Iron Lung Critique — Full Transcript & Summary

[00:00] The stars are going.

[00:12] Trying to make a movie with no stars. Also, before you get started with your extensive knowledge of the game lore, this is CinemaSense, not VideoGameSense. Though, based on my notes, I'm probably going to criticize both. Also, also, jumping right into your movies without giving us at least a few seconds of opening logo foreplay.

[00:27] The opening logos are the most important part of easing into the movie experience. There is barely enough of us left to give the end the name The Quiet Rapture. So you're telling me humanity was staring down the barrel of extinction and landed on the name of an indie folk album?

[00:42] Also, naming something doesn't require a large population. In fact, the fewer survivors there are, the easier it should be to agree on a name. Also, also, humanity watched stars disappear across the cosmos and concluded the event was quiet, even though anyone who would have heard anything didn't survive.

[00:56] Maybe it made a weird fart noise. You don't know. Supplies dwindle. Infrastructure crumbles. Sci-fi not knowing how to do any kind of future other than dystopia, despite millennia of evidence that on a large scale, things continue to get more prosperous over time, not worse.

[01:10] Also, who is this guy? And why am I listening to his particularly pessimistic economics podcast? Too few to rebuild. Too many to feed. This unexpected indictment of construction workers and how much they eat for lunch. Humanity decays.

[01:23] But don't despair, my son. Having a long list of despairing remarks followed by an instruction not to despair. This is just like that time my sports ball coach told me how only an infinitesimal percentage of players make a living off of the sport.

[01:36] And then thought that would encourage me to try harder. Instead of actually encouraging me to f*** off the AD club and work on my 40-year-old virgin suicide mashup. The consolidation. They hide their technology, their people.

[01:49] They won't tell you what they found. But I will. Said like a man not about to immediately f*** off. presumably to AV Club, after answering about 1% of my questions. An ocean of blood. Elizabeth Holmes letting her fan fiction get out of hand for a second time somehow makes it into the script.

[02:05] Also, horror has a long tradition of somebody thinking of an upsetting image first, worrying about the social implications of the thought, and only then figuring out how to call it fuck. At some point, someone said, What if there was an ocean of blood? And thank God, instead of working out the astronomical math on the real thing,

[02:20] they worked out a budget and a screenplay. And since the nerds would have preferred game script, I'll add a separate scene for them. The classic storytelling technique of rubbing your thing until the audience notices it. Suggesting other movie to start while waiting for this movie to get beyond its trombone's porn and actually do something.

[02:36] It's been two minutes already, I'm tired. Simon having his hood on inside the sub like any mystery man with chewy ears who needs to remain mysterious and cozy, but mostly mysterious. No, not the voltage irregularities! Is there no God?

[02:54] Because of the voltage irregularities, dumbass, pay attention. You just test this thing, right? This is a test. Taking your operating procedural cues from Ocean Gate. Hey, John, you have the whole start of the show at that glass, right?

[03:06] Yeah. Closing porthole showdown. This porthole exists despite providing almost no visibility once the vehicle is submerged in blood. but the story will eventually mean the structural weakness to exploit some outstanding work window. While we have our circuit scans, that's why you're there.

[03:20] Well, what a reason. We get a casual reveal that there's another reason he's on this mission, which should immediately become the most important part of the conversation. Instead, both of them decide they've learned enough for today. Uh, hey, you said not to go into the red.

[03:32] We're in the red. Take your water to code red. You can't be serious. You can't be serious. You can't be serious. Excitement? Entire planets disappear, and somehow the distribution statement survives. bureaucracy remains Earth's most resilient life form.

[03:46] He's now reading the HemoRover manual, which literally translates to BloodRover. And I swear if this is just a gritty reboot of Interspace, I'm going to be... Actually, that sounds awesome. I guess now if it isn't a gritty reboot of Interspace, I'm going to be pissed.

[03:58] The new game have big button. Movie have big button. Me understand adaptation, but not fire. Also, in terms of titling, I like big buttons and I cannot lie, I would have been far more sprung. Yeah, well, I think that's cool. Simon is discovering the submersible's basic features

[04:11] in real time, which suggests nobody thought it was worth training the operator before launching a supposedly critical mission. An interesting philosophy for an organization that will keep insisting failure isn't an option. Also, this entire opening plays so much like the video game cutscene into gameplay that

[04:25] I went and grabbed my PlayStation controller out of habit, and now I'm just frustrated that I can't make this dude wander around aimlessly looking at the walls for hidden clues and YouTube celebrity face texture mapping cheat codes. Okay, I'm down.

