The Christmas Vacation Turkey | With Babish

[00:02] half as good as it looks. I think we're all in for a very big treat.

[00:17] cartoonish depiction of a turkey that we've all surely experienced. One so dry it goes to the Sahara Desert to get a drink. Today we're going to recreate that John Carpenteresque super dry turkey as well as its antipotal

[00:30] turkey as well as its antipotal opposite. The wetest turkey opposite. The wetest turkey in the world.

[00:56] Best Buy. Best Buy should be your go-to this holiday season for gifts, life. Of course, they have favorites like the PlayStation 5 and Sony noise cancelling [music] headphones. They also have GOI string lights and the newest

[01:09] JBL portable speakers. They have kitchen tech, too, like the Kingchi pellet creating the perfect holiday turkey. Shop Best Buy for the most wish for tech this season. All at great prices. All right, my turkeyy's out the freezer.

[01:24] I think it's ready to put in the oven. >> That looks terrible. >> Where'd you Where'd you come from? >> I came all the way here cuz I heard you >> Wow. That's dedication to it. >> That's some Thanksgiving dedic. I'm

[01:36] >> This is Christmas. >> This is Christmas. >> All right. So, I think in order to demonstrate what went wrong in the film >> we need to just do everything wrong to this turkey imaginable. Bake it from

[01:51] frozen. Stab it repeatedly to see if it's done. See if it's still pink in there. Uh, let's just put this in like, I don't know, 400° Fahrenheit oven for enough hours until the juices run clear or there are no juices left ideally.

[02:03] >> And while it's doing that forever, we'll see how to make the antithesis to this turkey. The juiciest turkey ever conceived. Uh, okay. I'm going to just >> get this into the oven downstairs. Uh, because it's probably going to it's

[02:17] >> I don't want it to dry out. That's that's that'd be weird. So, no. No. We're just going to I want this to be, you know, done for guests in 2 hours. without Olivia and put it here in the episode with no Christmas decorations.

[02:31] Why? It's a very good question and what's even more important than the answer to that question is what we can learn from the question itself learn from the question itself specifically about injections.

[02:46] question? >> No. So, that's how to make a cartoonishly dry turkey. But what if you want to make a classic whole turkey preparation that is positively dripping with moisture? For that, we turn to the

[02:59] actually, I don't know if it's hypodermic. This is a barbecue flavor injector. Normally used to inject barbecue with flavor. Today, we're [music] using it to inject our turkey with butter, but not just any butter.

[03:13] Really, really tasty butter. I have here 1 cup of melted butter, cooled, of there. To which I'm going to add a couple gugs of hot sauce, just to wake things up a little bit. About a tablespoon of maple syrup. About a

[03:25] tablespoon of white miso. Just going to up the umami meatiness of everything. and about a/2 cup of turkey stock. Tiny whisk to combine. This is a liquid and emulsified. You're going to have to whisk it pretty frequently to make sure

[03:40] that you're getting both stock and butter in the mix. This is pure, injecting all [music] throughout the turkey. About a stick and a half of butter inside this bird, spread all over it. And that is going to brine it inside

[03:56] and out. So now we want to marinate this 2 to 3 days in the fridge or at least 2 to 3 hours at room temperature. All right, this guy's been hanging out for Before we put them on the smoker, I'm just going to tuck these wing tips

[04:11] prevent them from burning and it's going to stop them from shielding this skin from the heat. So [music] it'll brown up and crisp up more nicely. So now we're going to put it on a 300° Fahrenheit smoker for anywhere from 2 and 1/2 to 4

[04:24] and 1/2 hours depending on the size of your bird. This guy's about 12 13 lb. So your bird. This guy's about 12 13 lb. So I'm guessing 3 hours, but I'm going to be closely monitoring the temperature of the breast meat and the dark meat.

[04:37] Okay, this guy was only on there for about 2 hours and 45 minutes. It's about 150 at the thickest point of the breast, about 160 at the thickest point of the let it rest for at least 30 minutes, ideally an hour before slicing,

[04:52] squeezing for camera, and eating with reckless abandon. Super moist, super tender, [music] super flavorful. What more could you ask from a turkey? So, that's how we make a properly moist

[05:05] classic Thanksgiving turkey. [music] But what if we want to take things a step further? Issuing classic presentation for science and technique. turkey on camera? It seems a little violent.

[05:19] >> Well, most turkey preparations are violent. I don't think that a gallantine >> I mean, we're going to be chopping off its head with a falling blade. [snorts] >> Common common mistake. I hear this one all the time. We're not guillotining a

[05:34] turkey. We're gallentining a turkey. Very very different thing. Now, I'm thinking to make the juiciest turkey in human history, we're going to make a human history, we're going to make a gallantine, which is like the rouad. So,

[05:46] we use translutaminadise to glue the meat to the skin so it doesn't come off. >> And uh to patch up any holes, we stuff it with sausage and herbs. We sousied it. We deep fry it. >> Deep fry it. Oh, I didn't know we were

[05:59] >> Hell yeah. >> Oh, that sounds amazing. ever skinned a turkey? >> I've never skinned a turkey. Oh. >> All right. Let's rip out its spine. >> Let's rip out its spine.

