as if she isn't nursing a puncture wound to the shoulder and a gunshot wound to the hand she picked up maybe 16 hours

[07:35] I know cocaine will do heinous [ __ ] to a person, but I still don't know why he save him from the rules [ __ ] him into a smoothie. >> Does seem pretty unlikely, doesn't it? But the studio guys need a tribute and

[07:48] But the studio guys need a tribute and this IP goat is still RIPE FOR MILKING. unbalanced when the seeker can just teleport wherever he wants. now? >> Be fair, you didn't even tell her she

[08:00] as saying, "Not so good at Olympic curling, now?" and then stabbing her. Deus ex blood cockina? Also, the members of this cult have only ever exploded after they've broken some element of the deal. Not a single one has or will be

[08:13] break. I mean, what if he missed or bailed at the last second? Why not blow come here and kill her? I guess we'd have an 18-minute movie with a very would be very satisfied with that. >> Can't fight in this gown.

[08:28] >> Grace getting back into the bloody wedding dress almost feels like the just going to be the first movie all over again. The reason I say almost is because this is the last attempt at any self-aware winky winky. Faith stands

[08:41] instead of helping her sister pull up the zip, which would have been agony to do alone given the whole stab wound in her shoulder that HAPPENED PROBABLY 60 clothes, but I will die before I run around in anything other than these

[08:54] The lawyer and his posse really bet all their chips that Grace would be running the stairs, didn't they? >> Looks like Mr. Wilkinson tried to kill the girl before the game could begin. And condemned his entire bloodline to a

[09:08] >> Yet, they withheld from viewers all the glorious reaction shots to Bill's family presumably, at least in some cases, public places. of Mr. R Beel's rules. >> Is a secondary consequence exploding

[09:21] >> And who might you be? >> Couldn't she just be a random patient or Why would he assume that she has any connection to Grace? going to make it. >> There is at least a 41% chance that this

[09:34] >> Unfortunately, we have a gas leak. >> ARE YOU [ __ ] KIDDING ME? >> BLAMING THE MESSENGER FOR THE GAS LEAK. ALSO, why are the billionaire world evacuation? >> Your grace goes a long way.

[09:47] Grace? Does the movie realize it just made a funny? I don't think it did and I >> What's the Wi-Fi password? >> Spoiled brat cliche is only interested in the Wi-Fi password cliche. Also, why does the spoiled brat cliche look to be

[09:59] row for the shot, but realistically the [ __ ] kid would be sat in the back >> May I speak to his father? >> Playing the pronoun game with your prey. >> One second. I I just got to take a quick selfie before we start.

[10:12] >> Every single one of these rich [ __ ] has to be strumming their [ __ ] guitars to 11 just in case we were in danger of feeling any empathy for them and or chunked. >> This girl bested the Ladomuses and Bill

[10:26] against the Ladomuses, their own stupidity handled 90% of the legwork and himself out of the game. >> Wait. Wait. Wait. So, does that mean the field, yeah. >> Jesus, this ancient rich [ __ ] even

[10:40] had a loophole in place for twins? Also, we'll find out that the oldest family So, unless they came out simultaneously, one of them is definitely older than the the same time. >> I am the sole attorney for Mr. LaBelle.

[10:53] strangely. >> Your organization is led by a council >> Thinking every successful kill them all movie needs a sequel that expands the cabal of secret slayers. The John Wickening of all things is upon us.

[11:07] >> On the council, there is one seat with more power than the others. And, believe it or not, you've been given an opportunity to win the high seat. >> Let's get this straight. Sometime way in the past, Mr. LaBelle or Satan or

[11:19] families and gave them the keys to the world. Then, he decided to make a ton of result in said families dying horribly under very specific circumstances. One such rule might just result in some poor random soul actually leading said

[11:33] organization, but only if they win two games of hide-and-seek. Why does Satan GIVE A SEXY [ __ ] ABOUT any of this? >> It's very rare that someone survives a game, so it comes with this reward. >> Calling being involuntarily reinserted

[11:45] you still have a hole in your hand a reward and adding your sister's likely death to the balance as the cherry on top. Man, Satan is a [ __ ] >> This clause is a [ __ ] stupid. >> Titus would be litigious at stupidly

[11:58] >> You never know. Mrs. Le Domasque could win. >> No. >> Mocking someone at the expense of >> Your sister's existence was quite a surprise.

[12:13] family. >> And the families controlling the world's her word for that instead of investigating it for themselves. Although, that would require explaining why it even [ __ ] matters that she has

[12:25] feel like [ __ ] of course. >> Grace and Faith. >> Your name is Titus. >> You will play that game again. >> This time with the council members. >> Ready or not two, just like the last

[12:39] time, but you know, more. >> Now, we must fill the seat by dawn or Mr. LaBelle will be very upset. >> But there are two seats missing. Why [ __ ] >> I'm still not playing.