[04:37] I have to go. Photographic fetch quests feel much more tedious in live action than they even do in the video games they come from. Sticking cloth has disguised itself as life support cliche. The way this blood sub sweats is way too reminiscent of my older brother's

[04:50] saliva when he used to pin me down and hang it over my face as torture. What can I say? The world was a very strange place before the internet, guys. Okay, I think I may already be tired of being in this sub and we're not even ten minutes into the movie. Movie prematurely assumes I would have seen this scene simply for its weird ass tubes

[05:04] demonstrating a complete ignorance of the evolution of cinema sense. You're not just pretending you can't hear me, right? Sorry, I was just dozing off. It's been two minutes since he's said anything, and I put my controller down because it wasn't working. I'll try to stay engaged and pay more attention to the genius

[05:16] atmosphere work from now on, I promise. My balls every July. Every time a dude looks at something gross in a movie for over 10 seconds before then frantically removing it, I think of that time in The X-Files where Mulder had goo drip on him and turned to Scully and said, what's the fastest way

[05:31] I can get this off me without betraying my cool exterior? And I smile, as if there's some sort of cinematic delay on the human instinct to wipe stuff off our hands immediately. Ah, good times. Anyway, are we still in a tiny sub with a monosyllabic protagonist who speaks a word

[05:45] or two every three minutes while going around taking blurry photos of things while the sub drips? Cool! Carry on then. This terrible cord hose maintenance on what is otherwise clearly a very well cared for and maintained plasma mobile. The camera remains stationary

[05:57] while Simon gets thrown around the sub, which accidentally transforms a fight with an alien outside the sub into a fight with a ghost inside the sub. Or, Markiplier clearly went to the Star Trek acting school of flying around the room as

[06:09] the camera slightly shakes things. Laying on the ground and not being sure if you fell or not. She didn't ask why you fell, she asked if you fell. You did!

[06:21] You didn't tell me that that was the end of your career! Assuming that you were being sent on a mission to discover things that weren't down there. Um, uh, seems fine. It does not. Also seems fine being my initial reaction to the movie and somehow making it into the script.

[06:35] The bottom is in dusty rock. But I thought you just said you were deciding if you should send him back down. My semantical arms are firing on all cylinders about how this would work if he already on the bottom of the thing we see Sonic are you absolutely sure that it was a skeleton Asking the person who isn currently looking at the picture for clarity about the picture you are currently looking at

[06:54] How specific do you think I am? Very. We'll call you up. Stand by. And they will pull him up, and they will show us all of it in real time from inside the sub. Riveting. Using a fabric glove to wipe the porthole window instead of a blood squeegee. What? You don't have any blood squeegees?

[07:07] Quick! There's a void in the market space! Contact private equity! The captain has a large facial scar, which tells me she's experienced. Looks like a resume. The resumes were applied directly to the face. She's one of the next person I'm going to find. This has been a long time.

[07:19] My advice to my college ex-girlfriend after she dumped me somehow makes it into the script. But, captain, the issue is that the script has you not being worried about it.

[07:31] And for the sake of the mission, I'm worried that it doesn't make any sense. Every space civilization eventually develops a council. but somehow never a board of odor evaluation. This seems odd to me. We're moving on the sub right up front.

[07:44] Being in a time crunch and still holding the thing you were going to put on the sub when you've had plenty of time to start installing it already. And yes, I know you mentioned something about Jack needing to get there to do the welding, but I'm still not sure why this wasn't just installed as part of the ship in the first place

[07:56] if you had it ready to go. All you've got to do is point in the right direction. And if in time, you have to be able to grab on something and hold on tight. Major documentary narration about cat penises managed to end up the film. Are you sure you're serious?

[08:08] Thinking making you can't be serious your catchphrase is a good idea. Why did you do it yourself? This is exactly how I need to love more than you deserve. Did we ever find out the heinous things this man did to be sent down as an indentured globin' up?

[08:21] And more importantly, do we care? I gave him real life history. You're not a carrier! Technically, you did volunteer. The mission may have been coercive, but the paperwork appears to be in order. Oh, you're actually making me sickly as f**k. What? It's not normal.