[06:13] that you're holding? >> Uh, the butt. [laughter] knew. No, it's actually called the Pope's nose. >> Oh, the Pope's. You know what? I love these on a duck. So, work at this French

[06:27] restaurant. Roast like ton of duck every day and then nobody eats the ass. These are like the best bits. So we'd have all these roast ducks sitting out and all the line cooks would walk by just like steal a little duck ass. It's the best

[06:40] part of the duck >> crack chiropractor. There we go. >> I think we could just cut the wings off >> And you know what, guys? This is so nice to look at. But we're probably just

[06:55] going to go to the end of this process. >> I think you should show this close up. You see that? Here we see a wild Olivia in a natural habitat destroying a turkey from the inside out.

[07:10] Like all turkeys, this one will die. All dolphins will die. [laughter] >> Okay, >> we did good. >> Yeah, we have our skin and now we need the meat that we can sconce in said

[07:26] skin. Would you do me the kindness of butterflying those breasts, please? pound them out, stuff it in there. We're going to make a little tube. Okay. going to make a little tube. Okay. Impress your mom.

[07:41] it up so when we put the skin on, it can be really like that's the move. Now I and spread that around. >> You won't even know you're eating a turkey, which is kind of the point. >> Here, I'll chop up some herbs.

[07:56] Grated some garlic on there. Thyme and sage. Now it's time to roll it up. You >> Yeah. I didn't put any salt on here. >> That's an interesting point. Let's open >> Yeah, might as well. I'll hit some pepper, too. We also salted the turkey.

[08:11] right? >> Yep, we did. Nobody's lying to you. No, >> Because it's going to effectively dry brine the turkey as this sits in the from the future. >> I think I could wrap this in the skin

[08:26] sprinkling this with trans glutamine. This is otherwise known as mug glue. It glues raw proteins to each other. So that's going to make sure that our rouad doesn't fall apart.

[08:41] pro what you just did. This is a real professional here. Somebody who actually does this for a living. All right. We just got to tie this turkey up with some twine. All right. Well, I ran out of string.

[08:53] >> So, we're just going to pretend that I finished this, right? It finished. Yeah. So, now that that's done, it's going to go in the fridge for 2 days. for us. >> Okay. Here's what it's going to look

[09:06] uncovered. So, now we need to vac seal it, sousie it. Let's seal this guy up >> I think turkeys are terrible and they should just always be ducks. And I've started um making my family do that >> for Thanksgiving and it's amazing.

[09:21] >> That sounds great. >> And everybody's way happier. What if I voice and said, "Now we're going to vacuum seal this." >> Now we're going to vacuum seal it [music] uh in duck fat and sousie it at

[09:34] how many degrees, doctor? >> 150. >> or maybe 45 >> or maybe >> I don't think I sound like you. This is one funky looking thing. I think like

[09:47] >> Oh, yeah. And I'm focused but on everything. [laughter] >> So now this guy's gonna go for four >> 4 hours. And what are we going to do for 4 hours? Play video games.

[10:02] >> You almost killed me, Brad. >> It's his brace for impact. Why do I keep [screaming] >> up over that thing? >> Oh, look at her flip track. Oh no. [laughter]

[10:17] tips? >> I mean, my main thing would be >> Absolutely. >> Um cuz stock by the store is never >> So, my thing is I love to brown the butter. Brown butter gravy. Let's add

[10:32] our flour. >> Eyeball it, which is probably a bad >> Have you ever accidentally brown your butter when you didn't mean to for a r? >> Yeah. >> I was like, hm. Brown butter and gravy.

[10:45] That actually sounds pretty good. Let's throw a little dab of red miso paste in here. Let it get a little heat action. This is our homemade turkey stock. >> Four cups of utterly homemade turkey stock.

[10:59] >> Okay. [laughter] >> So, anyway, that's box stock. >> We did play video games too long. >> Got to make a stock. real cook, real chef. >> You're nervous?

[11:12] >> Oh, >> I've only ever worked in the kitchen of first day. >> Really? >> I don't know. >> Well, you would have had me. Wow, this

[11:25] >> It sure is. Yeah. We're just going to add a little bit of soy sauce for color, life. Uh, let's throw some pepper in there. All right. Yeah. Give it a taste. there. All right. Yeah. Give it a taste. Let's see where we're at.

[11:41] >> Oh, brilliant. Bit of sage. We do this for a living. Leave this to the professionals. >> It's pretty good though for like a box >> We added some some richness to it. >> Mhm. [laughter]

[11:57] >> Oh, that sage helped so much right there. Like Okay. Brilliant. Now it's >> Yes. >> Let that cool off. And now I think we >> I think that's going to be so fun. I'm very excited about the deep frying of

[12:12] really >> Yeah. This has been sous eating at 155 We're going to take it out, harvest its juices, and then we're going to deep fry the whole dang thing. Dang it. Ow.