[12:53] >> I don't know what she expected would come from I'm not playing. That they'd let her go? That they'd kill her, but let her sister go? I hear satanic cults that. >> The game will begin at exactly 2:31 p.m.

[13:06] in observance of the exact time Mr. LaBelle >> The exact time he was interrupted while saying something seemingly important in its specificity, but never revisited. >> You ruined my life. And I don't even

[13:20] know who the [ __ ] you are. >> Stealing from Thanos without realizing continuing the myth that knocking someone out is as easy as a quick >> The council members must use a weapon that existed during the period in which

[13:32] their ancestor made his or her bargain with Mr. LaBail. the first movie was fun and helped to balance the playing field. All this movie does is expose how insane that is now that one of the families is able to

[13:44] use sniper rifles and automatic weapons. >> In the unlikely event that any of the >> assuming the killer of an entire family isn't prepared or able to kill again. ninth hole green. >> I didn't see games that start by

[13:58] hiding. Also, there's no way they could guarantee that they would both wake up mention the fact that they don't even get to hear the countdown or the These fools should have been blended into deviled eggs before the game even

[14:12] two, one. game has begun and it is important to represent such things with steampunk stuff. >> Wait, wait, wait. Wait. What if those

[14:25] >> Then it's still better than standing around in the middle of the open field first. >> DEFAULT, I'M HERE. ALL I DID was forget >> they both have a great time in the afterlife wondering why they thought

[14:39] >> I'm not agreeing to that. >> Neither would I if I was the dumbass who picked the fancy warhammer over the pistol. Also, not finding a way to equip criminally wasted opportunity. >> There's got to be a tree we could climb.

[14:53] >> You're telling me you didn't know your fiance was in a devil cult? advertise. They didn't meet on Beelzebumble faith. problems. Okay, what does Derek do? Finance?

[15:06] up any job for him that didn't so comically [ __ ] on her own point. >> Movie isn't brave enough to be a full hour of Grace and Faith actually finding a kickass hiding spot and sitting there until dawn. I'd have seen it, but it

[15:20] swing. >> There are no good guys or bad guys. >> Presuming the dichotomy of good and evil doesn't exist purely because evil seems searching for prey and start chitter-chattering about the dichotomy

[15:32] of good and evil just to pass the time, which would be fine if this movie was actually about that. >> You contribute to it. How you enable it. chance that their eyes will roll so far back into their head that they won't see

[15:45] in modern-day hide-and-seeking. If killing them means that Ursula gets the instead of chasing after him? >> Let's make a run for it. It's completely never think things through. >> Look, I'm starting this argument while

[15:59] standing completely exposed and not being impulsive enough. commentary by refusing to include English subtitle translations. The only

[16:11] Ignacio chose a weapon he is biologically unable to make a shot with. luck. >> Who's [ __ ] shooting them? >> Could it Oh, I don't know. Possibly be the guy who had the [ __ ] sniper rifle

[16:24] >> Titus and Ursula's cousin was attempting to text them where Grace and Faith are steps in implying this would be rule break. But when he laid out the rules earlier, he finished by saying >> Beyond that, anything goes.

[16:38] >> You're getting better. >> No, you've just stopped being a moving We need to sit down. >> Choosing to camp out in the middle of a psychopath Disney World. >> Yeah, well, sometimes dreams don't work

[16:52] character including learning anything about her and her dreams beyond former foster child and almost married rich. >> I tried to find you, you know. hospital who managed to find Faith within a matter of hours.

[17:04] >> I hope they both have a great time in the afterlife wondering why they thought >> I can do this. >> You sure can when God is apparently making convenient grinders appear right in your path.

[17:16] Swords that think swinging in thin air is the same as grinding AGAINST METAL. >> [screaming] >> THEY CAN'T. THEY ARE SIMPLY FOR SOME Bringing a blanket to a sword fight. Dammit Faith, how did this slow-moving

[17:29] bag of laundry not stop him? >> We are going to need some glasses cuz >> Premature toast abrasion. Varun shows such little resistance to being shoved that I'm wondering if he actually wanted the experience.

[17:43] >> Trying to make bathtime the new yippee ki-yay. Also, they both seem to be this man, which is weird considering they didn't have to kill him. If it's allowed on the field to play, then they could have just left him locked in

[17:55] escape himself. His brother won't be able to rescue him, and it's not in the him out. So, here is where he would stay for the duration of the game. >> Is it safer to kill him? Sure, but will they sleep better? An industrial washer

[18:08] do it this quickly. It'd take about 10 minutes to get up to temperature, unless this one happens to be running on heated plasma for some reason.

[18:22] but still works after a trip through a skin-meltingly scalding industrial washing machine, when my alleged waterproof phone can't stand just one >> Are you saying you want to abdicate your status as head of the Rajan family?