[08:33] cameras can't see through water, so you need x-rays to get through. Installing a radioactive x-ray camera with a giant rectangular button on the wall with no surface-disabling safety measures. Sure, he meant to push it, but that could have happened just as easily

[08:46] if he stepped on a discarded banana peel. Also, this entire radiation incident exists because the movie suddenly remembered it should explain how the camera works. Maybe if he was talking, it wouldn't have happened. Talking is good, but protocols are better. The movie expects me to believe OSHA didn't survive the quiet rapture,

[09:00] and I do not believe your movie. And they do drop him. And it's yet another example of style dictating the script more than the motivations of people actually trying to survive. Also, no, that's not how immediate free fall works. Both the sub and its contents would fall at a similar enough rate that there would be little to no anti-gravitational effect that quickly unless he jumped right as they dropped him.

[09:19] Or unless they used a propulsive force in launching the sub back down to the large. Which seems about as wasteful as not acting on that blood-squeezing tip I gave you earlier. Convict, this is serious. Convict Shield. This company sure does like to leave the important stuff in the hands of their convict slave labor, don't they?

[09:37] Oh, look who woke up and is trying to be excellent at touring cinemas and... Sucks for you that it's still simple and that you didn't try to make sure this was done before you launched him again.

[09:51] Okay, now I feel like we're in an actual conversation. You know, you can focus on the movie instead of replying to my sins, right? Besides, the explanations are never satisfactory and forever convenient anyway. I'm a master at sucking out over-explaining excuses. Have you met my college ex-girlfriend?

[10:03] Things are somehow faster when I don't know what I'm doing. Urgence. If I were in charge, you would know more. I should give it some results, but I'm not just a con in the scene. Humanity is apparently one bad week away from extinction,

[10:15] yet still committed to withholding useful information because the org chart says so. Remarkable faith in progress. You're fully vying for it. I want to talk about the last tree. Not about the tree.

[10:27] The movie introduces the mysterious religions. centered around the last tree, and immediately informs me the tree isn't the important part. But if he had left the tree for like five minutes so I could understand the world... The comments section for our Madam Web video.

[10:45] Thus begins horror's favorite game of Is the Spooky Presence Actually There? Maybe it wasn't a light. Food. Air. Who needs air? Humanity is desperately searching for biological resources while floating in an ocean of biological resources.

[10:58] Feels like we should have been privy to at least one meeting about the blood. Releasing radiation into the universe just to wipe the corner of your sub-asylum. Simon finds a pendant from a previous pilot, which gives the movie another character to think about.

[11:12] Because one guy in a chair is still one guy in a chair levels of exciting. Also, it's so dark, I must assume this is a mosquito trapped in amber from Jurassic Park. Releasing radiation into the universe just to read a three-word note when the glow of the giant camera button probably would have done the trick.

[11:27] Doing what a random piece of paper tells you to do despite the well-known warnings of Dr. Egon Spengler. I love how the presence of this minigame puzzle and the computer firing up for you is enough to completely erase the trauma of the fact that a few seconds ago

[11:39] you saw a freaking sub-ghost. So far, it's doing a terrible job of both. Being the deep space Debbie Downer.

[11:58] Also, Simon finds a computer with a message recorded on it, and instead of immediately and intently exploring the computer for more clues, he just casually listens to the message like he's taking in an audiobook on a summer drive. Being surprised that something in a fluidly dynamic situation has moved positions since you saw it 20 minutes ago.

[12:14] And or not thinking that it could have been alive and swam away based on your new knowledge that your pictures are x-rays. Talking to the blood-flood skeletons you took a picture of a while back. Even though, even if they were there, they couldn't hear you.

[12:26] Because you're whispering from the other side of solid material. A reactive fire suppression procedure is diabolical. And he keeps referring to the submarine as a rover, which is creating a mystery that I don't think was supposed to be a mystery. I'm not sure that water moving slowly down rusted metal is as creepy as this movie thinks it is.

[12:41] I think that kind of s*** happened on my bumper every time it rained. Ah, well, this is going to sound made up. This whole movie does indeed sound made up. No, it's just more hell. These movies really need to stop having their communications hardware set up by horror movie tension cliches R-off.

[12:55] You're so guessing that this is bad, Bob. Sure. Trying to give off Keanu Reeves energy in your first movie whilst not being Keanu Reeves. There is too much at stake not to take calculated risks. Eden doesn't understand that.