[12:29] >> Just holding it. No, I'm just joking. I can I can hand No, I'm just joking. I can I can hand the lads hot. huh? [music] I you know what? I might be changed. I do think this is going to be

[12:42] >> I do. Yeah. No, I agree. Like sometimes sometimes we're just straight up lying >> That's not true. Actually, I go way too hard to make sure that that's not true. >> Wow. Okay. Damn. >> And if you thought that looked good,

[12:57] string because we're afraid it's going to explode. But it's going to deep fry beautifully. It is a little little >> I'm holding it like a baby. Well, babies aren't supposed to curve like that. >> Are you guys somewhat afraid that you

[13:12] >> We're afraid of nothing. >> No. No. >> But I don't live here. >> No. >> I know where the door is. >> Down we go.

[13:25] >> Nice. >> And back away, [laughter] >> Yeah. >> And kill [laughter] the heat and step

[13:39] away. I'm going go ahead and call this inadvisable. >> Yeah. In a like a volcano erupting in a very dangerous kind of way.

[13:52] color. If we can just >> we can just get through this alive. >> Give it a little flips. >> Well, this is very exciting. >> Yeah. It's it's as exciting as it is frightening, which is amongst the

[14:06] >> I would agree. >> They walk hand in hand. >> There we go. >> Holy. >> Wow. That is beautiful. >> I'm so exhilarated right now.

[14:19] >> I'll cut off the the string and you do the you do the honors. >> It looks insane. I don't know what it is. Is that an alien creature?

[14:34] >> Is that sausage? >> Oh, it's the sausage. >> It's sausage. All right, mind your business. business. >> Look at how juicy it is. Come on. Can't

[14:46] be mad at something that juicy. So, here it is. The juiciest turkey that So, here it is. The juiciest turkey that ever t that ever gobbled.

[14:59] >> It's so flavorful. And the sousvid just keeps it like no turkey breast [music] not possible. >> I just got a big bite that was mostly turkey and it was so good. >> It's so juicy. Look at that.

[15:13] >> Your mom [music] could never. >> Well, thank you so much for coming today. >> Yeah. No, too much probably. And I hope that people try making this gallantine very carefully because when you put it

[15:27] very carefully because when you put it in the oil, it threatens your very life. But I think the results are worth it. >> I think so, too. You could also probably like pan sear it. I feel like maybe we didn't need to do that. [laughter]

[15:43] And finally, 8 hours later, long after the sun had said good night and Olivia had left the studio and the stillness of night blanketed my cozy kitchen, it was time for our film accurate recreation to emerge. [music] And it was everything I

[15:58] emerge. [music] And it was everything I feared it would be. All right, folks. Little bit of movie magic. Olivia couldn't stick around long enough for this turkey to get out of the oven because it was frozen solid. And uh

[16:10] I did everything right. I cooked it from rockh hard frozen at 400° for about 6 hours. I repeatedly stabbed it to see if there was any pink left. Uh and the the time the little bouncy guy finally popped out. So clearly it's done. Oh,

[16:26] popped out. So clearly it's done. Oh, it's crispy skin. That is >> Did the steam coming out of it looks

[16:38] hilarious? >> Look at this. Ready? Watch this. >> Look at this. Ready? Watch this. Just It's just paper. It's just pulp.

[16:50] Just It's just paper. It's just pulp. Oh, it's so so very dry. moisture out of my mouth. I don't know if I could have gotten it down without a

[17:03] big slurp of water. So, we've clearly nailed the source material here. Um, nailed the source material here. Um, this is a spitten image of what was made by the Grisswald family for the holidays. Also, uh, fear not. Though

[17:16] this bird is ruined for eating, it will make for good stock. We will get utility out of it yet. You did not die entirely [music] in vain. So, what do we learn here today? One way to ruin a turkey and two ways to make it good. And that's

[17:30] what the holidays are all about. I'm being told that's not what the holidays are all about because >> you had an earpiece. >> Yes. This is the news. This the new. Make the background the news. Hello.

[17:44] Buy for sponsoring this episode. No matter who's on your shopping list this year, you can find something for them at Best Buy. They have gifts for every age, interest, and hobby. From tech to kitchen to the season's musthaves, you

[17:57] can find them all [music] in one place. There's still time to shop in store or online before the end of the year. Head to the link in the description.

[18:09] Hello and welcome to Babish Evening Local News 5. Your eye in the sky. Local News 5. Your eye in the sky. Tonight on Babish is own news, local news, Babish's news. We have a huge thing happening out in the field. For

[18:23] more, we go to Babish. Thanks, Babish. As you can see behind me, the scene is quite a scene and it's ongoing. It's developing and at large. So, um,

[18:35] everybody stay in your homes. Do not uh go away from your homes if it's bad and do not leave your homes if it's not bad. So, so do that and everything will be okay. Back to you, Babish.

[18:50] Thank you very much for risking your life out there, Babish, to bring us this this this this [music] Pulitzer Prizewinning report on the thing that is Prizewinning report on the thing that is happening. Good night and and good and

[19:02] and good. There's nothing better than good good. There's nothing better than good luck. Good night and keep and the the luck. Good night and keep and the the walls have ears.