[18:36] Yes. >> I could spend 27 minutes alone just talking about how insane this choice is. Varun is worried his general cowardice and lack of any real-world skills means he might die if he joins the game. So,

[18:48] he gives up his place as the head of the house, and all the worldly influence and is, he doesn't even have to fight. He can just go out there, pretend to hunt them. The other families aren't allowed to kill him, so Grace and Faith are the

[19:01] down. Sure, he doesn't get to be leader of the council, but he's still head of his own family. It isn't hide and seek, and the seeker dies at dawn, my man. >> [ __ ] >> Martina absolutely freaks out at Varun's

[19:14] choice, meaning she also doesn't see the upside either. You don't have to fight. family fortune, and all you have to do is pretend to play hide and seek. >> Madhu, if you sign that, I will make you very dead.

[19:26] very seriously, given he's about to make her the head of his family. >> Trusting the judgment of the person who just yesterday married into a family of goat murderers. >> I didn't hurt you.

[19:40] the sword isn't here to hurt us. >> that she hasn't hurt you would actually know this. >> Assuming she's the only one who's read her literal contract with the devil and somehow being correct about this.

[19:54] >> If you marry into a high council family, if you marry my son, we get the seat and >> Agreed. This sounds like the highest of high-grade, conveniently plot-serving, >> She just have to do the usual stuff we all have to do.

[20:08] seems to think they could somehow get away with Grace never finding out about the goat slaughtering. Ignacio continues to be precisely the sniper the ladies >> OKAY, YOU CAN'T KILL another member of

[20:21] Couldn't he get away with taking out a leg? This curse is a dick. Grace [ __ ] semantics that Jing just happens to be the owner of the hand between Grace and the sword she was holding to kill him. Mr. LeBael does

[20:35] when it comes to exploding failed family members, so give him that. And send him encourages sin, so you're welcome, Mr. LeBael. all over me. >> The exact opposite thing my college

[20:49] it into the script. She was a master combustor. >> Because I don't want to spend the rest of my life [ __ ] killing people. I'm sure there's a bylaw for that, but she could have at least asked.

[21:03] >> Scoop. >> It broke my >> Some sisters will literally waste time on a competitive pity party in the instead of sticking a pin in it and going to therapy.

[21:15] >> Making up a boyfriend and still coming up with Derek in finance. >> Since we know you own the phone company and you know they have Araj's phone, can't you corrupt oligarch correctly? Also, speaking of tracking phones, what

[21:30] if the next member of Araj's family had location sharing turned on all this they've basically been carrying around an air tag in their pocket. they will see you. >> I'm confused by a Grace and Faith

[21:43] restraint here. Okay, they apparently want them alive so they can help them her? Like something that prevents them from inevitably fighting back. phone, dumbass. >> Playing it so cool during the call in

[21:56] believable. >> Him out of the way, that seat's all >> Yes, absolutely shocking that the devil-worshipping serial killers don't have any qualms with sibling aside. >> Shut the [ __ ] up.

[22:10] forgetting that guns can on occasion work even if you aren't standing right Rumor has it they even work if you're stood completely out of gun-swiping distance of your target. Arquina turns pretty aggressively but is saved by the

[22:23] ignoring her completely. >> What? >> I think she's leaving, boss. >> She is indeed. But why isn't that a rule and yet so few are ACTUALLY SHARED.

[22:35] >> OF COURSE, FAITH DOESN'T RUN, which she really could have gotten help. At this point, she doesn't know that the anything is better than staying behind and also getting caught. Grace and Faith

[22:48] grab the golf cart to avoid Titus, which is almost super smart. All they had to the busted gate, but they instead decide they really want to finish the game. >> Stop treating me like a [ __ ] child.

[23:01] >> Kids, you're no longer the head of your family and your wife controls all of Even though she's chosen not to hunt. >> Movie spills out exactly how insane his new bylaw a couple minutes ago.

[23:14] Mistaking a wedding dress for practical HUMAN HUNTING ATTIRE. until they're out of this mess unless she wants this hunt to end with massive blood loss. >> You don't think

[23:29] superficial sister bickering. It's almost as if this girl power script was experience being sisters to draw upon. >> I can't take care of both of us. I can't >> Oh, it's just like the reason she left her back when they were teenagers. Isn't

[23:43] foresight to put them in such a cathartic situation? And [ __ ] off. >> Accidentally coming up with a better your body and counting now might not be the best moment to take painkillers that

[23:56] >> By [ __ ] activates a perfectly fitting needle drop that would enhance the fight scene

[24:08] movies already cliche. >> You're not even a person, just a collection of organs and meaningless opinions approximating a >> Thing 90% of the comment section says when I dare to send their favorite movie

[24:22] full of pepper spray is not easy to wash off and will persistently [ __ ] your not as this movie suggests be cured by the end of Bonnie Tyler's Total Eclipse extended version. >> I'm going to kill you now.