[13:07] You don't understand that. I also don't understand that. This movie is about to make me beg for at least some softcore expositioning, and I do not like who it's turning me into. Is that why we destroyed government spaces?

[13:19] I wasn't supposed to have some softcore expositioning. You can apologize to him, Jimmer. It not a too much So ram it Just ram it Just ram it Get the job done Script recognizes that my college girlfriend may have been blunt but she did have John Wick focused And then I free

[13:35] Then you come back up. And then I'm free. Prioritizing your self-narrative at the expense of the obvious reality that has been clearly stated to you. Is that it? With all the build-up, I thought that might be something a bit more caramorous. Do you get it? He's speaking for the audience.

[13:48] You know something's about to go down. And this is all a false tension release. So the movie uses meta-commentary as a way to hang a lantern on its own sins. Do you get it? Yes. Yes. Well, at least the end of the part of the movie without easy conspiracy theories about dead characters,

[14:02] hallucinations, or CO2 delusions. But if you think that's going to stop us from sinning, what might all be non-existent events, you might be experiencing one of those things yourself. I mean, hopefully not the first one, but still. Close-up of the characters' opening eye as they awaken to a new reality

[14:15] where there is a reflection of giant blood ocean x-ray button that reminds me suspiciously of those glowing USB ports on some plane's cliche. As Simon continues to use his camera for ambient light, I have to ask. Can this thing take an unlimited amount of x-rays? My dentist has to swap s**t out between every click.

[14:30] And hell, even digital storage has to run out at some point, right? Guess I won't be needing this anymore. But also, he will need it because it's Chekhov's light vest. That water's so good. The whole time?

[14:42] I'm assuming he says this because it's dark and scary. But I'm not sure. Because it's dark and it looks like my screen just turned off. Simon spits on that thing and risks being known as the hot boogie bro. So, this guy really sucks at coming up with good catchphrases.

[14:58] Taking all the good jobs also just works. The fucking rule three. The muffled speech coming out of the radio is irritating enough, and now Simon is doing it live.

[15:15] It's funny because everybody who has played a video game knows this feeling. It's not funny because in a real life situation, every manual could actually save your life. This ain't the library of myths, man. F***ing actress. Thank you, he realized that a sequel to Buried called Bloody was on the table.

[15:29] And maybe better. Glad you found a way to power up the lights so that I can now see 10% of what's going on instead of 2%. You've advanced from milk to tithe. But if there's a way you could eventually get up to solid restaurant tips, I'd appreciate it. This almost worked.

[15:42] This almost worked. Just because the whole ocean is blood doesn't mean you shouldn't get this off your face as fast as you can. This whole breach is on for all to some time.

[15:57] This fire's on for all the continuing the whole breach on for all to some time, for all to some time. Also, for what it's worth, any kind of whole breach at this supposed depth would result in immediate implosion. So throw some firewood on the old, he's already dead conspiracy fire if you like, but this sub should no longer be subbing.

[16:13] SHUT THE F*** UP! Dismailing the messenger. That feeling when the back of your bra rides up when you're taking off your shirt. Freaking rubbing alcohol ever, especially when it's not even enough to give you a decent buzz. Also, using the mini ball and not considering how much it might cost you.

[16:27] Come on, go now. He is. We will now spend a couple minutes pretending the most thrilling parts of video games are the parts where you have to map f***ing mazes.

[16:39] Hello everyone, my name is Simon. I like to do jewelry. Surprised to the point of dropping your pencil, cliche. Facing your scary underwater creature on the mascots from the old Dow Scrubbing Bubbles commercial.

[16:51] Just pretend like I'm not even here. Like this movie is doing with that freaking sub-goat from earlier. Yeah, sure, I can do that. But also, pretending you're not here would have serious consequences for the screenplay.

[17:03] Literate. Why do you need to prop the throttle open? And why is the throttle able to be propped open by a binder? Just realize this part of the map looks like a uterus. And now all the blood has an even more interesting context. Look, buddy, you're the one out here touching and drinking everything you find.

[17:17] So don't be getting all high and mighty about the Alien franchise when you've clearly been copying it this whole time. This movie is 82% close-up shots, masquerading as story momentum. Stealing my thoughts on the last ten minutes of this movie.

[17:29] Of course, when I was thinking do something, I wasn't thinking just throw in some random as of yet incomprehensible backstory that just serves as more hallucinogenic atmosphere. But you do you, movie! Hey, what are you doing down there? Spoken as if it wouldn't stand to reason that they were doing the same s**t as you.

[17:44] Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait.

[17:56] Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Waiting. Deciding that having a large segment of your audience's experience be what if your annoying unfastened seatbelt warning alarm was a movie. Not a problem. Saying this and then playing the computer like the plot's position is not the same as it is.

[18:12] What a f***ing circle. Sometime around when you started drawing your map back to the place you started, you should have begun to suspect it was a circle. Stop pretending this revelation was not just more exposition. Also, going in a circle seems like it wasn't such a bad thing,

[18:25] considering you now have a useful map. Looks like you've eliminated all the choices except the right one. So just go and win the game or whatever. Oh, nice. Sorry. Apologizing to the sturdy desk you barely hit, instead of the warning speaker you annihilated earlier for just doing its job.

[18:39] I'm going to let it try. This movie is doing a great job at being a metaphor for how hard it is to find and try every single new experimental flavor that Mountain Dew throws into stores. And I am relating to Graco with the completion themes and dogged exploration of the carbonated journey.

[18:52] That is what this movie is about, right? What are you thinking? I don't care, what do you know? Death delusions, CO2 poisoning, hallucinations, whatever.

[19:04] The only thing that's more ridiculous than this sub still being intact this long is that there's another sub down here with people still surviving, and he should be having some major questions right now. Can you just keep talking to me? What would be the point? You have to turn out his head, Doctor.

[19:16] He didn't say he would be talking back. Jeez, mystery ghost lady, just tell the guy a story or something. You have to turn out his head, Doctor. You have to turn out his head, Doctor. You have to turn out his head, Doctor. The audio coming out of that speaker is getting very rough to listen to.

[19:29] Yes, of course, it's a quiet, proud job for a fragment of it, at least. I'd send the movie for expositioning us at this point, but I'm not sure the movie understands how to actually deliver information that moves the story forward. It seems to think they're saying random mysterious shit will keep us interested.

[19:42] And honestly, I've had those friends, and I got rid of them for a reason. I don't know if you're just my imagination. Run away with me! I don't want to feel anymore. Yeah, same, but considering there's still a whole breach, and this speaker isn't capable of chirping to you about it,

[19:56] but he's capable of broadcasting from this mystery ghost sub, I think you should probably have a bit of a clue. So this is more likely that every planet and star disappeared, or that a few space stations disappeared. Asking reasonable questions while you are currently exploring a blood ocean is admirable but somehow almost more ridiculous at the same time Isn it easy to believe that they still there wondering where all of us went Is that more likely Not sure if it more likely but it does at least sound like a better movie I can believe that everything

[20:21] turned out that way. Yeah, I never had anything to be honest with. But you don't have anything to give and therefore don't get to survive. You aren't listening, Simon! Also, you do have that cool pog slammer you found. So, we're still looking for it?

[20:33] Maybe, yeah. Objection! Call for speculation, Your Honor! Sorry, when I get bored, I revert to courtroom rules. I'll try to do better. It's unusual what happened. How's the only one trying to stop it? Citation needed. Lord leaves the coherent scene about it.

[20:46] I didn't blow up the filament station, but the ones you did aren't getting caught. Just me. Permission to treat the witnesses hostile, Your Honor? So, Simon, the big reveal is that people think you blew up filament station, a place we know very little about, and that you didn't do it, but someone else, whom we haven't even met or had info on, did blow it up.

[21:02] Exactly how is this information supposed to help us understand you as a character better or contextualize the choices you've made on this journey? The prosecution rests your honor. Not because any of that made sense. I'm just tired.

[21:14] It is not. In fact, we're already 75% through this movie, and I can already tell it cares as much about getting actual answers as I care about the keyboard warriors in the comments section who are reading their fan theories as proof that this movie is flawless and I'm full of s***.

[21:26] I already know I'm full of s***. It's the one sure thing about assholes. Everything that is happening here seems very cool, but I have no idea what the f*** any of it is. Okay, that f***ing rule. Take your sin off, you mad penis.

[21:41] But also, avatar. Oh.

[21:55] Reminding me of that one time at spring break, when I went to the place the event horizon went. No one will be seated during the interlude of inconsequential hallucinations. Who is this? I'm the magic magic. I don't even know how you survive. Movie magic, mostly. If he is alive.