[24:35] the first movie so much that it decided to furnish Grace with an almost identical lock and load suit up moment. Also, huge wasted opportunity to have aren't decorative. Faith being dragged to the lodge at the exact moment Grace

[24:48] is in the security booth so she can see Faith being brought into the law. Grace ammo on this door. A righteous kill for sure. I'm sure she won't come to regret >> Saying this instead of finishing the [ __ ] dance.

[25:05] >> Why does the pantry door that apparently doesn't even have a functioning lock vegetables at this resort regularly under threat? >> I swear to Mr. LaBelle that no harm shall come to you or your sister.

[25:17] >> It seems that swearing to Mr. LaBelle actually carries some spontaneously explosive consequences, meaning Titus needed to be much more specific with his had to be married or anything. Dude, you've got a lawyer right there. Titus

[25:30] makeover instead of treating the wound in her shoulder before his new bride stogie to demonstrate rich assholery cliche. >> Citation needed. >> You have hope.

[25:44] sister in the last 15 minutes. Ursula has this very incriminating conversation about controlling Titus with the door wide open. Turns out Ursula would suck >> Hey Charles, there's nothing in the rules about

[25:57] >> Take a note of that, Grace. It's very obvious that it might just be important >> Try to keep me in check now. >> Would you look at that? Suddenly bath Frankenstein, this might be the second most faithful adaptation of Wuthering

[26:11] that is so much all the over candling. I bet Mr. LaBelle died waiting for this when there's a room of hooded people, I'm expecting someone surprising to pop the first movie. And we see Ernie was in the first movie

[26:26] be amazing. Wait, is one of them going to be Tom Cruise? God dammit, when is >> Shem Hamforash. >> I have no idea what that means, but I am said something similar and that can't be a coincidence.

[26:40] origins and bastardization of the Shem Hamforash involves 72 angels, the unpronounceable name of God, and a respectfully shitload of Bible math. All through yet another satanic ritual in a horror movie. With all of this regular

[26:56] hands would be scarred to [ __ ] >> You may kiss the bride. this one last piece of proof that he's an absolute [ __ ] just in case we'd him. He should have absolutely seen this coming if the single Danforth twin brain

[27:10] >> [screaming] >> I THINK YOU GOT HIM. >> IT'S NOT against the rules to kill family members. >> Look, can we drop this? It's been yippee ki yay since 1988 for a reason, people.

[27:25] Missing the opportunity to do this while screaming, "This is Samara!" >> Including the audience reaction right there in THE SCRIPT. >> I DON'T KNOW if this [ __ ] was intentional, but the [ __ ] goat is the

[27:37] first one to bow down. I mean, god damn. I'd give that a sin intentional, but right now it's got me cackling through a moment that should be cathartic. >> Terminate this operation.

[27:50] >> But she won't. She'll Frodo that [ __ ] Give up the ring, blow them all up, and democracy and equality will be restored. You know, as is historically the case. >> I hereby remove myself from the council and THIS ENTIRE

[28:07] >> I MEAN, SERIOUSLY, COULD SHE NOT like give world domination a chance for like fruit, like world hunger, homelessness, and people who don't return their >> Bro, can she even do that? >> There's surprisingly little language

[28:20] no one believed anyone would ever willingly give away so much power. buddy boy over here literally did it during the game. This isn't even a hard bylaw to write. Surely it would just pass to faith, right? Why am I better

[28:34] Satan than Satan? Don't answer that. >> Okay, but then who gets the [ __ ] >> Whoever's wearing the ring by dawn. >> But is it just the council families or >> That sounds like there's some pretty [ __ ] specific language about it then,

[28:46] high council families who are eligible. There must be something in the book that specifies it's now a free-for-all. I get the desperation to get the ring, but down here that doesn't involve backflips, belly flops, and rolled

[28:59] ankles? Or is the movie seriously saying they can't help it? Grace makes a pretty that one of these [ __ ] won't fluke their way into wearing the ring at the movie wouldn't let a little thing like logic rob it of its final bloodbath.

[29:13] >> WE MADE IT. WE MADE IT. >> YEAH, I've renounced my pact, so I've >> what the [ __ ] is up with this delay? Was he hiding from the [ __ ] curse until off the best game of hide-and-seek? Also, he makes a good point. He did

[29:26] renounce his pact, very much in the same way that Grace did. So, why isn't she and now Faith will still be going away for the rest of their lives on multiple for the rest of their lives on multiple counts of first-degree murder.

[29:49] damn you all to hell. making extra money by playing some games, click the link in the description

[30:04] I'll keep you posted on what my next favorite game is. Let me know what yours favorite game is. Let me know what yours is down in the comments.