[22:08] Tell me how many people give me your number! Three, three, three. This, of course, in no way proves anything to him. Because if it is his own mind playing tricks, of course he knows this information. But the fact that he should have known better isn't the important thing.

[22:20] It's that the audience doesn't gain anything from this moment to ground them in any sort of reality. Or give them any new info to contextualize Simon's experience. Do all movies have to be about clarity of character, story, narrative, and structure? Yes! Yes, they do! Because I said so!

[22:32] What's my name? This isn't helping, Aaron. If what Ava means is that this isn't helping to move the story along, then she would be excellent at cinema sense. Where's my name? Discount Destiny's Child. You sent me down here to die and you don't even know my name?

[22:44] Not making a hard right into the Fight Club verse and telling him his name is Robert Paulson. And listen, this is just what happens when you keep me confined to a small space for an extended period of time. It's good that I have one life left. Scene does not contain a Cardassian trying to convince Simon that he started with five life of oxygen.

[22:59] A lone pregnant isn't going to tell us anything that we haven't already seen with our own eyes. So why did you want it in the first place? Ava's motives are anywhere from confusing to non-existent. The SM8.

[23:11] I almost didn't know there was a name on the kind of big f***ing hole in the side of it. That was just a lie. It was very legible. Did you say SM8? How do you know about that shit? It had letters on it. I can read. God damn it. Open your f***ing ears.

[23:24] I love you, Juan. You gotta come down here and get it. Like Olive Jack's girlfriend when she lived two floors down. You're lucky I'm not sending you down there instead. Power-tripping bully bosses who threaten you with a trip to the demon anglerfish blood zoo.

[23:36] You can make it to the SMA and back out. We can meet you outside the entrance in 30 minutes. I'm serious. You have got to be there in 30 minutes or I'm gone. The movie's oxygen countdown has been thoroughly compromised by demon air shenanigans,

[23:48] so we're upgrading to the more reliable being here before the train news model. If we could pull this off, there's hope. For the COI, for Eden, for everyone, nothing else matters compared to this.

[24:00] Nothing else matters compared to this is a difficult philosophy to reconcile with the whole be here in 30 minutes or I'm leaving policy. Also, we can't spend way too much time convincing us that none of this is real. For me to care about any of this actually matters.

[24:12] You've got the highest body count out here, killer. This conversation briefly taking an unexpected turn into modern dating discourse. Watch it down there. It's really f***ing difficult to hear, but his mind audio seems to be suggesting that he isn't alone in the sub.

[24:24] Too bad the movie has left me alone to not figure any of this out on my own. Blood Demon, sir, I served with Captain America. I knew Captain America. Captain America was a friend of mine, and you are no Captain America.

[24:37] That's a lot. It's incredibly f***ing hard to hear, but the radio is basically saying that Satan's toilet green is people,

[24:52] and more of that movie would have been nice. Is the radiation causing these wounds, or is it the aliens? And if it's the aliens, are they doing it with their minds, or is this blood filled with the fastest acting Ebola ever? Trying to bring back your awesome catchphrase in the final act,

[25:06] but forgetting that it wasn't actually awesome. Trying to bring back your awesome secondary catchphrase in the final act, but forgetting that it also wasn't actually awesome. Attempting to give Taco Bell new advertising slogans.

[25:19] Simon crawled to freedom through five yards of blood alien foulness I can't even imagine. Or maybe I just don't want to. Five whole yards. That's the length of over a full basketball rim height. And just shy of actually being difficult.

[25:33] And we all came out exactly as confused as we started on the other side. Scooby never explains why the blood mutates Simon and his sub, but just lets the black box go unmutated through this whole blood flood. You know, if any of this actually happened.

[25:45] Sub blood can apparently only grab its victims by direct hand-to-pipe contact, much like my college ex-girlfriend. This shit is disgusting. Well done. Sorry! You are so butcher! I'm pretty sure this would be fucking awesome

[25:57] if I could tell what was actually happening behind the extremely shaky camification of all movies. Something, something, something, pressure, something, something, something, explosion. Winning? Booty takes the dark ending of the game and adds a splash of bloody hope to it

[26:09] because it knows we nihilists are too convinced of the universe's never-ending trauma to give a shit. Well played, Market Blab. Well played, indeed. Thank you.

[26:49] Oh, yes. I hate this. It is revolting. More? Please.